


this godforsaken mess, this idiotic fool

by septiceyesweetheart



Category: Animaniacs
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety Attacks, Canonical Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Siblings, Sad and Happy, Songfic, Therapy, Trauma, Underage Drinking, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, dw none of the warners die, i really just said imma make these feral babies sad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:35:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 54,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27262084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/septiceyesweetheart/pseuds/septiceyesweetheart
Summary: the tower: in tarot, this represent drastic change. it feels as thought the universe is inserting itself into your life and creating chaos. it feels painful and very out of control, but the purpose of destroying the tower is to make room for a new one. it’s life altering but it’s for the best.it doesn’t feel that way to yakko warner.
Relationships: Dot Warner & Wakko Warner & Yakko Warner, Dr. Otto Scratchansniff & Dot Warner & Wakko Warner & Yakko Warner
Comments: 230
Kudos: 290





	1. the thrill expired

**Author's Note:**

> can you believe i managed to apply 2 different breakup songs and divination to such a zany trio bc i sure as hell can’t lmao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cardigan - taylor swift  
> illicit affairs - taylor swift

weekday mornings started off with one of three things: singing, bickering, or both. whether dot was telling wakko off for finishing the cereal for the fourth day in a row, or wakko banging on the bathroom door because dot was taking too long, there was always something. the dinky little two bed one bath was never quiet. they were lucky they didn’t get any noise complaints.

yakko never had to intervene. the sibs could usually figure things out and finish getting ready with time to spare. however, it was seven twenty-five and they were supposed to be in the car at seven fifteen for everyone to make it on time, and yakko couldn’t afford to be late for work again.

“don’t make me come in there!” he called as he very much went in there.

the bathroom bickering did not falter, words that would have been censored by the execs were flying left and right. yakko had to dodge a few before entering the small space.

wakko and dot were fighting over the space in front of the sink. dot was shoving her lipstick in wakko’s face to get him away, while wakko tried to shove his toothbrush up his sister’s nose. after failing to remove the other, both siblings dropped their items and bust out the mallets.

_welp. now’s a good as time as any to step in._

yakko placed his hands on the heads of each mallet and tried to not only diffuse, but resolve the situation. 

“wakko, don’t you have a sink in your gag bag?” he asked his younger brother. “you have a toilet in there, surely you have a working sink, right?”

as it turns out, it was the right thing to say to get wakko to back down, but it was bad for his spirits and general mood. wakko shoved the mallet in his pocket and looked down.

“i left it at the tower,” he mumbled as he stepped out of the bathroom. 

it hit yakko in a funny place. his chest tightened a little as he watched a metaphorical storm cloud form over his brother’s head as he got ready to go to school with stinky breath. but there was still no time. 

yakko turned to his sister.

“take the mirror with you.” he nodded to the medicine cabinet. “you can finish your makeup in the car. we have to go.”

“sheesh, when’d you get so…” dot folded her arms and tilted her head as she observed her older brother.

“serious?” yakko finished.

“i was gonna say boring. your age is finally showing! anyways-“ she reached for the medicine cabinet, pulled the door off its hinges, and easily slid it into her pocket.

yakko didn’t say anything because of the time crunch, but he had a feeling that comment would come back to him later. 

_nineteen isn’t old and boring, is it? then again, fourteen feels like it was only twenty something years ago. dot’s now the age you were when you all lived at the tower._

dot practically bounced outside and to the car. wakko all but dragged his feet. yakko was just glad they could finally get going. they piled into the vehicle and sped off down the road.

whenever she was in the passenger seat, dot was in charge of the music. yakko figured that that was how she managed to be so energetic that early in the morning. it’s how she was able to be excited for mundane human school.

dot went through phases with her music: first she and her brothers would make up their own songs and have a concert on the drive to school. then, she discovered spotify, and all she listened to was david bowie. then it was evanescence, then one direction, then rise against, and now it was taylor swift. yakko took note of the songs that piqued his interest and added them to his own playlist. it was hard to find music he liked on his own, so he lived vicariously through his sister’s interests for the time being.

that’s not to say that wakko didn’t like anything. he was just quiet about… well, everything. he was always the most quiet of the three, but he had been especially withdrawn since the tower. yakko didn’t try to fish anything out of him, but it’s not that he didn’t care.

“hey, wakko,” he said, peering at his brother through the rear view mirror. “i’m sorry about your gag bag. didn’t know you left it behind.”

“because i thought we’d be going back,” wakko replied, staring out the window.

“we all left stuff behind,” said dot, who now had the large mirror sitting up on her lap. she looked at the lipstick in her hand, brows furrowed. “human makeup is weird. liquid catsuit? did michelle pfeiffer make this?” 

“i will get a new gag bag and some new makeup, alright?” yakko told them.

that was when wakko met his gaze through the mirror. “where in this world are you gonna find a sack like mine?”

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ goodnight everybody!”

wakko rolled his eyes and resumed looking out the window.

the car was silent aside from miss swift’s dulcet tones. but it was never silent for long.

“i wanna make a movie,” dot mused when she finished with her face, “and have this song as the theme.”

“a romance thriller horror?” yakko guessed. 

“exactly!” and she went on about how she would cast herself and one of the famous chris’s as the leading couple. they would get married for the movie publicity but then fall in love for real.

out of all the warners, dot wanted to get back into hollywood the most. apparently, auditioning for a role in her school’s productions wasn’t enough, and it wasn’t only because she was never cast as the lead… or cast at all. (it was starting to feel like this public school for humans had something against toons.) she had yakko drive her to different auditions around town on the weekends. no matter what it was - a commercial, a modeling gig - if there was a role to be filled, dot took a shot at it.

at least one of the warners had proper goals. breaking back into showbiz didn’t seem that far fetched at first, given how well all three of them did in the business. but it was _very_ hard to get back in if you didn’t have the right connections, which the warners did not have. not anymore.

nevertheless, dot persisted.

“they don’t know what they’re missing!” she would say when she didn’t get a callback for the school’s play.

yakko and wakko would say the same when dot went too long without hearing back from one of the more prestigious auditions. she wouldn’t acknowledge their words. maybe she was just that unbothered… or something else.

when she first brought up wanting to get back into entertainment, dot wanted her brothers there with her, so they could be a trio. yakko and wakko declined this request, so dot didn’t listen to anything they had to say regarding that topic from that point on.

he didn’t know his brother’s reasoning behind staying out of show business, but yakko’s reason was that there was simply no time. if he wasn’t working during the day, he was helping his siblings with school work in the afternoon (their grades were not up to par), making calls to get dot more auditions in the evening (that’s only if she gets good grades), or doing the ride sharing job on the weekends because the landlord decided to raise the rent for some godforsaken reason. 

yakko rarely had time to himself, you could say this was why he liked driving so much. sure, comically zooming around and spontaneously popping out of people’s pockets and desk drawers was endlessly fun, but there was something about driving. the solitude he would have hated a few years ago was peacefully prominent every time he dropped the siblings off at school, and he took his first sigh of relief for the day.

dot’s playlist was still playing through the speakers. yakko had made his own copy for his own listening needs and - between you and him - he also wanted to have something of his siblings for when they were gone.

that, and taylor swift was just… she was definitely someone who would have received many unwarranted kisses from yakko and wakko once upon a time. 

_“and when you are young they assume you know nothing…”_

“hm, you got that right, swifty,” yakko said in response.

it was a little tune about lost romance and thinking about the past. but yakko didn’t think about romance with very specific parts of this song. the events that led up to his current life started to play in his head, and he wasn’t exactly focused on driving anymore.

_“i knew you’d haunt all of my what-if’s, the smell of smoke would hang around this long…”_

putting toons in the human world changes those toons.

a prime example would be yakko warner. yakko doesn’t sing as much as he used to. if he does, it’s usually to the songs he hears at work, or whatever dot plays in the car. yakko used to be able to think up new songs on the fly, but in the last couple years it’s felt like his brain pushed out old skills to make room for new ones. (the siblings also lost interest in improvising songs - a sign that the human world was also taking away their zaniness.)

_“...’cause i knew everything when i was young…”_

putting toons in the human world with nothing but the clothes on their backs and their very last less-than-pleasant checks really pisses off said toons. especially after promises of being set up with a new place to live and no worries about bills were made. of course it was just a ploy. they should have known.

yakko should have known. he had an eye for detecting a steaming pile of crap. but things were moving so fast, plotz had stepped down and the new guy was making new changes, starting with the warners. new guy talked about renovating the water tower and “temporarily” moving the warners into the real world while they made those renovations.

_“i knew i’d curse you for the longest time”_

those pesky execs and that new chairman. yakko had half a mind to visit that guy and introduce him to the mallet. his name is on the fucking company and all he gets is a hundred bucks plus some dirt as a departure gift?

_“chasing shadows in my grocery line, i knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired”_

gee, this artist does not pull her punches! the lyrics and a memory dropped on yakko’s head like a fucking anvil.

wakko thought he saw ol scratchy at the store. ever so kind as he was, he went to say hi, while yakko and dot looked the other way. thank god it wasn’t actually him.

_“and you’d be standing on my front porch li-“_

“yeah, no you lost me,” yakko said, waving her off like she was actually in the car. 

no one was busting their butts to find yakko and his siblings and beg them to come back to the water tower. no one was missing them. he certainly wasn’t missing anyone over there. 

the song was almost over but yakko changed it anyway. same artist, same melancholy atmosphere, different tune. 

same lost romance topic, different meaning to this warner.

it’s been five years, and last the warners heard was that their beloved tower had been demolished. aside from plotting revenge schemes, yakko had to really step up and make a new home from nothing. but this was the human world, and he couldn’t _literally_ make something from nothing. now he was so busy he couldn’t even think about sending an anvil to the folks at warner bros. 

look at this idiot, who had to find a place for himself and his siblings to live, as well as a way to pay for it. look at this idiot, who was now working at a freaking target, having to let go of some of his zaniness in order to keep said job, because if he let out even one of his snarky sarcastic thoughts to a customer, he loses. he can call it self defense, he can say the customer threatened him, but he will still lose his job and by extent, risk losing his siblings. all because some fool in a business suit lied to him and made him, yakko, the fool.

not only was it the new ceo of warner bros, but scratchy too. that was a pretty low blow to all three warners. ol scratchansniff was in on it too, and he reassured the warners that everything would be okay, that they would come back to the lot. during their last interaction, he told them his job was put on the line and he couldn’t risk that. said they wouldn’t understand because they never truly worked in their lives. because they don’t know what it means to lose.

_“don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby, look at this godforsaken mess that you’ve made me, you showed me colors you know i can’t see with anyone else”_

yakko knew that he and his siblings were difficult with scratchy sometimes but they’d never lie to him like that. never in a million years.

he thought about this at least once a week and at most once a day. he thought about it when he had a string of special friends at work, that he could still be living on the lot without worry of bills and aging if only he hadn’t been so naive. he thought about it when one of his sibling’s friend’s parents gave him a look of pity. _oh to be so young and have to be a parent to your brother and sister._ when he had to go to this “back to school night” nonsense and get the same looks from their teachers.

_“don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby, look at this idiotic fool that you’ve made me…”_

he didn’t feel like a parent… most of the time. wakko and dot pretty much looked after themselves when he wasn’t around. they knew how to dress themselves, when to eat, and when to go to bed. they were still figuring out other ways of solving problems aside from the mallet or the anvil. other than that, the three of them functioned just fine as individuals. someone just had to bring the income and only yakko was legally allowed to do so.

he had to. he didn’t know what else to do. causing a drizzle of anvils on the warner bros lot wouldn’t pay the rent or the utilities. fourteen year old yakko would have known what to do in this situation, and it would have been fun and zany and there would be no fears of losing two very important people in his life.

he really did know everything when he was young.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i can leave this as is or i can maybe shit out something abt how their first five years off the lot went? maybe i could incorporate more tarot references in places other than the summary? haha lmk✨


	2. you're not my homeland anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mildly tipsy authors note: its nov 5 where i am. wot the fook. lich rally wot the hap is fuckening. henny gays, listened to several break up songs n other sad songs to shit this thing out.
> 
> exile - taylor swift  
> 

**year 1**

“nothing says home sweet home like prison bars!” yakko said, tapping his finger on the window, observing the steel pipes.

“and padlocks, too,” wakko added, pointing at the latch on the door that was locking them in the room.

it was just the two of them, the only boys inhabiting this home. the girls were in another room down the hall, probably locked in as well. to say that this wasn’t where the warners expected to be on a hot tuesday night was an understatement. they had originally started the day by going to various auditions, try to get back to the industry that they were thrown out of. but the casting director on their last audition realized _wait these are unaccompanied minors_ and made a phone call.

some woman in a tacky pantsuit collected the warners, took them to her office, and after many questions, she took them to this home. there were other kids their ages that didn’t have parents either, but it was easy to tell that that was where the common ground began and ended.

the owners of the home weren’t too bad. they knew how to cook (wakko had third helpings) and they promised the warners and the other kids that this would be their ‘last home’ before ‘getting adopted.’

it was nice to finally eat some real food and have a nice shower. but yakko could speak for himself and his siblings when he said he had absolutely no interest in getting parents. in all honesty, adults were pretty shitty. they held all the power and it wasn’t fair. in the face of children, adults seemed to develop this superiority complex, like they were the only ones worthy of thoughts or opinions. yakko didn’t want to take that anymore.

“do you think- are you talking to yourself?” wakko asked, snapping his brother out of his own head.

“huh? probably?” yakko replied, turning away from the window. “what was the first question?”

wakko tilted his head, staring in confusion for a moment. then, “do you think dot’s okay in the other room?”

“please, she can handle anything! she’ll probably like talking to the other girls!”

right on cue, a flurry of high pitched screams sounded through the wall. then, there was frantic banging on the door down the hall and frantic pleas to be let out. yakko and wakko quickly went over and pressed their ears on the door.

they could hear the foster parents footsteps, keys jingling, and then the screams filled the hallway. finally, came dot’s innocent voice.

“they said they wanted to see my pet…”

and that’s how all three warners got kicked out of their first group home. well, it was only supposed to be dot, but her brothers refused to be separated, so they went with her.

it only took one more home for the warners to realize that they would much rather live on the streets of los angeles. they weren’t legally allowed to be on their own without a guardian in this world, but when have they ever listened to any figure of authority?

besides, running around in a big city was tons more fun than the confinement of a movie lot. the tall buildings were a maze to get lost in, and it made it harder for the police to find them. lots of potential hiding places. lots of potential sleeping spots. lots of opportunities to find food.

this would be easier if they hadn’t been exiled to the human world. this world came with so many rules and requirements. they heard of plenty of toons who led full lives here, but that clearly wasn’t going to be the case for yakko, wakko, and dot.

those other toons who were able to make it here weren’t so toony and annoying every waking moment. perhaps that’s why they lived so quietly.

that thought wasn’t so bothersome until maybe the fourth or fifth day the warners were out on their own. 

**year 2**

maybe they were being dramatic for going on foot. maybe it was their only option. or maybe they were prolonging the inevitable truth. or perhaps they were still broke, homeless, and without any method of transportation. they’ll never tell you. 

“do you see it?” dot asked in between quick breaths through her sprint. “is it still there?”

“i don’t see it!” wakko frantically replied, running alongside her.

yakko couldn’t say anything. his lungs were on fire and he was trying with all his might to visualize what he so wanted to see in the distance. _it has to be there, it has to be…_

they slowed down across the street from the entrance gates, panting and panicking. yakko bent a little, hands on his knees as he tried to ground himself. he couldn’t properly assess the view if his head was spinning.

“it’s not there!” wakko’s voice wavered. “it’s gone!”

“no!” dot was not having it. “you just can’t see because you’re short! let me stand on your head!”

yakko heard the shuffling and the struggling, but he didn’t stand up straight again until it was quiet. he looked at dot, who was wobbling on top of her brother’s head, and shielding her eyes as she looked out at the sunset.

“wakko hold still! i can’t see when you’re moving so much!”

“it’s harder to do this in this world!”

“just give me five seconds! wait- _wait…”_ dot paused and then slowly put her hands back to her sides. “it’s not there… the tower’s gone… whoa - _wakko! ahhh!”_

wakko lost his balance, causing him and his sister to tumble backwards. yakko all but dove to break their fall, and ended up with both siblings crash landing onto him. they landed on the ground in a pile, yakko taking the biggest hit on the back of his head.

“oof... everyone okay?” he asked, trying to shake the daze in his eyes.

dot rolled off her brother, followed by wakko. the latter sat up and brought his knees to his chest, facing the lot.

“so that’s it then?”

yakko finally sat up as well, moving to sit in between his younger siblings. sitting on the ground meant that they couldn’t see the sunset anymore, but it didn’t matter. they saw what had to be seen, and it was gut wrenching. the only home they ever had… the place they were promised they’d return to… gone. demolished. 

the sun was completely down within minutes, and the warners remained where they were. their entire world was already flipped upside down by just getting kicked out, but this was a whole new level of destruction.

all they could do was watch as the security guard prepared to close the guard house. it wasn’t ralph. maybe he was played like a violin and lost his job too.

dot looked down, tears welling up in her eyes. she sniffled and wiped her nose, and felt the hand of her eldest brother rub her back. as a single tear fell off her face and to the asphalt, she noticed something shiny.

five coins scattered in the gutter. the only nickel in the bunch caught the teardrop. even in the face of devastation, dot picked the coins up and put them in her pocket. maybe she and her brothers will find a vending machine in a parking garage for breakfast.

**year 3**

“sorry, kiddos,” said the less-than-potential landlord. “unless one of you is turning eighteen tomorrow, you can’t be a tenant here.”

“look we have no business becoming time lords,” yakko replied. “we just need a place to live.”

“and amy rose has her own apartment!” dot tried to argue. “she’s only twelve!”

“yeah, her group of toons are allowed to freely roam around, why not us?” wakko added.

“i can’t speak for that particular case, but here in california, you have to meet the legal age requirement,” the landlord told them. he shuffled the paperwork back into a neat stack and handed it back to yakko. “everything else looks fine. you got good income, a clean record, you just need to wait a few more months.”

a few months will be four years since the warners officially left the movie lot. it was brought up every year, and he was hoping that the memory of that event could be replaced with a better one, like finding their own home.

they left that office, disgruntled. if this was a cartoon, they would annoy the landlord until he caved. or wakko would pull a completely furnished house from his gag bag, or six swords, two for each sibling to properly fight this. it was that simple. 

“what do we do now?” asked dot.

“i’m hungry,” wakko said.

“our next order of business is to find some food!” yakko announced.

“what about the home?” dot asked. “aren’t they making dinner?”

“please, not even wakko could hold down that mystery casserole.”

“fair point.”

it took until sundown for the three of them to travel into town via bus and walk. yakko paid for a cheap pizza that tasted like cardboard, but it was way better than what their current foster parents usually cooked up. 

it had been a year since he got his job at (the starbucks in) target and he still felt a proud rush everytime he inserted his debit card into the machine. he was saving up a majority of his earnings, but since he and the sibs were out for most of the afternoon, he decided to reat them... even if it was suspicious tasting pizza. he didn't know abouthis siblings, but yakko was just happy to have some form of stability again.

they made it back to the group home after dark, and their foster parents didn’t seem that bothered. they just counted the amount of kids they were supposed to be housing and left it at that.

the next day went a little differently. yakko may have made up a little ditty about having to cover someone’s opening shift at (the starbucks in the) target, so he missed that morning’s homeschooling lesson. but he didn’t go to work. instead, he continued his search for an apartment. yeah, he was still seventeen but he was also technically somewhere between sixty and eight five, did that count for anything in this world? he was working diligently, and had money saved up. he knew how to be responsible.

he told just as much to this new landlord. she merely listened until he was finished, and then she leaned forward to speak.

“sweetheart,” she began, holding her hands together on her desk, “do you know why no one will rent to you, other than the fact that you’re underage?”

yakko tilted his head. “that’s all anyone’s ever told me.”

“i know who you are, mr. warner,” the landlord went on.

“sure you do, i just gave you my entire life on a few pieces of paper.”

“i mean, i have kids who used to watch you and your siblings on tv.”

“oh…” the show felt like someone else’s life whenever he thought about it. a lot of times it didn’t even feel real. “so…?”

“you’ve built a reputation,” the landlord told him, “even if it’s not on any kind of paper document. i’m honestly surprised you have the job you do. there aren’t a lot of companies and landlords that want three destructive kids on their property, i’m sure you’ve already discovered that.”

“i’m too much of a toon,” yakko clarified, standing from his seat, “too hard to control. i get it.”

he was only in that office for a few minutes, but he left feeling like it had been another lifetime.

**year 4**

“it’s not much,” yakko said to his siblings as he pulled the single silver key from his pocket.

“but…?” wakko trailed off.

“that was it. here it is, siblings!” he unlocked the door and opened it, revealing a rather bland and dinky apartment.

it was unfurnished, apart from the refrigerator and stove in the kitchen. yakko realized he didn’t know how to cook, nor his siblings. but now they could learn. there was a lot of opportunity and potential in this shitty little apartment. he just had to bring it out somehow.

dot was the first to step over the threshold, quietly examining the area. wakko followed tentatively, but still a bit optimistic. he did a slow three sixty in the living room, getting every little detail, while dot swiftly went to look through the two bedrooms. 

“you’re right,” she said went she stepped back out to the living room. “it’s not much. are we sharing bedrooms?”

“you ask like you don’t want to share bedrooms,” yakko told her, placing his hands on his hips.

“where are we going to sit?” wakko asked, and then he went over to the kitchen. “and what are we going to eat?”

“we’ll empty our pockets and see what we can build,” yakko replied, trying to stay hyped up. “c’mon, i know you guys must have _something_ in those deep pockets of yours!” (that and he only had enough money left for groceries.) “and we’ll go to the store once you guys are done looking around!”

wakko and dot shared a look. a couple years ago they would have been ecstatic. they would have been ecstatic now had they not succumbed to one of the human world’s many curses: aging. they were teenagers now, the epitome of 14 and 13. angsty teens being angsty and refusing to look at the bright side because it’s not what _they_ want. yakko didn’t quite understand, even though he was also quite angry and frustrated through his teens. the siblings didn’t have to know that, though.

“we have a home now!” he told them. “no more sleeping on sidewalks or park benches! no more group homes! no more fearing that we’ll be separated! it’s too new right now, but once we have this place decorated, it’ll be a brand new start!”

then dot sighed. she went over to the window and looked out at the view of the parking lot. “well… we’re on the second floor, so it feels a little like the water tower.”

wakko perked up at that. “you’re right! we’re still up in the air!”

none of them had brought up the tower in weeks, maybe months. yakko was hoping they were finally past that, but he had to admit that he still thought about it too. it’s hard to forget your first home when it was your only home.

“we’ll make it better than the tower,” yakko promised. “remember, we were forced into the tower. but this place?” he slapped the doorway. “we picked it ourselves!”

“no, _you_ picked it,” wakko said. “me and dot put it in our top 3.”

“and it was number three,” dot added.

“well, ᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰ i already signed the lease, so we’re here for a whole year, maybe more!”

they weren’t swayed by that, so yakko let them be. it’s not like they could just find another place, anyways.

**year 5**

becoming a functional member of human society was incredibly mundane once all the chaos of settling in was over. yakko hadn’t seen so much paperwork since the warner bros contracts. not to mention, he had a lawyer at the time to help him go over all the boring details. at least all those sessions of signing and initialing led to making really great entertainment. all this paperwork would only lead to wakko and dot being able to attend public school.

yakko wanted to consider himself lucky that he aged out of the school system, but that was only because he spent most of his teens struggling to live, so what can ya do? wakko and dot, on the other hand, had no choice but to experience school outside of the private tutoring sessions they used to have both at the lot and in a few of the group homes. it was time for high school, and that came with a lot of forms to be filled out by the legal guardian.

“emergency contact?” yakko read off the yellow paper, clicking the pen in his hand. “‘in case the parent/legal guardian can’t be contacted…’ huh.”

he sat back at the table and wracked his brain. for the first time in ages, yakko had to think about his connections outside of the people living in this apartment. who could he trust with his siblings if he wasn’t around? wakko and dot knew how to handle themselves, and they knew what to do in an emergency. if their time on the lot didn’t teach them anything, then the last five years certainly did. not to mention, having to think about his siblings in situations where he couldn’t save them and they couldn’t save themselves wasn’t exactly pleasant.

the foster parents of their last group home weren’t exactly reliable. not to mention, yakko didn’t keep their contact information after leaving due to the fact that they made it very difficult for him to adopt his siblings. 

throwing that thought to the bin, yakko moved on to people he knew now. he had coworkers, he spoke to them and had banter with them. but none of them had ever met his siblings. yakko briefly thought of annalise… they were friends, but he couldn’t see her picking up wakko and dot from school if a meteor suddenly struck.

when was the last time yakko knew someone who would take care of his siblings? he knew the answer, he wasn’t that stupid. he just didn’t like the feeling that he still might if things worked themselves out. scratchy had a hand in screwing the warners over. he lied to them just as much as the other execs did.

_and he was our p-psychiatrist. p-psychiatrists aren’t supposed to do things like that. he was someone we looked up to, even if we’d never say it to his face. and he knew that too. it was an unspoken thing, and that’s what was so special about us. he could have at least tried to find us when we got kicked._

“earth to yakko!” called dot’s shrill voice.

yakko shook his head like he was rebooting his mind and landed eyes on his brother and sister, who were sat beside him at the table.

“you were doing that thing again,” wakko said, “where you quietly talk to yourself.”

“sorry ‘bout that,” yakko replied, focusing on the form in front of him again. 

dot put a different form down next to him. “this one’s about granting us permission to use the computers and the internet at school.”

wakko brought forth another. “this one is to grant us free lunch since we’re poor.”

“alright, alright, let me just…” yakko wrote down the contact information on the yellow form. “what are the odds, anyway?” he mumbled, and he put that piece of paper aside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so theres a lot of things i purposefully left untied, partly bc my brain doesnt work all the time and partly for whomst ever is reading to decide what they wanna see come next. also there more tarot card references sprinkled in there, will i elaborate? whos to say? also who the fyuck is this annalise person??? whos. to. say. (i am. but like. im shy.)(i might post things abt this on tumblr [hilariouslyedgy] so uh. give me the follow or somethin.)


	3. left my shoes in the street

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> clementine - halsey
> 
> cw: anxiety/panic attack descriptions

it was an odd but terrifying feeling. he felt his throat dry up and shrink, and something deep in his gut told him to come out from behind the counter, the space was too cramped all of a sudden. his heart was threatening to beat out of his chest, but not in the way it used to when he laid eyes on a pretty blonde. it was strange; at first yakko was listening to kathy the supervisor talk about something and then his ears were ringing.

he stood at the little half door at the end of the bar, right next to the display case of pastries. for a few seconds at a time, he could catch his breath and calm down, but then the pang of fear would strike his chest again. he could probably power through it, he just needed a distraction. at the same time, yakko felt like he would be unable to write a customer's order on a clear plastic cup; his hands were starting to shake.

“yakko!” called his coworker, james. he was standing in front of the toon, much taller and much more intimidating. “dude, can i get by?”

“he’s been like that for a few minutes,” said angie, the other barista. she was apart of what kathy was talking about earlier. her voice sounded very far away, like she was at the end of a tunnel.

yakko tried to remember what was happening and what they were talking about but his brain was fogging up. his mind always moved fast, but this time it was going so fast he couldn’t keep up. he wanted to speak but it was stuck in his throat and his chest, which was only getting tighter by the second. something was seriously wrong here.

he mumbled something to his coworkers about taking a fifteen and then bolted out of the mini coffee shop. normally, he would sit in the back where all their coffee storage was, but it was so small yakko feared it might crush him to death, so he went to the next place his brain thought of: the target stock room.

his body was doing the motions, like a puppet on a string. if there was any toon left in him, yakko’s spirit would probably be floating out of his physical form, and that probably wouldn’t be a good look for the company.

next thing he knew, yakko was in the stock room, sitting on the floor against one of the shelves. he was almost certain he knocked a stack of shoeboxes over in his frenzy to claim sanctuary, but his brain and heart wouldn’t stop. his heart wasn’t slowing down, and nor was his breathing. he wanted to curl into himself but jump out of his own skin at the same time. he frantically scratched at his arm and rubbed at his chest, and he wasn’t sure why.

_what the hell is happening? is this what human death feels like?_

the clicking sound of the door opening shouldn’t have startled him, but he couldn’t help the sound that came out of him. who was about to see him in such a bizarre state?

thankfully, the voice was familiar. deep, female, and familiar.

“yakko? your super told me you were back here. come on, you know you’re the only one who-“ she came around the corner to where the toon in question was sitting and stopped in her tracks.

she wasn’t one of his fellow baristas. she was a store cashier. she was the one who pushed the uniform boundaries, always wearing chokers and dark lipstick and dark eyeliner. if she was a toon, she may have ended up as a punchline in an animaniacs episode.

but she wasn’t. she was a friend, and a very concerned one at the moment. she went over and squatted down in front of yakko.

“you good?” she asked, watching him carefully. “your brain feeling scattered?”

“that’s, that’s…” yakko swallowed the lump in his throat as he brought his knees to his chest. “it’s one… one way to-“ his voice caught in his throat. _oh no. i’ll never be able to speak again._ “annie, i think i’m dying…” _oh thank god._

“no, i don’t think you are.”

“wh - how can you -“ he coughed and wheezed. if his soul wasn’t leaving his body, it certainly felt like it. “no, no - not gonna make it - m-my sibs-“

“yakko,” annalise flores firmly said. “you are not dying. you just feel a little dark and twisty inside, and it makes your body react certain ways. you just need to put all your focus on something that isn’t your staggering breath or the numbness in your hands.”

_how did she know about the numbness? does she know my head is spinning too?_

“okay, um…” annalise thought for a moment. “okay! walking me through making my usual!”

the usual… that’s easy… yakko could visualize standing behind the counter, venti size cup in hand. it was just hard to get the words out of his mouth. he had never been so speechless before.

“i - the…” he squeezed his eyes shut in frustration.

“take your time, it’s okay.” and annalise had never sounded so soft spoken before. for someone with that much eyeliner and spiky jewelry, yakko would have never expected her to sit with him like this.

there’s still decent people in the world. that confirmation was the first step to get him back to reality.

“ice…” he finally choked out.

“yeah, keep going.”

“mango flavoring…” he could barely hear himself, but annalise didn’t seem to mind. “lemonade… dragon fruit pieces…”

annalise nodded and grinned. “imma be real with you chief, i don’t actually know if that’s actually how it’s made, but it sounds about right.”

yakko stayed quiet. he felt less “dark and twisty,” as his friend had put it. but he still didn’t feel like himself. there was still a weight on his chest and it made him feel weird, detached even. he knew annalise was still sitting in front of him but he forgot about her until she made a sound.

“hm?”

he couldn’t meet her gaze, but he hummed back.

“you were saying something…haiti?”

“jamaica… peru…” he trailed off, struggling to put himself back together. he just couldn’t remember what came next, and his eyes widened.

to his surprise, annalise continued for him.

“republic dominican, cuba, caribbean…”

“greenland, el salvador too…”

it was much slower than it was supposed to be but it was helping. it was something deeply ingrained in the ink he was drawn in. it brought him back down to earth.

soon enough he was breathing evenly again, and his heart slowed down. he was still trembling, but things were starting to clear up.

“well, annie-banannie,” he said softly, “i think the worst of it’s over.”

“good,” she replied. “glad you’re not dead.”

“could i have died?”

“no, oh my god! i-“ she paused and then touched her earpiece. her own boss was probably wondering where she was.

now that yakko was back on this planet, he could think again. how much time had passed since he holed himself up in here? 

“i’m helping another worker,” annalise said into the little mic on her wire. she listened to the response and then she rolled her eyes. “okay, well jake never breaks me on time either, so he can wait an extra five minutes.”

“there’s annie the hardass,” yakko said. “it’s weird seeing you be anything but.”

“just because i wear this much eyeliner doesn’t mean i can’t be nice,” she replied. “really though, are you okay? it’s weird seeing you be anything but a wisecracking smartass.”

out of everyone in this overhyped retailer, yakko got along with annalise the most. she talked back to her asshole manager (and pretty much everybody), she appreciated his jokes, and she gracefully accept any nickname he threw her way. she normally chewed out anyone who called her annie.

“yeah, this has never happened before,” he said at last.

“what? your anxiety attack?”

“there’s a name for it?”

annalise raised her eyebrows. “oh… oh, my boy. have you never experienced anxiety before that moment?”

yakko scratched his head. he’s heard the term before in the past, but he never applied it to himself. he was always occupied by something else, like filming a tv show or trying to find something to eat so his siblings wouldn’t starve. 

“good question.”

annalise seemed surprised. “i mean i’d tell you all about it, but my super is yelling in my ear as we speak.”

“well, go on, get outta here,” yakko told her. “i need to be getting back too.”

“okay. well, let me know if you feel all dark and twisty again.”

they left the stock room and then went their separate ways. yakko was very aware of himself and his surroundings now. he was aware of how strangely okay he felt again. well, he was physically exhausted and his limbs were weak as if he had gone running. but mentally? the memory of anxiety attack was already fading. it was like trying to remember a dream… or living on the streets. it was like watching someone else’s life. it was stressful, no doubt about it, but he couldn’t feel the phantom chest pain or hand tingles. the weirdest thing was that he couldn’t even remember why he got so choked up and anxious in the first place.

he returned to his post with a smile on his face, like he hadn’t just lost his grip on reality for twenty to thirty minutes. there wasn’t a line at the register this time, so kathy the supervisor was casually standing behind the counter with the other baristas, angie and james. they all turned to look at yakko, abruptly pausing their conversation.

“what’d i miss?” he asked.

“a group of karens,” replied angie, who had her arms folded, clearly annoyed she was left on her own to make drinks by herself.

kathy suddenly stepped in. “okay, now that the whole squad’s here, we can continue. as i said before warner made his dramatic exit, we’re gonna start packing up shop on friday. then, our starbucks will be closing one week from then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wasn’t gonna post this at all. but i was talkin headcanons with some pals in a discord server and it made me dislike this chapter less enough to where i feel ok sharing it. so here it is. I might come back and make some changes tho. next one will be a little more fun! and hopefully it’ll come sooner!


	4. breakdown or blackout

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> clementine - halsey (again)
> 
> cw: drinking/alcohol

“stop being such a dad,” annalise reminded her friend as she stopped the car in front of an unfamiliar apartment complex. “you’ve looked at your phone a million times since i picked you up, and i know it’s not because you’re simping over someone.”

yakko scoffed, he didn’t like being referred to as a parent. “i get around, i just don’t talk about it.”

“yeah, the hearts that fly over your head say it all.”

he looked at annalise, surprised. he thought he outgrew that trait. did that happen every time he talked to someone he liked?

“i’m kidding.” annalise grinned. “you just spend a lot of time juggling your jobs and raising your kids.”

“sibs,” yakko corrected. “besides, ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ i just never left them alone when i-“

annalise cut him off. “you told them to study while you’re going to a party. and partying, in your head, doesn’t have any benefits, whereas driving for lyft on a saturday night in los angeles gets you money, which benefits all three of you. you feel guilty because you’re not using this time to work in order to better your siblings’ lives.”

“you really pay attention in psychology school, don’t you?” 

“dude, this is just how i talk to my friends. but yes, i do and i’m passing with flying colors.” she paused. “taking care of yourself also means having fun every now and again. thought you of all people would have known that.”

he did know that. except back then it was all fun and little work, and that was just because his job was fun and his siblings were in on it. things were wildly different now. yakko warner from 1993 was long gone… so was yakko warner from five years ago, now that he was thinking about it.

“well, i’m here, aren’t i?” he said at last. 

annalise was grinning one again. “yes, and you’re acting like a nineteen year old tonight whether you like it or not.”

so he followed her into some random person’s apartment. it was random to yakko, but to annalise it was a coworker she had her own heart eyes for, shawn. yakko had seen annalise talk to shawn before, and it was one of the few times she wasn’t so broody. 

“welcome guys, make yourselves at home,” shawn greeted as he let the human and the toon in his apartment.

this guy, while so wildly handsome it could make anyone’s head spin, was very different from annalise. now that yakko could see everyone out of the usual red uniform, it was easier to see the type of people he hung out with at work. while annalise was decked out in a little black dress with fishnets, shawn was in some obscure band t-shirt and jeans; two different energies. angie and james were there too, and they dressed as regular anybodies blending into the crowd. it was really annalise’s goth attire and yakko’s toon self that stood out the most.

the party was already in full swing. drinks were being made, slices of pizza were being passed around among other things. music was bumping, and annalise was already chatting up her guy.

yakko was starting to feel good about this. people liked him, and he liked people.

~

“we’re studying,” dot sang as she flipped through the pages in her notebook. “gonna ace these exams, woo!”

she and wakko were sat on the floor in the living room, notes and textbooks spread out on the coffee table. they had promised yakko they would show proof of studying when he returned from his shindig, and in return they’d get starbucks for breakfast the next day. 

neither of them had any qualms about yakko going out for fun while they stayed behind. usually, either wakko or dot or both would be leaving to stay at a friend’s house on the weekend, while yakko spent the nights driving random people around downtown, sometimes even out of town. it was a nice change for everyone. for once, wakko and dot had the place to themselves.

on top of that, dot didn’t want to spend the night at stupid chessie’s house this weekend. actually, dot never wanted to see chessie again. it’s crazy how fast things change with your so-called friends.

“studying, studying,” she sang, catching herself getting lost in thought.

wakko was focused, though. well, he was trying really hard to balance a pencil on his nose, so at least he was focused on something. when the pencil fell and landed in his lap for the umpteenth time, he looked at his sister.

“you wanna get something from the gas station?”

“thought you’d never ask,” dot replied, immediately shutting her history book. “how much money you got?”

“uh, i think i have some left over from lunch yesterday.” he reached into his pocket and pulled out some cash and change. “we’re really gonna do this?”

he and his sister knew they weren’t allowed to leave the apartment while yakko was gone but… what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him. the ampm was walking distance from where they lived, and it’s not like they hadn’t walked there before. sure the sun was up during those other times, but they’ve been out in the dark before… for months at a time.

together, wakko and dot had fifteen dollars. that was enough to make some damage at the convenience store down the street, so they grabbed their jackets and their shoes and bolted out of the apartment.

~

yakko shook his whole body and whooped at the burning sensation running through his insides. some of the other partygoers were downing a chaser following their shots. annalise was sucking on a lemon given to her by shawn. he offered one to yakko too, to which he declined.

“man, what a savage,” shawn told him, seeming impressed.

“i’ve had worse things in my mouth,” yakko replied.

several people laughed, making him feel good. accomplished, even. these were his people.

_are they, though? how many of these twenty somethings lived on the streets and raise their siblings as a result of adults lying to them consistently?_

_okay, let’s not think about that right now._

yakko found himself sat on the couch, talking up a storm with angie and james. he periodically looked around for annalise, just to make sure she was still enjoying herself. he hardly checked his phone.

~

“hiding is so boring,” wakko quietly said, leaning against the back wall, arms full with snacks.

he and dot we’re attempting to hide in plain sight under the covered parking spaces. it was bad enough that some shady looking old man followed the siblings to the convenience store, and it was worse that they heard a gunshot in one of the nearby neighborhoods on the way back. now they got a visit from the social worker.

luckily, every space in the covered lot was taken, so hiding between two vehicles while keeping an eye on their front door was fairly easy. all they had to do was make sure the social worker could see that no one was home.

of course a string of ideas went through both their heads upon seeing the man in a suit walking up the stairs towards their apartment. from planting an anvil to getting into disguises in order to ward him off, wakko and dot so badly wanted to resort to the fun way to resolve this problem. however doing what they wanted would accidentally result in murder, so they settled with hiding.

yes, wakko and dot were more than capable of being alone for a few hours without parental supervision but a cps agent wasn’t going to buy that. they were still underage and required the legal guardian to be with them at all times. but lots of teens were left home alone, and their parents never faced the threat of losing their parenting rights.

“i thought they were letting up with the visits,” wakko said.

“me too,” dot replied. “i thought that it was only going to be one visit after stupid chessie’s mom called them.” she rolled her eyes thinking about the girl that used to sit with her at lunch. last month, her even stupider mom called cps after only meeting yakko once when he gave chessie a ride home after school, deciding that he was too young to be taking care of two kids.

it’s not like he didn’t have enough to worry about. besides, dot was pretty much done with that gross scary feeling that she could just get separated from her family in the blink of an eye. and she wasn’t a kid, she was almost fifteen. she and wakko were able to look after themselves.

she took her eyes off the front door at the sound of crinkling cellophane. wakko was opening his family size bag of chips.

“do you want him to see us?” she hissed. “be quiet!”

“i’m hungry!”

“well, right now you’re wakko!”

they both trailed their eyes back to their apartment landing. they could see the man walking back down the stairs. he was scanning the parking lot as well but didn’t show any signs of making extra stops on his way out.

wakko and dot shifted slightly so they were directly in front of a large white SUV and squatted down so they were out of the man’s line of vision. only thing is, they couldn’t see him either.

“hold this,” wakko said as he handed his soda, chips, and popcorn to his sister. then, he lied down on the ground and crawled underneath the SUV.

“what are you doing?” dot asked.

“this way, i can see when he’s gone!” 

and he continued crawling until he was at the other end of the vehicle. he slowly stuck his head out from underneath, only far enough so his eyes were out. he watched the road and saw the figure of the man head towards the large orange gates. he didn’t look back, but wakko kept watching until he was out of sight.

“okay, he’s - oof!” wakko had flipped over on his back and tried to sit up, only to hit his forehead on the bumper of the SUV. he dropped his head back down, blinking in surprise.

that was enough confirmation for dot to come out from the other end of the vehicle. she looked down at her disoriented brother, wondering how she got to be the youngest.

“so do we tell yakko about this?” she asked.

“we’d have to tell him we left the apartment,” wakko replied as he rubbed his forehead. then he reached up towards his sister.

she was about to give him a hand to get back up, but he waved her away and pointed at the bag of chips she was holding. dot gave him that instead, and he inhaled the whole thing, bag and all.

~

yakko was still coherent but he couldn’t quite remember his own name after the fourth shot. he felt great, better than he had in years. so far, he lost three rounds of jenga, danced with a pretty stranger, and then lost again at jenga. he was standing in the hallway, vibing to the music while holding annalise’s drink while she was in the bathroom.

she had been hitting it off with shawn, as she had been telling yakko on their way to the bathroom. but she still trusted him and not shawn to hold her drink for now. 

“hey, man.” speak of the devil. the tall man emerged from the crowd, still managing to look undeniably handsome as he tried not to run into anyone. he reached for the cup in yakko’s hand. “i can take that for-“

“nope!” yakko immediately said, a dopey smile on his face. his hand remained on top of the red solo cup.

“but i-“

“hey, if you want a drink i’ll get you one myself.” yakko winked.

luckily, shawn wasn’t that persistent. he chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. the awkward silence didn’t stay too long, though; annalise came out of the bathroom not long after.

she paused at the doorway looking between the toon and the human.

“oh, my boys,” she mused as she took her drink from yakko.

all three of them ventured back out to the living room and found a spot on the couch. yakko was about ready to intently melt into the cushion, but then a very familiar song started to bump through the speakers.

annalise let out a laugh and nudged yakko with her elbow.

“oh-“ shawn sat up immediately. “someone must have hijacked my playlist, dude, i’m sorry-“

yakko waved it off, noticing the amount of eyes that went his way. “come on, guys!”

that prompted several partygoers to enthusiastically egg him on.

“those days are behind me!”

annalise tapped his shoulder. she seemed to have pulled another shot glass out of nowhere, calling it liquid courage.

yakko didn’t exactly need it, but he took it anyway.

“i don’t even remember all the- paraguayuraguaysurinameandfrenchguianabarbadosandguam-“

everyone cheered as he stood up. yakko couldn’t quite remember what happened after that.

~

“ducktales!” wakko sang, followed by a belch. “woo-oo!”

what? just because they’re a different company doesn’t mean they can’t enjoy other cartoons!

“i heard the original nephews moved to the human world,” dot said when the opening theme passed. “those are different ducks entirely. same scrooge and donald, though. they just had to go through a massive makeover.”

“weird,” wakko replied. “didn’t know they could do that.”

“it’s like replacing a band member,” dot said with a shrug. “it’s easy to find look-a-likes in this town. imagine they did that with one of us back then.”

“it wouldn’t have been the same if one of us was missing.”

dot paused. “that’s not the point i was trying to make, you big softie. but you’re right.”

“would you wanna go back if they offered us a reboot?”

“after the way they kicked us out? no. i’ll find something better eventually.”

“but what if we got an offer before you found something?”

dot didn’t say anything. she could work faster than warner bros, and that’s if they even wanted the siblings back. she could go to more auditions and build up her connections all over again. so far, she got into a clothing catalog and did a voice over for some toy commercial. sure, not many big name studios wanted a washed up 90s cartoon star, but dot warner was going to make it somehow. she did it once, she most certainly can do it again.

“well, you and yakko said you didn’t want to get back into the business, so,” she finally responded. 

“i think i would if it was animaniacs,” wakko said in thought. “there’s just nothing like it.”

the two of them continued watching the triplets wreak havoc in their great uncle’s mansion, but neither were really paying attention anymore.

~

the night reached the point where everyone was cursing out the things they hated and drank to it. so far it was “fuck capitalism” from annalise, “fuck mom and dad for not supporting my dreams” from shawn, and “fuck managers” from angie. yakko would have gone with that last one if he was in the position of having to leave the store altogether at the end of the month, which was what angie was going through.

he wouldn’t say anything until it happened, but he was transferring to the target electronics section. annalise made sure to put in a good word for him the moment she heard about starbucks closing so he wouldn’t be completely out of a job. it wasn’t going to be anything like making coffee but he was grateful he wouldn’t have to look for another job. 

but it wasn’t a moment for cheers and celebrating.

“fuck cps!” yakko shouted.

if anyone was sober, they would have fallen to an awkward silence. but it was a very different atmosphere and a wave of “yeah”s and “so true king”s came out of a few people while the rest downed their beverages.

suddenly, yakko was pulled back down on the couch, nearly spilling his own drink. he laughed as he felt his head spin wonderfully, and then he was looking at annalise’s concerned human face.

she wasn’t sober either, but she was still coherent and logical. “you still got cps on your ass?”

“the chances of a surprise visit-“ yakko hiccuped “-are low, but never zero.” he brought his finger to his lips like he told her a big secret.

“why _the fuck_ didn’t you tell me sooner? i wouldn’t have brought you here!”

“annie-bannanie, it’s all taken care of! my sibs - they’re smart, they know what to do!”

~

“does this smell funny to you?” dot asked, holding out the styrofoam tray of sushi to her brother.

wakko responded by picking a piece and popping it in his mouth. “fish always has a funny taste. i think they make ‘em different at the gas station.”

dot shrugged and dug in. “good enough for me.”

~

“drunk toons, man,” annalise groaned as she tried to help her friend to his feet.

yakko felt like spaghetti and a funhouse mirror had a baby. his limbs were loose and stretchy (literally - his hands were touching the floor), and any step he took made his entire body feel wobbly. he tried moving one way, but ended up going the opposite way.

“does he do this all the time?” asked shawn, who was on yakko’s other side also trying to help stand him up.

“apparently only when he’s had a lot to drink,” annalise replied, managing to roll up one of yakko’s loosey-goosey arms. “come on, dude, control your limbs.”

yakko mumbled something incoherent.

it took some time with making sure the toon didn’t lose his limbs combined with wading through the crowd of dancers, but annalise and shawn were able to get out of the apartment and into the cold night. the cold air must have hit yakko in the right place because his limbs returned back to normal size and he wasn’t teetering from side to side anymore. his eyes were still glazed over with intoxication, and anything he said was incomprehensible.

“yeah, i know,” annalise said in response to his mumbling. she put his arm around him and then looked at shawn. “i’ll see you at work?”

~

“you have to dive for it, dot!” wakko told his sister as he dug his arm back into the bag of popcorn. “i’m not gonna aim for your mouth!”

“then what’s the point of - ah!” dot received several pieces of popcorn to the face. 

they were sat on opposite ends of the couch, study notes completely abandoned on the coffee table. the tv was also mildly abandoned. it was still on, but neither sibling wanted to watch another rerun of friends, so they resorted to throwing food at each other. going out and nearly getting caught by cps turned out to be the highlight of the night.

dot retaliated by throwing a handful of takis back at wakko, who immediately dived for the pieces. he went so far as to diving off the couch, causing the rest of his popcorn to spill all over the floor. did that stop him from eating them? heavens no.

while wakko ate off the floor, dot checked her phone. _1:04am._ she couldn’t remember the last time she stayed up so late, or ate this much at this hour. how did wakko manage to consume everything and not feel like garbage after? dot could feel her stomach rumble ominously, but she didn’t feel anything too concerning. nothing a little sleep couldn’t fix.

overall, the first night without yakko was a success. no one died, they didn’t get caught by cps, and well… they _attempted_ to study. it’s saturday night, can you blame them? 

by the time the floor was clear of various snack foods, the lock on the front door began to jiggle. dot began to stretch her arms and yawn, finally she could go to bed without a worry. wakko moved back to the couch, grabbing his bottle of soda and draining it for that last bit of sugar before bed.

“helloooo sibs!” greeted yakko as he burst through the door. he then immediately faceplanted over the threshold. 

behind him came annalise. she stumbled into the doorway, looking down at her messy friend. then she made eye contact with his siblings.

“sup.” she burped.

“my kinda woman,” wakko said under his breath.

dot shot him a look before getting to her feet. “annie-bannanie, what happened to our brother? why’s he acting like a ragdoll?”

“adult juice!” the human replied, clinging to the doorway like she was struggling to stay standing. “too much adult juice! _vale más que no manejan cuando están borrachos!”_ she added, wagging a finger at the younger siblings.

“alright, hun.” dot went over and gently took her arm, leading her to the couch. “come sit down.”

“what’s adult juice?” asked wakko. “is that what vodka is?”

annalise nodded her head. “and tequila and whiskey and beer and a bunch of other shit your brother had tonight.”

speaking of the brother, yakko had turned onto his back. he kept his eyes closed and mumbled to himself.

“he seems fine,” wakko said as he stood over the toon. “he does this when he’s stressed. he just has to stand up.”

he leaned down to grab yakko’s arm. the limb went all stretchy and wobbly like it did before, and yakko did nothing in an attempt to keep that from happening. he acted as if he wasn’t even being touched, even when his arm was dropped to the floor again.

“he needs water,” annalise said.

“you need a nap,” dot told her.

wakko had gone to the kitchen and back, britta pitcher in hand. he approached yakko on the floor again, hesitating for a second. finally, he shrugged and poured the water on his brother’s head. 

yakko made a noise, inhaled some of the water, and coughed loudly. the shock of the cold water got him sitting up again, sputtering and pounding at his own chest as he looked around at his surroundings.

“that’s not what i- okay…” annalise said.

“your turn!”

“no! just a glass will suffice!”

“i’ll get it,” dot said as she took the pitcher from her brother.

yakko was still looking around as he held his head. “party…?”

“party over,” annalise replied.

“sibs…?”

“i’m here!” wakko said cheerfully as he plopped down next to his brother. “dot’s here too!”

yakko nodded and gave him a thumbs up, and then lied back down on the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiii this took longer than i anticipated but here it is!! thanks for all the love on this fic I’m glad there’s ppl who like it!!!🥰


	5. what if i'm alright here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "i jump from the train, i ride off alone  
> i never grew up, it's getting so old" - the archer, taylor swift  
> (I’m eventually gonna put all these in a playlist)(it’s all gonna be t swift at this point ugh)
> 
> cw: mentions of vomiting

when yakko woke up, he was in the bathtub. judging by the heaviness in his eyes and the looseness in his body, he still needed several more hours of sleep before he felt halfway normal again. so why was he awake then? was the cramp in his neck that painful? no. was it both wakko and dot knocking on the door, begging to let them in? kind of. was it the doorbell ringing consistently? yeah, that too.

anyone who personally knows the warners know that they need to knock instead of using the doorbell, that way yakko could get an idea of who was at the door. only strangers, the landlord, and the social worker rang the bell.

he breathed slowly, mindful of his grumbling insides as he tried to get up. for some weird reason, the loud knocking sounds agitated his stomach more, and he had to pause halfway through getting up to will away the feeling of getting sick. he felt like the whole world was lagging with every move he made, and it made his head spin and pound at the same time.

when he finally opened the door, both siblings bolted past him. they fought for the toilet, but wakko came out victorious, and it was only because he threw up first. dot resigned and sat against the cabinet under the sink, clutching her stomach in pain.

_great. everyone’s sick._

“what…?” yakko tried to say, but caught himself before he could also explode.

“gas station - sushi -“ dot choked out before grabbing the trash bin and burying her head in it.

yakko was wishing he was still unconscious at this point, and that he was dreaming up this disaster. the sibs were in one place, so that would do for now. he took slow steps towards the door, feeling the room spin as he went. he was hoping that whoever was ringing the bell had given up and left, but yakko spotted the suited man looking through the window.

he sighed before answering the door.

the man returned to the threshold. “yakko warner?”

“...you have just won one million dollars?” he guessed, placing a hand over his stomach as it rumbled.

“no-“

“brand new car?”

“no-“

“alright well, it was nice seein’ ya!”

he managed to get the door shut for a split second before the man was knocking again. yakko knew it was a long shot, but given how desperate he was to be free of this so he could puke and then slip into a coma, he had to get rid of this guy as soon as possible.

the man was holding up his badge the next time the door opened. “chester o’connell, cps. i’m here for a follow up visit. i arrived here around ten thirty and no one was here. wanna tell me about that?”

usually, it was no sweat. most weekends, yakko shipped the sibs to their friends houses while he did the driving gig. this weekend, however, everything was last minute. he had originally planned to take some time off from driving, just have a calm weekend with his family, but then annalise dragged him to the party that got lost somewhere in his brain.

as soon as annalise crossed his mind, yakko looked around at the living room. no one else was here, but he saw dot’s fluffy white blanket on the couch. a very hazy memory of annalise wandering around the living room came to mind.

“mr. warner,” said the agent, snapping the toon out of his thoughts. “i’m asking you to tell me where you and the kids were last night.”

“and you did, good job!” yakko’s voice projected a bit but that only caused another wave of nausea to hit him. he hicupped, clutching his stomach a little tighter.

mr. something-or-other took note of this. “so you we’re gone late last night, but your car was still here. at least you were responsible with your debauchery.”

damn, that obvious. but before yakko could internally panic, he remembered what dot told him. _gas station, sushi._ that was also when he came to the realization that the sibs left the apartment last night.

before he could even open his mouth, he heard the sounds of his brother emerging from the bathroom.

“yakko, my stomach-“

yakko turned his head, wincing at both the cramp in his neck and the sight of wakko vomiting on the carpet before he could finish his sentence. then, he turned back to the social worker.

“well, chest hair, you caught me,” he said. “we made a great expedition to the gas station down the street. you ever have a california roll from an ampm?”

“no, but-“

“do you want to? because mine’s about to come back-“ he cut himself off before that statement could become reality.

chestnut said something, but yakko put all his focus on not getting sick right then and there… and his head was still fuzzy. how bad would it be if he puked on chesty’s expensive looking loafers? _mm, better not._

then mr. chesty was leaving down the stairs. yakko shut the door, not even trying to remember what he was told.

“yakko…” complained wakko from the bathroom doorway. the sounds of dot getting sick could be heard from there.

yakko said nothing as he swiftly walked over to the trash can in the kitchen. everything he drank last night made its violent exit, leaving yakko feeling surprisingly better after. well, from his stomach at least. he still had a pounding headache and the kink in his neck, not to mention he had to shut the curtains because the sun was out for blood today.

wakko and dot, on the other hand, were experiencing food poisoning. both were nauseous, vomiting, and riddled with chills and cramps. well, wakko had most of the cramps. after puking twice, he just went to lay down in one of the rooms. dot spent the most time in the bathroom, leaving wakko to explain to their eldest brother that they made a trip down the street and that dot’s sushi smelled off.

yakko decided that the food poisoning was enough punishment for both of them.

he made three strong mugs of chamomile and kept a trash bin near each sibling when he got them both in the master bedroom (which was dot’s room only because she got the bigger mattress.) yakko sat between them on the bed and rubbed their backs when either of them got sick again. then they were rubbing his back when he threw up the four tylenols he took without food.

they all slept through the morning, sans the times one of the younger sibs woke up to run to the bathroom. yakko was finally awake and halfway okay again by the time he got a facetime call from annalise.

“oh good, you’re alive,” she said when yakko answered.

“at the cost of the health of everyone living in this apartment,” he replied, keeping his voice down as he crawled out of bed. both sibs were out like lights, and he didn’t want to disturb them. he quietly left the room and went to sit on the couch.

“so you’re feeling that hangover, huh?” annalise replied. “eat a big meal, it’ll help.”

“ugh, i can’t even think about food,” yakko said with a groan. come to think of it, it was time for another grocery shop, and that was supposed to be the plan for today. what was he going to feed the sibs? going out with the sun still up didn’t feel like a good option given his headache. “well, now i’m thinking about food.”

“trust me, you need to gain back all the energy you lost to mixing all your liquor!” annalise told him. “i’d suggest ordering a pizza, but you said everyone’s health is compromised? what happened to your siblings?”

“food poisoning.”

“oof, poor things.”

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ they brought it upon themselves. they snuck out to get some shady gas station sushi and now they’re paying for it.”

annalise chuckled. “that’s not even the worst place they could sneak off to.”

“yeah, but you’ve seen the neighborhood we live in.”

“true.” yakko paused for a minute. he always thought he was doing right by them, setting up general rules and still trying to be flexible. he told them to order food if they were hungry, but instead they chose to leave without so much as sending a text! what if they were followed or mugged or taken? what if cps caught them when they were leaving or coming back?

what does he have to do to get them to listen? sure, the warners were never about listening to orders. if someone told them to go down, they went up. but now things were different. yakko had to be the one giving orders, and reminding the sibs of the smallest things, like _don’t leave the apartment late at night oh my god you should know what’s out there we spent the better part of five years out there._

“yeah,” annalise said as if she had read his mind. then she changed the topic. “so how much do you remember from last night?”

yakko tried to bring himself back to the conversation. “got lost somewhere in the nations of the world.”

“yeah, that’s when you went all noodley. after you sang, you tried to teach james how to find his hammerspace despite the fact that he’s human.”

honestly, annalise could have told him anything and he would have believed it. yakko could visualize it, but the memory was nowhere to be found. “yeah, that sounds like me… or drunk me, i guess.” he rubbed his temples, exhausted.

“yeah,” annalise said. “you also mentioned that cps was still on your ass, and that’s when we left.”

“oh!” he sat up a little. “cps came last night while the sibs were out!”

“no!”

“yes! and the guy came back early this morning! luckily, he didn’t get the chance to interrogate any of us since he saw we were sick.”

“so why are they still on you? i thought your parenting thing was a done deal!”

“it is, but being nineteen, working two jobs, and living in a shady part of town means they’re keeping an eye out.” he paused and then added, “at least, that’s what one of dot’s friend’s parents made sure of.”

“what, they’re just targeting you because of what one person said?”

yakko shrugged. “cps take all claims very seriously. if the guy that showed up had figured out i was hungover instead of food poisoned, i don’t know what would have happened.”

“fuck. maybe it is lucky that wakko and dot snuck out, then you wouldn’t have a believable alibi.”

she was right. and the worst part is, the sibs were probably aware of this too. food poisoning wouldn’t have been nearly as believable if mr. chest hair something-or-other hadn’t seen one of the sibs be sick alongside yakko. maybe that’s why dot quickly spit it out before actually spitting out.

yakko looked at his phone screen, noticing that annalise looked different. her eyes were much smaller without the dark eyeliner and thick false lashes. maybe she was recovering from the night before too. and that brought another thought forward.

“did you sleep here?”

she ran her fingers through hair, tossing it to one side. “yeah, when we got back, i sat down on the couch and watched your brother pour water on you, and then i was asleep. someone put a blanket on me. i left like around seven. probably should have left a note. or a text.” she chuckled nervously.

“no, you’re welcome here anytime,” yakko reassured. “i just thought you would have spent the night with mr. tall, handsome guitar player.”

“well…” annalise trailed off, attempting to hold down a grin. “i kind of wanted to, but i was drunker than he was, and you were drunker than all of us. he wanted both of us to be okay before anything else, so he got my number.”

yakko raised his eyebrows, impressed. “huh. what a guy.”

“yeah, we’ve been texting.”

“texting? oh, annie-bannanie, you’ve got yourself a gentleman suitor!”

the grin on her face only got wider. “no, not like that. but maybe soon.” normally she would try to downplay any emotion as much as possible, but the giddiness was evident on her face.

yakko would have continued teasing her and getting more mushy information out of her, but then noises came from the bedroom. painful noises.

“well, the baby’s up, so i gotta go,” yakko said.

“no worries, hope you all recover soon!”

as soon as the call ended, yakko was on his feet, going back to the room.

dot was still fast asleep, laying on her side. wakko on the other hand, was facing away from his sister, fidgeting and curled up in a ball.

“the bin’s right there, baby sib,” yakko told him as we went over to wakko’s side.

“no, it hurts,” wakko groaned, kicking his feet.

“what? what hurts?”

“stomach.”

“you probably just need to throw up again, here-“ yakko grabbed the bin, but wakko turned away.

“it hurts like last time.”

that feeling struck yakko’s chest again. it sucked the breath out of him and made his mouth turn dry and his heart rate skyrocket. but he couldn’t break down, not yet. he wasn’t even sure how serious it was yet.

“okay, okay,” he said to himself. then he touched his brothers forehead. “no fever, only pain. probably not an infection. you cold, sib?”

wakko shook his head.

“okay, alright.”

then dot began to stir, having woken up due to wakko’s agonized sounds.

“what’s wrong with him?” she asked, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes as she moved to sit up.

“we’re gonna find out, sib sister,” yakko said, his tone managing to stay even despite the fact that he could feel his soul start to slip away. “get your jacket, and wakko’s too. we’re going to the emergency room.”

dot looked between her two brothers, still processing the situation in her sleepy mind. then she went to the closet.

by the time they were all in the car, yakko was muttering the nations of the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if u see me changing chapter names no u don’t❤️ ANYWAYS thanks again for all the love and comments and everything!!!!!!!


	6. i hate my reflection for years and years

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next few chapters will be based on:  
> the archer - taylor swift
> 
> cw: slightly graphic (first paragraph only), blood mentions

wakko has endured many painful things in his life. from an anvil dropping on his skull, to falling on the ground from a dangerous height. a tube going through his nose, down the back of his throat and into his intestines wasn’t exactly the most painful thing he’s experienced, but it was pretty intense. a couple of years ago he dreamed of nothing more than eating until he was full, but now he was wishing that whatever was stuck in his gut would get out so he didn’t have to deal with this tube anymore.

the worst part is, this wasn’t the first time his body had trouble passing through the system. while living on the streets, he ate a cardboard pizza box because… he’s wakko. he’s eaten worse things and besides, there wasn’t a lot to eat, and he could handle it. but some hours later the pain struck in his abdomen, and it wasn’t relieved until he was leaning into a nearby bush to get it out. 

that was the first indication that wakko was losing his toon self. that was also when he realized that it wasn’t food he liked, it was eating. and he couldn’t even do that now because the NG tube in his body was currently getting everything out.

a doctor who specialized in toon health had only asked wakko two questions once he was placed in a room.

“how old are you?”

“sixteen.”

“and how long has it been since your unveiling procedure?”

“five years.”

the doctor then turned to yakko for information on what happened. symptoms, the length of time wakko had been in pain for, the works. then wakko was sent to get his body scanned. within an hour, he learned that he had a “bowel obstruction” and therefore needed the tube. he also had “diverticulosis” which was rare for someone his age. but apparently that’s what happens when someone has the eating habits of wakko warner.

it only took that first hour for wakko to decide that he never wanted to be in the hospital ever again. the stuff he was injected with during his scan made him want to throw up again and the tube…

he didn’t scream in pain, but he grabbed the nurse’s arm while she was trying to put it in. not to stop her, nor to try to pull it out, but simply just to keep himself grounded because it was such a bizarre feeling even with the morphine. other interns had to come in and hold him down and attempt to soothe him.

yakko and dot weren’t allowed to be in the room with him while that happened. not that that would have made it any easier. 

“so good news!” doctor toon-health-specialist said after that nightmare of a procedure was over. he smiled wide at wakko. “your body is adapting well to the human world. the bad news is you had to find out via bowel obstruction.”

“something’s wrong with me, and you see it as a good thing?” wakko replied. he really wasn’t in the mood for humor.

yakko noticed. didn’t this kid realize how lucky he was?

“well,” the doctor went on, “if you had waited a day or two to come in, your intestines might have ruptured and killed you. you’re very lucky you got your older brother here who knew to bring you in. you may even have to avoid surgery.”

“at least then i would have been unconscious and wouldn’t have to feel anything going inside me,” wakko mumbled.

yakko shot him a look. then he took over. “we know things could be a lot worse. thanks for everything, doc.”

“i’ll be back later to check on you. yakko, could i have a word?” the doctor said.

now puzzled, yakko got up and followed the human out to the hallway.

“look, i’m sorry for my brother's attitude,” he began, “it’s been a long day. all three of us had food poisoning and ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ we didn’t expect to end up here.”

“i understand,” said doctor ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ (yakko flickered his eyes to the tag on his lab coat) rogers, “i do have a small concern. i noticed on wakko’s record that there’s no psychologist referral.”

“why would he need one of those?” yakko asked, now genuinely confused.

“well, not just him, but all three of you. didn’t you get a referral when you had your unveiling?”

“i don’t think so. we were just given the appointment from our studio and that was it.” and then the studio kicked them to the curb without a second glance. “why do we need psychology?”

“the unveiling process as well as the transition from toon life to human life can be quite taxing. you should have been assigned a therapist or a psychiatrist.”

yakko already knew perfectly well how taxing the unveiling was. he knew it was awful and he knew that the way things went after that weren’t good. he didn’t need another schmuck in glasses to tell him what was mentally wrong with him. all they do is look at you like a project or something to be fixed.

“well, we didn’t,” he told doctor rogers. “and i think we’re better off.”

the doctor seemed skeptical, but he let it go. “alright, but if you change your mind, we have resources here. i’ll return later to check on wakko.”

yakko stood in the hall for a minute after doctor rogers left. he took a breath, noticing how tense his jaw and shoulders were. now that he wasn’t constantly have to speak to someone or wait for someone to tell him his sibling wasn’t dying, the panic was coming down on him like an aftershock. it sat on his chest, but he took a deep breath like annalise taught him, and he let it go for now. he had to talk to his little brother.

wakko’s eyes were fixed on the IV bag he was hooked up to. he could hear yakko talking - no, lecturing - but he wasn’t listening. his head was many layers deep into flashbacks of the unveiling. 

he couldn’t deny the blow to the chest he felt when he first learned that a side effect of being apart of the human world was that his appetite and eating habits would change. in fact, it put him off from wanting to change altogether. but what choice did he have? yakko and dot were still up for it, and wakko didn’t want to get left behind. 

the three of them were hooked up to bags like the IV. except instead of clear nutrients, it was human blood. it took six hours for them to change forms… to change worlds.

most toons lived in their respective studios. the studios themselves also doubled as mini toon towns. a building that looked like it was designed for important business meetings most likely doubled as housing for the toon stars. some toons chose to live on their respective sets since they had the power to make just about anything functional. that’s why the water tower worked out for the warners.

the warners were still allowed to live in the water tower after animaniacs had ended. it wasn’t likely that the tower would be used in any other productions, unlike the regular sets that would get destroyed to build new ones. 

they still made money off the show for a while after it ended. anything that needed to be paid for (rent, food, utilities, etc) came out of their checks, and that was why they saw so little of them. funny thing is, they were under the impression that the studio was still paying for their staying there. that’s what plotz told them anyway, and that their checks were much smaller because the show was being aired less and less as time went on. for some reason, it never crossed the warners’ minds that the studio was stealing from them.

and then came the new ceo. he was kind, charming, and bantered with the siblings. it didn’t take long for him to get on their good side. so it wasn’t hard to convince them to move off the lot while renovations ensued. there wasn’t any additional housing on the lot, so they were told to go to a special place in the human world. what was this special place? oh, a surprise for after your unveiling. (spoiler: there wasn’t a special place.)

even doctor scratchansniff was telling them to go.

yakko was skeptical at first, but scratchy’s words meant something to him. dot was up for it at the get go. being confined to the lot was making her restless. wakko would have been more indecisive if his sibs didn’t already agree to moving first. it was nice not having any obligations regarding making a tv show, but he didn’t exactly want to leave either. it was all he knew, and he didn’t see the point in making changes in a perfectly functional tower.

they’d be returning in a few months, but it was too long to stay in the human world as regular toons. so the studio set them up to go to a clinic for the unveiling.

at first, wakko thought the term “unveiling” was a little dramatic. all he did was sit in a big chair and watch the human blood enter his veins through a tiny little tube in his arm. but the more time went on, the dizzier he got, the more he felt sick somewhere in his body. his vision blurred, he threw up several times. it wasn’t a pleasant process. by the time it was over, everything around him looked much more clear. he felt lighter, he felt calm. like there was something covering his eyes for as long as he lived, and now it was gone. 

the point of this process was to bring a balance between toon function and human function. a toon couldn’t live in the human world on its own. one rainy day would send their ink running down into the gutter. one heat wave would cause them to dry up and become part of the surface they were standing on. one wrong step on the grating would send them into the sewer, where they would then become a puddle of ink. so the unveiling is necessary.

but it wasn’t all good. there were side effects, apart from the ones that the drip gave him. for starters, all three warners had some pretty intense migraines in the days following the unveiling. wakko couldn’t be out in the sun it was so bad. 

but that was nothing. another side effect was that hammerspace gets compromised. the best scenario would be that it would shrink, and the worst would be that it would disappear altogether. the warners were lucky that all three of their spaces only shrank. none of them could hold just anything anymore. wakko’s hammerspace felt like an invisible backpack now.

then, of course, was the inability to get injured. that was completely gone now. all it took was dot spraining her ankle after jumping a fence for all three warners to realize how fragile they had gotten.

it’s been five years, and they get less toony every day. wakko sitting in a hospital bed receiving the same care a human would was only more proof of it.

“do you understand me?” yakko said.

_oop- exposition over. back to the scene at hand._

“huh?” wakko replied, finally tearing his eyes away from the IV drip. 

“i said, you better know how lucky you are.” yakko was standing at the foot of the bed, hands on his hips. he had never looked like such an angry adult before. he’s definitely changed. “and you better realize how dangerous it is for you to be eating things like _cellophane.”_

“cellophane tastes bad anyway.”

“and now you know not to eat it anymore,” yakko said back. as he went to sit down next to dot he added, “though you should have known that already.”

wakko didn’t speak much to his siblings after that. yakko was obviously upset with him, and dot probably was too. she just wanted to sleep off the food poisoning from the comfort of her own bed. she had been unusually quiet, but that may have just been the sickness.

both siblings sat at the chairs against the wall, and they were asleep in minutes. wakko wanted to sleep too, but the reminders of all the change he’s gone through kept him awake.

he tried to swallow the lump in his throat, but it was just the NG tube. he couldn’t even swallow, so once again wakko had no choice but to deal with the things he couldn’t control. when was it going to stop?

he turned his head away from his sleeping siblings so they wouldn’t see his tear stained, tubed up face.

~

they fixed him, but he still looked so broken.

the next morning, the tube was taken out of wakko’s nose. yakko and dot weren’t allowed to be in the room for that. dot was pretty okay with not having to see any of that, but she knew wakko was having a bad time overall, and she wanted to be there. that was why she had such a fit when yakko told her she couldn’t spend the night in the hospital.

she was too young to stay. like she wasn’t drawn more than two decades ago. but _no, this is the human world and aging doesn’t work the same._

she couldn’t deny that. her emotions were off the shits, and so were wakko’s. that was something dot had wished she knew about before the unveiling. sure, the doctors and nurses went over the big stuff, like growing up from the age you were drawn (dot was drawn as a 9 year old, and began aging from there.) but little things like hormone imbalances? having to go to the bathroom every couple of hours? acne? _getting sick?_ forget about it.

dot had to spend the night with annalise at the apartment. it wasn’t bad at all. dot didn’t feel as sick to her stomach anymore, although she was weary at annalise’s offer of making food. turns out, she makes a pretty good chicken noodle. aside from that, she introduced dot to another girl group to listen to: little mix.

“you listen to pop? aren’t you a goth?”

“okay, yes but listen: women.”

“fair.”

so dot had the album get weird on repeat throughout the morning.

but the dancey, funky tunes couldn’t take away the eerie feeling of returning to the hospital. the sadness was radiating off her brother as she watched him lie in his bed, you’d think he was dying. but wakko actually got more good news, apart from the tube removal: he was not going to need surgery. whatever was lodged in his guts was out. yakko and dot sighed in relief, but wakko only nodded and quietly thanked the doctor. 

after that, dot sent yakko to go home and shower. it was still going to be another day, and he smelt like rancid booze. so he went, but only after calling annalise to come take his place. once he knew she was on her way, yakko left his siblings.

“why are you so sad?” dot didn’t really feel like beating around the bush. 

“‘m not sad,” wakko replied. “just hungry.”

“i know you were crying yesterday,” she told him. she hadn’t planning on revealing that, but seeing this side of her brother was just… a little jarring. “is it because they told you you could have died?”

wakko sighed, looking up at the ceiling. “no.”

“did the tube hurt too much?”

“no, dot.”

“then what? i don’t wanna repeat everything yakko said-“

“so don’t then.” he didn’t yell or raise his voice, but his tone was cold.

that didn’t stop dot for a single second. she almost wanted to snap at him the way yakko did, but she could already see that that didn’t do any good. instead, she took a deep breath to center herself, and then she reached for her brother’s hand. “you don’t have to say why you’re sad. but i know you’re gonna be okay.”

wakko stayed where he was for a minute, eyes fixed on the lights. then, “how do you know?”

“‘cause the doctor said so, silly!” dot offered a playful grin before getting serious again. “you’re a warner brother. nothing can stop you.”

“thanks dot.”

“and my birthday’s coming up soon, so if you die in the next twenty four hours i’ll have to kick you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all the kings horses  
> all the kings men  
> couldn’t put me together again  
> ‘cause all of my enemies  
> started out friends


	7. invisible smoke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tell me what to do to make it all feel better - melanie martinez, pity party
> 
> i pace like a ghost, the room is on fire - taylor swift, the archer

“sorry, sis,” yakko said, sympathy in his voice. “not this time.”

receiving bad news early in the morning wasn’t ideal, but dot brought it upon herself. she had been pestering yakko to call the agency she had her last audition at since they spent the weekend busy with wakko and couldn’t do it sooner. to be fair, the casting director said he would call within a week, and failed to do so. dot wanted to know if she got the role so she could either prepare or move on with her life. once again, it was the latter.

“they don’t know what they’re missing,” she simply declared as she stood from the dining table.

she brought her cereal bowl to the sink. it was time to move forward. that was the best thing she could do.

dot had to admit, breakfast without wakko was a little boring. he had to miss school for a few days after being discharged, so he was still sleeping. not having anyone to fight with was nice at first, but now dot actually had time to kill, which was why she made yakko call the casting director.

thinking about it, dot wondered if wakko would be in the mood to hog all the food and fight over the sink in the bathroom. his jarring sadness seemed to only worsen ever since the doctor put him on a soft food diet. at least, dot noticed that. yakko just told her that wakko only slept so much because sleep was the best medicine.

to combat the odd change in routine and the latest audition rejection, dot played upbeat little mix songs in the car on the way to school. ever since she was introduced to the group, she hasn’t been able to listen to anything else. it reawakened the hype she would feel to start the day and get things done. the vibes had to be just right for the energy she wanted to capture, and little mix had that energy in a majority of their discography.

“what happened to madam swift?” yakko asked.

“she got too sad, so i bumped her,” dot replied.

“but you were only listening to her sad songs.”

“no, i listened to all her songs, and the negative ones stuck with you.”

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ okay, what's this little mix all about? a little mix of what?”

“talent, beauty, magic. much like yours truly. it’s a match made in heaven!”

giddy as she was to ramble about her new favorite thing, dot felt a bundle of nerves in her stomach. it had nothing to do with her interests, it was just going to school. all she did was count the hours before it was over. at least today she had a plan other than just getting through her classes.

she looked down at the stack of baby pink envelopes on her lap. this was going to be an exciting week, she just knew it. 

“how many people did you decide to invite after all?” yakko asked her.

“fifteen.”

“we agreed on ten! i don’t think the folding table holds that many people!”

“so get another table. it’s fifteen people for my fifteenth birthday!”

yakko sighed, trying to think about how to make a compromise. he had to go shop for dot’s gift with the leftover money from the party, and his sister wasn’t about generic brand perfumes and other beauty things. there wasn’t enough to get another table that would seldom be used.

“okay, but hear this,” he said, “is it fifteen people total, counting you, me, and wakko?”

“no, that would be eighteen.”

“then it’s not fifteen for your fifteenth, is it?”

dot opened her mouth to rebuttal, and then she was flipping through the invites. she picked out three of them, rolled down the window, and then they were flying down the highway. “it is now.”

what those people don’t know won’t hurt them. besides, it’s not like they were close friends. dot didn’t really have many of those at school. chessie came pretty close, until her mom stuck her nose in a place where it shouldn’t be.

so now dot went back to hopping between groups during lunch. she got along with everybody, and this was because of her indecisiveness when she first started attending. did she want to pursue softball? golf? cheerleading? a theatre kid? she eventually joined dance in the place of PE, and wanted to join the official team, but auditions weren’t until the end of the school year.

still, dot didn’t stick with her dance classmates all the time. she reached out to people in other classes, even getting along with wakko’s friends from band class. she was well liked. people were delighted to receive an invitation to her party, and she was delighted that they liked her enough to want to celebrate.

~

yakko needed to calm down, permanently. he couldn’t figure out how or why these things kept happening because they were a real downer and always left him feeling like he ran a marathon. these ‘panic attacks’ were happening more and more frequently, and it was harder to hide them in this tiny little apartment. he thanked the stars that wakko slept in so he wouldn’t hear his brother wheezing in the bathroom.

he got up from the floor and turned on the sink. he splashed cold water in his face and kept his eyes on the running water. he didn’t want to look up at the mirror, worried he might not recognize the toon staring back at him. he couldn’t feel anymore disconnected from, well, everything.

normally, yakko was good at keeping calm, even when he felt himself falling apart. if there was anything he was really good at, it was forcing himself to focus on the task at hand, like when he had to make a big order at (what used to be) starbucks. or when he had to take wakko to the hospital. or when dot told him how many people she invited to her party. sure, the tightness in his chest and throat were present during those times, but it would subside the busier he was and the more he talked. talking was soothing, it didn’t matter what the subject was.

but when he got home from dropping his sister off, there was no one to talk to. wakko was asleep. dot was at school. annalise was at work. it all came rushing back like a tidal wave, and yakko had to lock himself in the bathroom. he was shaking, scrambling to get his thoughts back together. he was fine not that long ago, what gives?

he nearly jumped out of his skin when there was a knock on the door. he quickly turned off the sink and turned to open the door.

wakko was yawning and rubbing his eye, but he took note of his older brother’s appearance.

_ oh no, he probably heard me coughing and wheezing. he can see right through me. _

“why’s your face all wet?”

“why’s yours dry?” yakko replied as he walked past. he didn’t wait for a reply as he went into the kitchen to make breakfast.

five minutes of loud blender sounds later, yakko had a protein berry smoothie ready. he poured it into a glass and added a blue metal straw, presenting it to wakko when he came out of the bathroom.

he wasn’t that impressed. the eager face he normally had on his face at mealtimes faltered immediately as he looked around at the counter. “where’s breakfast?”

“right here,” yakko replied, tapping the glass. “has all the nutrients you need and it’s gentle on your stomach.”

wakko’s ears drooped a little as he took a sip. he didn’t try to argue, but he was clearly upset with having so little to eat. yakko was honestly a little relieved; with all the last minute party planning and whatever was going on deep in his own head, he didn’t have the energy to fight.

“why didn’t you go to work?” wakko asked after a few minutes of silent sipping.

“took some days off to stay with you while you recover.”

“i know how to stay by myself, i’m not eleven anymore.”

_ you probably would have eaten with reckless abandon and ended up back in the hospital if you were left to your own devices. _

well, that and yakko’s training for his new position at work wasn’t until the weekend. but why would he tell either of his siblings that? they didn’t need to hear that yakko didn’t have a job to go to for a few days. it would only cause unnecessary worry.

“recovery is better when you’re not alone,” yakko told him.

wakko made a face. “what, did you get that off the disney channel?”

still crabby. it was only the first day back to semi normalcy.

“alright, finish your breakfast and then go get ready. we’re gonna go find dot’s birthday present. ah-ah-ah!” he reached out to wakko, who was about to shove the whole glass cup in his mouth. “remember what the doctor said! you can’t-”

“i can’t eat whatever i want, i know,” wakko cut across him. then he chugged the smoothie in one go and set the glass down rather loudly. “everyone’s said it enough times.”

now yakko was starting to get annoyed. didn’t this kid realize there were other things going on now? being on a diet wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

“well, you’re the one who decided to eat a bag of chips, including the bag, so you’ve only got yourself to blame,” he said, keeping his tone even. “now go get ready, we’re leaving soon.”

wakko rolled his eyes and dragged his feet to the room.

once again, yakko needed to remind himself that it was only the first day of returning to normal.

~

dot rushed out of the bathroom, nearly running into wakko, who was coming out of his room. she also nearly hit her hip against the long folding table set up in the living room. it was already five o’clock and she wasn’t dressed yet. guests would be arriving any minute, and she was elated.

a big, goofy grin showed up on her face as she closed her bedroom door behind her. she looked down at the dress laid out on her bed. it was a little formal, something for a big wrap party but not fancy enough for a red carpet event. earlier today at school, she reminded her friends that there would be a formal dress code, because eating pizza in beautiful dresses seemed ideal.

her dress was long, baby pink, and had ruffles around the skirt. she had it for a while, and now she finally had an excuse to wear it. she rarely got to dress up anymore, not even for her brothers’ birthdays.

still, she got them to dust off their nice button ups for the occasion, although wakko insisted on keeping his hat on. sure, this party wasn’t being held at the pretty ballroom at the marriott downtown like she originally wanted, but everyone was still required to dress to the nines. 

dot came out of her room still grinning, even though the living room was still guest-less. she looked around at the pretty pink and gold decorations, pacing the area to get a good look. shiny gold confetti was sprinkled across the table, the flower centerpiece was made with fresh white roses.

yakko was in the kitchen, counting the liters of soda as he put them on the counter. then the pizzas stacked on the counter, and finally the goodie bags on the counter to triple check that there was enough. wakko was sat on the couch, scrolling through his phone. funny, dot expected him to be eyeing the food and getting first dibs.

the clock on the wall said it was fifteen after five. dot climbed onto the couch and looked out the window, hoping to see anyone in a fancy getup heading towards the staircase. but the lot was empty, and the sun was starting to set.

dot sighed and sat on the cushion, now checking her phone. not a single text from anyone saying they’re running late.

“does your phone work?” she asked wakko.

he was puzzled by the question. “yes?”

“it’s just that i told them five o’clock, not five sixteen! and no one told me they would be late!”

“they’ll be here. nothing in this town starts on time.”

with a huff, dot sat down on the cushion. she could feel her insides starting to steam and brew, but she took a deep breath to combat it. wakko was right, nothing ever starts when it’s supposed to. although, if either of them were twenty minutes late to school, it would result in a detention, so could that logic really be applied?

dot just sat there on the couch with her hands in her lap, waiting. waiting for a knock on the door, or the buzz of her phone.

yakko cracked a few jokes to fill the increasingly tense silence. dot didn’t laugh, and that was the first indication that something was very wrong. after a few more minutes, she wordlessly got up and sat at the head of the table.

the look in her eyes was blank, but polite. the everpresent grin was the thing that made it more unsettling. wakko offered playing iphone games with her to help pass the time, but she remained still and silent.

five o’clock turned to six o’clock, and six o’clock turned to six thirty. it was dark outside, and neither warner brother looked the warner sister’s way.

yakko pulled out his phone as he leaned against the counter. he pulled up his most recent texts. not every parent contacted him about party details and drop off/pick up times (as if all of that wasn’t on the invitation) but he still had the numbers of the ones that did. actually, only three moms sent texts, and no one else tried to contact him. three out of twelve. that should have been the first indication that this party wasn’t going to happen, and yakko started to feel a pit in his stomach.

but what could he have done? dot told him that everyone confirmed they would be coming. it’s not like anyone could force these kids to attend a party. but maybe he could have pushed for more parents to confirm with him that their kids would come and celebrate his baby sister’s birthday.

he called one of the numbers and swiftly walked across the living room and into his and wakko’s room. said little brother was quick to follow.

“what are you doing?” yakko asked, phone pressed to his ear.

“the tension in that room is so thick you could put candles on it, sing happy birthday, blow them out, and cut a slice of it!” he replied.

yakko was half distracted by the sound of the dial tone. but he figured since wakko was here…

“try finding dot’s friends on twitter or facebook or wherever. see where they’re at.”

wakko nodded and pulled out his phone, typing away.

yakko began pacing the bedroom, glancing every so often at dot in the living room. she stayed where she was. he stopped his pacing when he heard the voicemail message on the other line. grumbling under his breath, he dialed the next parent. again, no answer. there’s no way these people would just let their kids ditch their friend on her birthday. there’s no way betrayal is such a prominent thing in this world.

he called the last parent and leaned against the ladder of the bunk bed. he could see dot from where he was standing. her back was to the bedrooms, so she couldn’t see her brothers scrambling to locate her party guests.

_ there’s no way in hell my baby sister is getting stood up on her birthday. _

no answer. yakko wanted to scream.

“c’mon wakko, tell me you got something,” he said, instead of losing his mind.

wakko was typing and scrolling at light speed. then he looked at his brother. “three of her friends blocked me on the spot. three other friends left me on read. i can’t even find the rest of them.”

“i don’t get it! dot said every person she gave an invitation to was coming! what the hell happened?”

they both turned at the sound of a thud. yakko and wakko approached the doorway and saw that dot had stood up. she stood up so quickly she knocked her chair back.

“dot?”

she moved as soon as her name was spoken. but she didn’t go to her brothers. instead, dot reached behind her and pulled out her mallet. in one quick swing, she had slammed the folding table, the loud crashing sound ripping through the room. the table bent inwards, and the flower centerpiece was crushed. shards of glass and gold confetti flew everywhere. 

_ “dot-”  _

but she wouldn’t listen. she left the mallet where it was and went for the balloons next. she tore them off the walls, punching and biting them until each one popped.

“should we…?” wakko trailed off, his voice timid.

yakko shook his head. “wait til it’s out of her system…”

so they did. with heavy hearts, they watched dot knock over the folding chairs and shove the liters of soda off the counter. each bottle exploded in different directions, spraying all over dot’s dress. one bottle even shot halfway across the living room from the impact. the pizzas met the kitchen tile, and dot stomped on them, grunting with every blow. that was when yakko decided to step in.

“okay, let’s go.”

he and wakko entered the battlefield, careful not to step on the pieces of glass scattered on the floor. dot was in the middle of placing her cake on the floor, oddly calm despite the furious look on her face. but then she dropped to the ground and brought her fists through the carefully decorated dessert many times. little specks of pink frosting went everywhere, including yakko and wakko as they sat on either side of their sister.

“dot,” yakko said again, much more gently this time as he placed his hands on her shoulders. “princess angelina…”

her punches grew weaker at the sound of her name, but she was still determined to destroy any remnants of what was supposed to be her birthday party. that was when yakko realized that dot only destroyed the party decorations and food.

wakko gently placed his hands over dot’s. her eyes were fixed on the crumbled cake, wide and teary. she sniffed as she tried to hit what was left of it again, but wakko held on a little tighter to let her know that it was over. it’s done.

she seemed to know this because she dropped her head down in defeat. then yakko put his arms around her, cradling her into his chest as she began to sob.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a note from the author: hi guys! once again thank you so much for reading and leaving your comments🥰 it really helps motivate me to keep writing and for that, I’m grateful🖤 now, I do have a tiny lil announcement though: unfortunately I lost my job due to covid recently and I’m kind of at a loss right now. I applied for unemployment but I did not qualify to receive benefits. so I started my Ko-Fi page! It’s linked on my tumblr, hilariouslyedgy! if you like my writing and my story please consider buying me a coffee? if not, that’s totally fine. please keep enjoying my little story. if you do, it’s greatly appreciated and thank you.


	8. who could leave me, but who could stay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they see right through me  
> can you see right through me  
> I see right through me  
> -the archer, taylor swift

“that is the most fucked up thing i’ve ever heard,” annalise said the very next day.

yakko recounted the previous day’s events for the better part of their thirty minute break. he didn’t even try to make a “bugs will nest” joke when annalise’s jaw dropped. the whole thing was just as heartbreaking the second time.

“poor thing cried for hours. and she is not a crier, by any means.” dot never even cried when they were living on the streets.

annalise leaned back in her chair, shaking her head in disbelief. “where is she now?”

“oh, she’s at home,” yakko said. “i made sure wakko would stay with her for the day since i couldn’t be there. i would have called off, but i used up all my paid time off last week.”

he had to take a breath as it dawned on him again. first, his little brother had to go to the hospital, and then his little sister got stood up by her friends. what the hell would the next week bring? or the next month? he still had a another cps visit coming at any moment, it felt like everything was happening at once.

“at least she has the weekend to recuperate,” annalise said after a moment. “hey, she likes makeup, right?”

“yeah, why?”

“there’s gonna be an ulta where the starbucks used to be, and a friend of mine is actually gonna be working there. i’m sure i can get a pretty decent discount on… what brands does dot like?”

“all of them! would you really do that?”

“hey, if no one showed up to her party, then that probably means she didn’t get any gifts. it’ll be from me, she needs a pick-me-up after all that.”

yakko grinned. “thanks, annie.”

it was something that would hopefully cheer dot up before monday. last night before bed, she weakly said she never wanted to go back there. it didn’t seem like that bad of an idea in the moment, but it’s not like yakko could just permanently pull her out of school. the hassle of getting her and wakko into one last year was already stressful enough. besides, no matter how much she was knocked down, dot always got back up. she’s a warner.

same with wakko. he didn’t seem too thrilled about having to stay with dot for the day. he was supposed to go hang out with his friends today, but yakko did not want his little sister staying by herself at the apartment. he wanted it to be a family weekend.

but then wakko made a comment about yakko always leaving despite it being a “family weekend.” that kid was definitely getting a mouth on him.

_one problem at a time._

yakko focused on work. he listened to his new supervisor, shawn. not that yakko was incredibly nervous about entering this new position, but he was glad to see a semi-familiar-and-incredibly-handsome face. at least he had that. plus, he was going to be pushing products to customers, so at least he’d get some type of social fix while on the clock. at least he wasn’t confined behind the starbucks counter anymore… even if he did love his time there.

that was it, looking at the positive side of things. it helped him get through the day. sure, he felt completely numb and away from himself, and he didn’t feel somewhat normal again until he was back in the car after clocking out. it felt like a veil was being ripped from his vision once he was alone in the silence.

either yakko was so used to the speed at which his brain speaks, or he didn’t think a single thought today. all he could really remember was trying to forget how bummed he was that he had to trade the green apron for a red polo, and trying to think of a pun about swapping drinks for electronics. other than that, he was spaced out pretty much the whole day.

he took a deep breath when he was parked outside the apartment. he was finally home, and he could finally be with his family. 

still, he felt a little ghostly as he went up to the front door, even more so when he stepped over the threshold. despite that it was now clean, yakko could still visualize the mess of cake, soda, and broken glass from the day before. he stood in the doorway for a moment, remembering dot’s heartbreaking wails even though he didn’t quite want to.

“yakko!” called both the sister and the brother.

“what?” he replied as he shut the door behind him.

the sibs were on the couch. dot was lying down, fluffy white blanket draped over her as she watched tv. wakko was sitting up with a textbook in his lap, though his phone was being used as a bookmark.

“you guys eat already?” yakko asked as he sat between the two.

“no,” they answered.

“really? not even you, wakko?”

“haven’t been hungry.”

that was definitely out of the ordinary, but so was seeing dot have a massive meltdown. the entire world was flipped over.

this also meant that yakko had to get up and cook something. but even though he hadn’t thunk a single thought all day, he was wiped. it would be so much easier to just order in, but the budget was gone for the month. all of it was spent on the party that never happened.

“dot, how you feeling?” yakko asked, turning to the little one.

“angry,” she replied. “cristina is adamant and firm with what she wants, which is never having children. but owen keeps trying to convince her to be his personal incubator!”

“we’ve been watching grey’s anatomy all day,” wakko said, sounding a bit defeated.

“and you tried to study?” yakko gestured to the history book on his lap.

wakko shrugged, which was as good as a no.

with a shake of his head, yakko sighed. “alright, you two. ever made mac and cheese from the box?”

“no.” again, in unison. they really spent too much time together.

“well, you’re gonna learn. c’mon.”

“promise you won’t sing about it?” dot asked.

“you know i don’t make promises i can’t keep.”

~

dot didn’t sleep at all sunday night. her eyes were fixed on the glow in the dark star stickers on the ceiling, hoping they would teleport her to the depths of space for a few lightyears. the idea of having to go back to school after all this shit was practically unbearable. it made her restless, and she turned to her side to look at the clock on the side table.

_10:44PM_

on regular days, she was out by 9. tonight, dot was restless. she felt sick to her stomach and it was different from the feeling of food poisoning. this felt worse because she couldn’t just vomit out the gross feelings. she couldn’t just eat soup and drink water to undo what had been done. 

she sat up and swung her legs over the edge of her bed. it was times like these she was glad to have her own room, but at the same time, having someone to talk to on hand would have been nice. sometimes she would hear her brothers through the wall just talking to each other from their bunkbed. she could never make out what they were saying, but the company must have been nice.

next thing she knew, dot was making strides to her door. she paused as soon as her hand was on the knob. what would she say to them? they already know how upset she was about the disaster party. both brothers had to get up early for school and work. no need waking them up just to sound like a broken record.

taking a breath, dot turned away and walked back towards her bed. she didn’t sit down, though. she touched the sheets, and then paced the room as she tangled her fingers together.

dot really thought she had experienced enough cruelty for a lifetime. well, getting ditched on her birthday probably wasn’t as bad as getting fired and forced to live on the streets, but it still hurt like a bitch. she was lied to on a massive scale and was made a fool of… again.

except this wasn’t a sleazy ceo that she hardly knew. these were her friends. or so she thought. and it was a few people from every friend group she was apart of, which meant there would be no place for her to sit at lunch unless she wanted to endure more humiliation. not to mention she shared some classes with most of these so called friends. dot wasn’t going to have any safe place.

she wasn’t safe anywhere.

_1:51AM_

_are you really going to let these idiots tear you down? are you really going to just lay down and take it? you’re dot fucking warner! you’re not about to let these awful, awful people win, are you?_

the voice in her head was familiar, and that was why it pained her to quietly respond, “uh-huh…”

listen, she hates it as much as you do. she knows it’s silly to cry over shit like this when worse things have happened. but it didn’t seem to have an ending. dot tried to get herself to sit down and stop crying, but it felt like the room was on fire. it was in her lungs. it was silently eating her alive.

maybe everyone she talked to at school was just pretending to be her friend and it was all one big joke. maybe she wasn’t as cute and likeable as she believed. growing up in hollywood meant that dot knew not everyone was going to like her, and that was why she had to like herself. however, no one told her they would pretend to like her and then turn her into a godforsaken mess _on her birthday_ for… for what?

why did dot have to be the target? why did nothing work for her anymore? she couldn’t get into the school’s production of grease, she couldn’t get into the dance team, her poetry habit wasn’t “caught up to her reading level,” and the one good friend she did have ended up betraying her. oh, and she couldn’t land a decent role in any of the auditions she tried out. the entire freaking universe was against her. 

_6:00AM_

when her alarm went off, dot started crying. she had long since gotten back into bed but sleep never came. her hands went over her eyes, pressing down and reliving some of the brain fog. there was no way she was going to be sent off to school today. not today, nor tomorrow. 

that’s not to say she didn’t try to find it in herself to get off her ass and take the day the way she normally did. try to fake it. put on a pretty face and stay unbothered. but it felt like an anvil was sitting on her chest and shoulders, keeping her down. she couldn’t find it in herself to fight back, and that made her cry more. that might have been more crushing than being abandoned altogether.

so she stayed in bed. even when she heard her brothers talking to each other in the next room. even when she heard them leave the room and get ready for the day. even when wakko came knocking, telling her to hurry up because she always got first dibs on breakfast.

“no!” she called back.

“fine!” wakko mimicked her tone.

then yakko stepped in. “not fine! dot, come on, we have to leave soon! what are you doing in there?”

_trying to avoid school as much as possible, what’s it look like? i just want to sleep and hope to make sense of this shitty fifteenth birthday._

the tears were coming back as she heard the door open. she blinked hard to make them stream down her face. she started sniffling as yakko approached the bed. 

he reached for the lamp and switched it on, getting a clear look at his sister’s face. he seemed to catch up fast.

“not up for it, huh?”

dot shook her head. the crying wasn’t exactly fake, but it always seemed to get yakko to back down.

and it worked. he squeezed her shoulder and sighed. “okay, i’m gonna drop off wakko, and then i’ll come and get you.”

“wait, what?” dot picked her head up.

“you’re coming to work with me today, sis. trust me, you’re gonna want to.”

she doubted it. but at least she got out of school.

yakko left the room, closing the door behind him. before going into the bathroom, he paused. he saw wakko in the kitchen, munching on a piece of toast.

“that’s all you’re eating?”

“i can get free breakfast at school. dot’s got to eat too.”

“huh. awfully nice of you.”

that’s what yakko tried to focus on instead of just how out of it this week was already shaping up to be. yesterday, wakko only had one serving of dinner. dot refused to go to any of her scheduled auditions, not to mention she was still binging that stupid hospital show. how did it all get like this?

well, at least he was in charge of the music on the way to school. but he still found himself listening to the pretty blonde with heart shattering lyrics. wakko made no comment at this, keeping his gaze out the window as the car sped down the highway.

“what kinda free breakfast is there at school?” yakko asked after a moment.

“cereal,” wakko replied, staying in his position.

“that’s it? you could have eat cereal at home.”

“they have bagels too.”

“so do we.”

wakko sighed. “why do i have to eat at home? maybe i wanna have breakfast with my friends.” at least none of his friends give him watchful glances while he ate. then again, he didn’t exactly tell them he was in the hospital. he just wanted one place where he felt normal, and that was now school.

to think, a year ago wakko was dreading having to go to public school. it was another change he had no say in. he didn’t have a say in the tutoring lessons at the studio either, but at least those were private, and he got to be with his siblings. the first week of public school, wakko and dot kept to themselves. they met up between classes and sat together at lunch, not really separating unless it was required.

of course, dot quickly got around and befriended just about anyone who would listen to her. she went her own way as soon as she found chessie. wakko, on the other hand, took a bit longer to find friends. sure, he got into orchestra almost as soon as he stepped foot into the school, but he mostly talked to his violin until he found charlie in the flute section.

she and astro (from algebra 2) were great. both human, both kind. they introduced wakko to d&d, and that was fantastic. he could always go to either of their houses, their parents got along with yakko. they were both incredibly understanding when wakko told them he had to stay with his sister over the weekend.

then wakko felt a pit of guilt in his stomach when he realized that they would probably want to hear about his hospital adventure. they had never given him a hard time before, and they certainly weren’t the types to hover. astro would probably ask if he had any visible scars. charlie might punch him for not telling them sooner.

but both the bowel obstruction and acknowledging that he was never going to eat the way he used to ever again didn’t feel like a topic to bring up during lunch. he was still wrapping his own head around it. that’s why it was so frustrating that yakko was breathing down his neck about it. he was taking up the oxygen, and there was barely any left for wakko. he just wanted to get to school already.

he felt another blow to his stomach as he realized the escape for him was now his sister’s hell.

~

“you’re not gonna play your tunes?” 

dot shook her head as she zipped up her sweater and put up her hood. she really just wanted to be left alone under the covers. she didn’t want to watch yakko work all day. it would have been better if she could just stay in the starbucks all day, but apparently that was gone now.

“alright,” yakko said with a sigh as he pulled into the street. “get your sad feelings out now. there won’t be any room for that when we get there.”

“i really doubt that,” she mumbled, and then she cringed at the soft guitar sounds playing through the speaker. “change the song, it’s not helping.”

yakko glanced at her once and then obliged. apart from the music, it was pretty quiet on the ride to target. again, it was wildly out of the ordinary, but yakko was determined to get his sister back to her regular peppy self by the end of the day.

whenever good things happened, dot would ride the high for days. it only made sense that it was the same case when bad things happened too. it was just so painful to see her at such a low. yakko couldn’t even remember her - or wakko, for that matter - being so upset when they bounced between the streets and group homes. heck, there were even pretty bad weeks on the movie lot too!

so again, why did this feel like a massive rift? why did this feel like such a huge deal? one day, all three siblings were okay, and the next it’s like sitting in a room that’s been set ablaze. what’s next? eviction? getting fired? cps barging in and -

no. yakko didn’t let himself finish that thought.

“we’re here~!” he sang when he finally pulled into the parking lot.

dot barely said a word as she took off her seatbelt.

the sunlight she walked into felt as if it was mocking her. the sky was so clear and the air was comfortably warm, meanwhile dot felt like she was fading away along with the winter.

the draft upon entering the store was refreshing, but that’s not what caused dot to stop in her tracks. she gasped at the sight of an ulta store, right where the starbucks used to be.

yakko grinned as he looked at his sister. finally, the life was beginning to return to her face. her eyes got that adorable little twinkle as she stepped closer to the establishment.

he followed her as she got in line. the store wasn’t officially open yet, but there were plenty of people already excitedly waiting.

“i’m gonna go clock in,” he said to dot. “ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ annalise told me she’d be here soon. said she’s gonna introduce you to her makeup artist friend. will you be okay by yourself til then?”

dot nodded with enthusiasm, like it had never left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a tiny authors note: so uh. sorry for the wait. thanks to those of you who donated to my ko-fi page! it means so much!🖤 i actually ended up qualifying for ui benefits so i actually don’t need the page anymore😅 other than that, this update took so long because i sort of fell into a depressive episode, and it took all my motivation. all my happiness. all my confidence. everything. but eventually i was able to put all these icky feelings into this chapter, which I’m sure you noticed. if you’re still here, reading my fic and this silly lil note, thank you. your love and support for my little story means more than you know.🖤🖤🖤EDIT: I’m mentally okay enough to post here! that’s why the chapter is later than normal!! trust me I wouldn’t have posted if I was still neck deep in Big Sad☺️


	9. don’t call me kid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> illicit affairs - taylor swift

being neck deep in makeup, perfumes, and skincare was more healing than dot expected. she didn’t even shop for that long either. she only spent an hour inside ulta, talking to annalise and her makeup artist friend, bella. bella recommended only the best products for dot, and gave a more than generous discount at checkout. after that, dot was allowed to go to the employee break room and hang out there until after yakko’s shift was over.

once she was in the car, the very little sleep she got began to catch up with her. she sighed and closed her eyes, silently waiting for the roaring of the engine and the oddly soothing feeling of the car’s vibration.

“there’s no way you’re tired,” yakko said, clearly unaware of his sister’s current mental state of being. “i was on my feet, talking to people for six hours, and i could go for six more!”

“you like doing that, though,” dot replied, keeping her eyes closed.

“and you like looking at makeup. seriously, how are you tired?”

getting annoyed, dot sighed. “i didn’t sleep very well. so exsqueeze me if i’m not a ray of sunshine today.”

“alright, easy.” yakko seemed relatively unfazed. “you gonna play your music?”

“no.” dot put her hood up and turned her head so she was looking out the window.

she probably should have hijacked the bluetooth. listening to queen while her mood began to diminish was weird. it was also weird that her mood was slipping despite having the best shopping spree of her life.

in the moment, she had been elated. one particular eyeshadow palette from morphe made her excited. for a second, she was excited and looking forward to doing her makeup in the morning before school. then she remembered that she had to go back to school eventually.

her eyes flew open at the realization. then, she noticed the route they were on, and her stomach started to hurt.

“where are we going?” she asked, sitting up.

yakko jumped slightly at the sudden move. “someone’s gotta pick wakko up from school.”

“we’re going to school?” the mild panic she felt in her stomach slipped out in her tone. “can’t you just drop me off at the apartment first?”

“no can do, sib. wakko’s already been waiting since before i got off, and your school is on the way home anyways.”

dot folded her arms. “the last thing i need is for everyone who ditched me to see me at my worst.”

yakko glanced at her once. “but this isn’t your worst. we used to live on the street, remember? and besides, it’s not like you have to get out of the car.”

she didn’t say anything to that. she knew he was right, but it didn’t magically get rid of the icky feeling in her stomach. it didn’t make her suddenly want to go to school tomorrow. hopefully the sweet and understanding big brother from this morning will make a return and dot could get out of going.

but a tiny bit of guilt poked at her chest. yes, she has been in much worse situations. she didn’t have a home two years ago, or any friends. she lost her best and only job. so was it wrong of her to make such a fuss over something as silly as a birthday party now? some people didn’t even get to have parties.

_ but neither did i. _

she opened her mouth to say something, but her throat went dry upon seeing the school in the distance. as they got closer to the loading zone, she couldn’t help but scan her eyes across the sea of students, almost like she was actively seeking out anyone who did her wrong.

“c’mon, don’t torture yourself,” yakko told her.

“you’re the one who brought me here - oh!” she turned so she was facing forward again, as if it would shield her from anyone who came close to the vehicle.

yakko looked out to see who was out there, and spotted chessie. she hadn’t seen the car - or maybe she did and was just choosing to keep her eyes glued to her phone. yakko knew there were issues between her and dot in the past, but it still filled him with rage that she didn’t have the gall to show up to the party. they were supposed to be friends.

“not even chessie, huh?” he said.

“i didn’t invite her,” dot replied.

before yakko could wipe the surprised look on his face, the back door of the car opened. wakko climbed inside the car and sat in the middle of the backseat. his presence was good at cutting tension, as it seems.

“okay, he’s here, let’s go!” dot anxiously said, waving for yakko to shift gears.

yakko only obliged because the administrator on the curb started blowing their whistle at him to pull forward. he had to resist the reckless part of his brain telling him to retaliate. he sighed heavily as he steered out of the loading zone, and remained quiet once back on the main road.

“my day was fine, thanks,” wakko said to cut the tension. “i got a C-plus on my algebra 2 quiz. better than i expected.”

“that’s good,” yakko replied. “C’s get degrees!”

“but they don’t get you into grad school,” dot added.

yakko shot her a look. “let your brother have this.”

“it’s okay.” wakko waved it off. “i don’t need grad school.”

in all honesty, none of the warners liked to think about the long term future, even when they lived on the lot. up until a couple years ago, yakko always hated the idea of living a mundane life with a mundane job. going from being a cartoon star to unemployed to homeless to a regular schmoe was a little heavier to carry than he originally thought. dealing with the fact that this was it wasn’t so difficult at first, yakko was just happy to have found stability, but the mention of degrees and grad school and the future of wakko and dot was starting to weigh down on him and he wasn’t sure why.

that dumb breakup song that yakko managed to connect to his own situation was playing again. he didn’t want to spiral down that can of worms again, let alone in front of his younger siblings, so he changed it. same artist, different song.

“leave it here,” dot suddenly said, and she reached over to turn up the volume.

as the song went on, yakko got more into it. maybe the sad things do stick with him. whenever dot listened to songs like these, she was making up stories to go with them. she talked about scripts she wanted to write and star in one day. said she’ll find a bigger and better job than animaniacs.

now, it looked like she was sinking. her eyes closed and her head was tilted back, silently mouthing the words as she took it in.

yakko looked at his brother through the rear view mirror. he was mindlessly swaying to the music, and singing it under his breath. it didn’t seem like he was going to make some off handed satirical comment about it anytime soon. to be honest, yakko didn’t even know that wakko knew the words to this song.

_ “but it dies, and it dies, and it dies, a million little times” _

how was it so easy for all three of them to get sad so fast? it probably wasn’t healthy for them to be wallowing like this, but yakko couldn’t bring himself to change the song. they’ve all been lied to, not just dot. it was so long ago too, six years in june. maybe remembering the day wasn’t such a good thing either. maybe remembering a hundred dollars and some dirt shouldn’t be so hard to forget. but that happened, and now all three siblings walked around with human blood in their veins.

this was probably why dr. rogers had suggested a psychologist.

that thought was discarded as soon as it came. yakko didn’t need a repeat of dr. scratchy, and he was certain the sibs felt the same way.

yakko still thought of him at least once a week and at most once a day.

_ “they show their truth one single time, but they lie and they lie and they lie _

_ a million little times” _

ain’t that the truth. it was so true that yakko had to tighten his grip on the steering wheel. but this wasn’t helping anymore. he was about to hit the button to change the song, but dot finally used her voice.

“and you wanna SCREAM-” she literally began to scream. no really, it made both her brothers jump she was so loud. _“don’t call me kid! don’t call me baby! look at this godforsaken mess that you_ _MADE ME!”_

yakko and wakko looked at each other, both surprised and silently asking each other what to do. dot’s voice cracked as she wailed, and tears were streaming down her face in record time.

thinking fast, yakko took a deep breath and yelled from the top of his lungs:  _ “don’t call me KID!” _

and wakko quickly joined.  _ “don’t call me BABY!” _

and then all three of them were yelling:  _ “LOOK AT THIS IDIOTIC FOOL THAT YOU MADE ME!” _

“ _ you taught me a secret language i can’t speak with anyone else!”  _ dot sobbed.

it was surprisingly cathartic, a big release. yakko hadn’t realized how much he was holding in until it was in the air. but he took a breath and chose not to dwell on it because his baby sister was in distress. with another breath, he took on the last line with a steady tone:

_ “and you know damn well, for you i would ruin myself _

_ a million little times” _

to top it off, wakko let out a loud belch as the song came to an end, effectively lightening the mood. dot looked back at him, upset for a split second, but then she let out a soft laugh and wiped her tears away.

wakko scooted forward in his seat, reaching forward to squeeze dot’s shoulder.

yakko went to hold her hand, letting her know that she wasn’t alone. however, he felt a small sinking sensation in his belly as he began to wonder how to tell dot she had to go back to school tomorrow.

~

“so you’re mindful of what you eat,” said mr. fuller, the school’s guidance counselor. “that’s not a bad thing. most kids your age wouldn’t even try to watch what they eat.”

wakko shifted in his chair, not feeling the reassurance he came in here for. they always said to go to the counselor for anything. the counselor was supposed to help and give advice right?

mr. fuller seemed friendly enough anyways. he was human but he dressed like a toon in the sense that he stuck with the same getup of a button up and bow tie everyday. the only thing that changed was the color. he was animated and funny whenever he spoke at assemblies, and a lot of students seemed to like him. that’s what prompted wakko to go to his office during lunchtime.

now he was kind of regretting this decision. but at least mr. fuller didn’t give him a look of pity or treat him like a car needing repairs.

“you are just watching what you eat, right?” mr. fuller asked after the moment of silence stretched a little too long. “you’re not restricting anything, are you?”

“wha- no! i just…” wakko sighed. “i had to change the way i eat when i got out of the hospital. i got a new diagnosis last week too, so i had to change things even more. and… it sucks.”  _ i hate it, actually. i get nervous when i eat and i get sad. _

wakko didn’t want to say that bit out loud. it made him sound like a baby. maybe he shouldn’t have come in here at all.

“oh, a diagnosis?” mr. fuller asked, perking up a bit. “what exactly is that, if you don’t mind me asking? do you need accommodations or anything?”

“no. i have post pendia- no. post prendal - wait.” wakko paused. it was two large words he had trouble remembering. “my body makes too much insulin when i eat.”

“ah, i see. so a way to treat it is dietary changes.”

“and these pills that make my stomach hurt.” which was why he got so nervous around food lately. he just really hated the feeling of throwing up. it was such an awful feeling, it was like everything he loved was betraying him. 

mr. fuller shook his head in disbelief. “wow, and you’re so young too.”

wakko didn’t really know what to say to that. the doctor told him the same thing, and so did the pharmacist when he and yakko went to pick up his medication. wait til they hear he has diverticulosis too. not that that did anything drastic, though. it only contributed to his stomachaches sometimes, but with that and the medication, who’s to say what’s causing that? maybe he had other health conditions he had yet to discover.

“y’know, both my parents have diabetes,” mr. fuller went on, “and i’m always having to take them to the doctor and i’m always on them about eating right. and one time, my father went into diabetic shock! truly terrifying.”

“that’s not good,” wakko said. “must’ve been hard.”

“yes, that’s the point i’m trying to make. everyone has it hard, wakko. everyone has their stuff, and someone always has it worse. like your sister, for example.”

wakko wasn’t so sure about that. maybe dot hadn’t intended on landing in in-school-suspension, but she liked it as soon as she was there. wakko only knew that because she told him that in confidence.

three weeks went by since her birthday and being sent back to school, and she was still determined to not be seen and perceived by her classmates. wakko couldn’t blame her; he saw the stares and laughs she got at lunch. of course, when she tried to fight back she ended up getting in trouble. it really wasn’t fair, but dot got three days of isolation from those who betrayed her.

“she didn’t hurt anyone,” wakko said, wondering how the hell they strayed from the topic of his health.

“but she still broke the rules.” mr. fuller shrugged. “now she has to sit in a quiet classroom with the other troublemakers.”

again, wakko didn’t think so.

“you should consider yourself lucky.” did this guy ever stop talking? “you’re maintaining your health, and that’s all that matters.”

“my brother told me that.”

“sounds like a wise man.”

maybe. but he would say things like that so often. _ “you’re lucky we caught this now. imagine if we were still on the streets? we never would have known!” “remember that we’ve been through worse!”  _ he said similar things to dot too. it made wakko want to rip his own ears off.

the bell had rung by the time he was out of mr. fuller’s office. wakko missed the entire lunch period, which meant he would have to miss a dose of his medication. no one had to know. well, dot might.

at least he had her, and vice versa. once she admitted to wakko that she didn’t mind ISS all that much, he opened up to her about how he struggled with his eating habits. he didn’t delve too far into it though. dot was the youngest, and he didn’t want her to carry all of his crap on top of her own. but she wouldn’t tell on him if she knew he missed a dosage or two.

besides, what the two of them mostly talked about was how much bullshit these adults gave them. sadly, that included their older brother. that was especially hard because it wasn’t always like this. yakko never took anyone’s bullshit, and now he was handing his own out for free. the warner siblings were always tight knit. it was a three way bond, and it felt unbreakable until recently. now it just felt like wakko and dot versus yakko.

no, that’s a weird way of putting it. the three of them never really fought. wakko would talk back to yakko sometimes, but he didn’t seem to get in trouble for it, apart from having to clean the kitchen after dinner. dot only really fought with yakko when he made her go back to school, and it resulted in getting her phone taken away for a couple of days (it was supposed to be the whole week, but yakko seemed to feel bad and cut it back for some reason.)

and so wakko and dot were left to talk to each other. dot took the time to actually listen to her brother. she picked up on his gradually decreasing mood from the moment he first went to the hospital. not that yakko didn’t notice. he certainly did, but all he would do was remind wakko of how bad they had it before.  _ you should be grateful you have the access to medication at all. _

okay. yeah. that was very true. wakko was definitely happier having his own home with his siblings, and access to food, water, and healthcare. he had friends in school. he shouldn’t be such a baby over his health problems. he’s lucky to get a diagnosis at all, especially at his age where some of these conditions were rare.

but he still felt that gloom and moodiness. no wonder yakko got so frustrated with him. only a crazy person would see all the good in his life and still feel inexplicably sad. maybe that was why wakko had his name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for all the kind words and support on the last chapter🥰🖤 (by the way it’s postprandial hyperinsulinemia🥰)(a bitch is projecting🥰)


	10. my words shoot to kill when i’m mad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is me trying - taylor swift

“never seen you in ISS before.” the human girl followed dot out of the classroom after school, much to the toon’s surprise.

this human girl reminded dot a lot of annalise. except, this girl had short dark hair. that was the biggest difference really. she wore a lot of eyeliner and ripped, black clothing. she hardly looked at dot the entire day, much less spoke. talking wasn’t allowed during ISS.

dot knew the whole point was to force you to think about the wrong you did in the silence, but she actually liked the solitude. she didn’t have to face anybody she didn’t want to for three whole days. well, she earned herself a fourth day after sassing the teacher, ms. mataya. 

“what are you in for?” the girl asked. 

“i threatened james miller with a rubber weapon,” dot replied.

“that was you? do you know how bad i wanted someone to scare the shit out of that guy? he probably deserved it, huh?” 

“oh, he did alright.” frankly, dot didn’t want to get into the nitty gritty of it, but if you asked her if she had any remorse for simply taking her mallet out of her hammerspace to scare some asshole… “i take it you had an experience with him?” she asked the girl.

“he’s the reason behind this.” she attempted to dramatically flip her bob cut, but giggled at the limpness of the dark strands. “i’m jasmine flores.”

“flowers? jasmine flowers?”

she rolled her eyes. “i know, it’s disgusting.”

“disgustingly cute!” dot grinned. “i’m dot warner. pleasure.”

jasmine returned the grin. “i watched your show when i was a kid.”

that was never not a weird feeling, especially as time gets further and further away from nineteen-ninety-whatever.

“so you’re either immortal or way older than you seem,” dot said.

“they were reruns!” jasmine giggled. “but more importantly, you stood up to that asshole james  _ and  _ also to ms. mataya. you’re pretty cool, pink. we should hang out when we’re out of ISS hell.”

that was a less weird feeling. it was actually the best thing dot felt all month. “yeah, sounds great.” she really hoped her joy wasn’t seeping through her pores as much as she felt it overflowing her entire system.

just ahead of the way, dot spotted wakko waiting for her by the main gates. she said goodbye to jasmine and then joined her brother, bouncing in her steps.

he wasn’t as enthusiastic. in fact, he was quite the opposite. his shoulders were hunched as he walked beside his sister.

“what’s with you?” dot asked.

“stomach. as always,” he replied.

she frowned. “i thought the tea was helping.”

“it does a little, but i haven’t felt completely normal in days.”

it was true. the stomach aches from his medication were so exhausting that wakko wanted to fall asleep in class. the chamomile that yakko sent him off with also doubled as a relaxer, so it only added to the sleepiness. wakko felt the most normal by lunchtime, but that was when he had to take his next dose and restart the agonizing cycle.

of course he couldn’t discreetly pop pills in the crowded courtyard, so he finally filled charlie and astro in on his whole health debacle. as expected, he got a punch in the arm from charlie.

“what if you died without telling us?” she asked, annoyed.

“oh, excuse me,” wakko replied. “next time i die, i’ll text you first.”

“yeah, just hope on the voice chat on discord,” astro added. “we never use it, so we’ll know what’s up right away.”

it was better than wakko had expected. while both friends showed a reasonable amount of concern about his insulin situation, they also found humor in it to take off the edge. after lunch, astro took it upon himself to send wakko various memes captioned with _ “when the metformin hits.” _ wakko tried very hard not to burst out laughing in the middle of class.

it was nice that his friends took it well. not too indifferent, not too overbearing. wakko only wished he got this from his older brother as well. all yakko did was breathe down his neck or stay away completely. it was weird. he was weird, but not the fun type of weird he used to be.

like today, wakko rather crankily expressed how much he despised his medication. his stomach was upset from the moment he woke up and he didn’t even want to try eating breakfast, let alone the first dose of the day.

it wasn’t a long conversation. yakko sighed and said it was okay. they had to get going soon.

they still waited an extra twenty minutes for dot to finish getting ready. that was plenty of time for a lecture and sassy backtalk, but yakko didn’t seem up for it today. he just sat on the couch with his eyes closed. 

however, he was much more animated when he pulled up to the loading zone outside the school’s entrance. yakko rolled down the windows, blasting queen’s  _ don’t stop me now.  _ this would normally prompt wakko and dot to dance their way to the vehicle, but neither of the younger siblings were in the mood to entertain their brother. instead, they both kept their heads down and avoided looking at other students and administrators as they got into the vehicle.

yakko didn’t turn down the volume until he steered out of the parking lot, earning a lot of whistles being blown at him and the crossing guards yelling at him. it had been a while since yakko had a bunch of old people angry at him. the rush was healing, it made him smile.

“so how was school?” he asked the all too quiet sibs.

“fine,” they replied in unison.

“c’mon, fill me in! any fights break out? any shitty teachers get what was coming to them?”

“oh, the ISS teacher did,” dot said, perking up. “she told us to do our homework and then i asked how we were supposed to do that if we were pulled from our classes, thus making us unable to access said homework.”

“and what did she do?”

“she gave me an extra day in ISS.”

yakko shot her a look. “dot!” 

“what? am i supposed to be sorry? they expect us to catch up on missing assignments in ISS but they won’t even give us the access to attain them. not my fault the crooked old bird couldn’t answer the question.”

yakko sighed. the warners’ collective track record with rude adults was… not great, depending on how you looked at it. dot was probably right about the ISS teacher, but he still had to put his foot down.

“you know if you get in any more trouble, you’ll be actually suspended?”

dot raised an eyebrow as she glanced at him. “well, i never wanted to go back to school in the first place. maybe it was meant to be.”

he tried again. “okay, you know casting directors look at your whole life, right? not just your talent? what’ll they say when they see in school suspension and poor grades on your permanent record?” then he did his best flawless impression of a new york director. “ay, if she can’t take school seriously, she won’t take this fine production seriously. getter outta here!”

“you don’t know that!” she argued.

“i  _ do  _ know that! remember how much the studio was on us about keeping our grades up with ms. flamiel?”

“that was different-”

“no it wasn’t!” yakko was getting more frustrated the more dot tried to argue with him. “i’m sorry-”

“no you’re not.”

“-but this is how it has to be. just keep your grades up and stay out of trouble, that’s all i’m asking.” 

wakko made a snorting noise in the backseat. “never thought yakko warner would be telling anyone to stay  _ out  _ of trouble.”

“hey, i’m not a fan of it either. and this is an A-B conversation-”

“and i’m C-ing my way into it. pretty bold of you to tell dot to stop getting in trouble when you got the entire school’s faculty mad at you just now.”

_ god, can we go one day without either sib testing me? _

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ what are they gonna do? suspend me? i’m not the one who pulled a mallet on a student.” he shot another look at his sister.

“he deserved it and you know it,” she said back, her tone turning into ice.

sure, she was upset but she would get over it. maybe yakko was a little harsh, but it was because he knew dot could handle it. she was definitely going to get over it.

~

she did not get over it. she was still pressed over - yakko wasn’t even sure what at this point. he just knew dot’s relentless anger was the cause of this.

can you really call it a “rebel phase” if your hair didn’t go through some type of drastic change? yeah, the ends of dot’s bob were blue. a vibrant royal blue that was hard to miss. she didn’t try to hide it when yakko came home from work that weekend. she didn’t even try to show it off, either. that was one reason why it was a bad sign, along with the fact that she didn’t tell anyone she had plans to change her hair.

also, it was  _ blue. _ lots of things have changed with dot lately, but one thing that didn’t was her dislike of cool tones. 

just about everything about this rubbed yakko the wrong way. thankfully, he wasn’t too tired to unpack it, and he sat next to dot on the couch. wakko was nowhere to be seen, which probably meant there was more unpacking to look forward to later.

“that a new top?” he asked.

dot hadn’t even looked at him when he got home. she didn’t say anything for a moment, merely looking down at her white hoodie.

“oh, this old thing? only had it like, a couple months.”

yakko knew that. he was there when he got it for her. he wasn’t there for the hair change.

“oh, and what’s this?” he asked, reaching over to touch her hair.

“it’s you invading my space,” she replied, and the switch flipped. dot rather harshly pushed yakko’s hand away.

well, they didn’t ignore the elephant in the room for as long as he wanted.

“okay, yeesh. first question: why?”

“i wanted to.”

“thought you hated blue.”

“well, things change!”

“did you go to a salon?”  _ meaning, did you leave the apartment unsupervised? _

“no, i did it in the bathroom. the tub is blue now, by the way.”

well, shit.

“so where’d you get the money to pay for it?” he watched her carefully.

she hesitated, but then looked at him as if she didn’t hear him. “huh?”

“come on,” yakko said, “you had to pay for the products somehow. last i checked, you don’t have an allowance.”

“how do you know i didn’t just charm my way out of payment?”

“because that doesn’t work in this world. dot, you have one more chance to tell me before i find out myself.”

once again, she was hesitating, her telltale sign of deceit. “the stuff was gifted for my birthday. you know, my horrible, awful fifteenth birthday that keeps me awake at night in a pool of my own tears?”

yakko stared her down, unable to tell if she was serious or not. he already knew she was lying about how she attained bleach and hair dye, but crying herself to sleep didn’t sound like her. then again, no one seemed like themself these days.

he sighed as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. he broke his gaze to look down at the screen and open his bank app. surely dot wouldn’t start stealing from her brother, and surely she wouldn’t be  _ that _ dense if she was going to start lying about it.

“huh,” he said as he scrolled through his transactions, “i don’t remember spending…  _ seventy five dollars.”  _ he paused, running his hands through his hair. “how…? dot!”

she scoffed. “you think i did that? you think i’m capable of stealing the debit card you left on the counter yesterday? oh my dear brother, i’m too pretty for that.”

“dot, enough of this. it says right here - seventy five dollars at sally beauty.”

“don’t know a sally, sorry.”

frustrated, yakko pinched the bridge of his nose. she was already caught, why keep it up?

after a much needed deep breath, he spoke again. “okay, here’s what’s going to happen. you’re going to clean the bathtub-”

“already tried.”

“-you’re going to  _ stop interrupting me.  _ and you’re gonna clean the tub again and again until it’s spotless. then-”

“no.”

yakko didn’t even miss a beat and stood up from the couch. “alright, then. give me your phone.”

now dot was starting to get fired up. “i just wanted a change! why is that such a bad thing?”

“because you left the apartment when you’re not supposed to - don’t even  _ try.”  _ he pointed a finger at her when she opened her mouth. “you stole my debit card, and now you’re lying about it! you’re spent the last of the money we had for the month!” he couldn’t control the volume of his voice anymore.

and when one starts yelling, so does the other.

“we? who’s  _ we?”  _ dot shot back, steam coming out of her ears. literally. “that’s your money! me and wakko don’t see any of that! what was i supposed to do?”

“that’s not the point! how are we gonna buy our groceries now? what if there’s an emergency and one of us has to go to the hospital again? how are we supposed to pay for that?”

“stop saying ‘we!’” dot stomped her foot on the floor. “it hasn’t been ‘we’ in weeks! the only ‘we’ is me and wakko! you’re not part of that anymore!”

she was avoiding the topic, but yakko couldn’t deny the pang in his chest at those words. he tried not to take it personally, though. he took another deep breath and lowered his voice.

“okay, you’re just saying things because you’re upset-”

but dot interrupted him yet again. “i may be upset but you deserve to know that. it’s you versus me and wakko.”

yakko took a pause.  _ she has to be speaking irrationally, there’s no way there’s a wedge between us. there’s no way i’m losing them. _

_ okay, okay. come back to earth. one problem at a time. _

“again, not the point,” he finally said, his voice very low. his eyes were on the wall behind her. “tell me, if wakko had to go to the hospital again, how would you pay for it?”

“you’re-”

“tell me.”

“but-”

_ “tell me now.” _

dot sighed angrily. “i don’t know, okay?”

“yeah, me either. there’s nothing left for the rest of the month.” yakko still kept his eyes on the wall, using it to keep him grounded, but it was getting difficult. it was hard to control what he was doing, his hands were tingling. “now let’s pretend rent was due tomorrow-”

“okay, i get it!” dot yelled, and of course that agitated yakko even more. “i didn’t think about what i was doing, yadda yadda, it was stupid, blah blah blah!”

it was  _ very  _ hard to control what came out of yakko’s mouth next. he watched dot storm towards her room, and then it just spilled out before he could even think. “you know, i was going to take your phone, but i remembered you have no one to text anyway.”

dot stopped in her tracks at her doorway. she looked back at him, no longer angry. her mouth opened halfway, but then she bit her tongue and went into her room, slamming the door.

yakko didn’t even process what he had said because his legs were taking him to the bathroom immediately after that. he held onto the sink counter and ducked his head down, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to catch his breath. then he looked up and around, trying to find something, anything to keep him planted on this earth.

the sight of the blue-stained bathtub shouldn’t have made him cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I post a lot of my thoughts while working on this fic on tumblr (and i rb animaney tingz as well) so you should follow me if ur interested: hilariouslyedgy 🥰


	11. does anybody know how to start again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> up down - boy epic

yakko was exhausted by the time he was out of the bathroom. this was a time he wished he had his own room to pass out in. he had to pretend like he wasn’t dragging his feet when he entered his and wakko’s bedroom.

as expected, wakko was laying in the top bunk, facing the door. he was wide awake, a solemn look on his face. yakko didn’t need to ask if he heard everything that just went down, the whole fucking building probably did.

but he still had questions for his little brother. he was just too tired to do it standing up.

“did you know what she was up to?” yakko asked as he crawled into his bunk. he didn’t even bother to change into his pajamas.

apparently silence was the only honest answer either sib could give lately. the pit in yakko’s stomach couldn’t get any heavier. he rubbed at his face with his hands, still needing to hear his brother talk.

“wakko.”

“i went with her to the store so she wasn’t alone.”

_they never seem to listen._

“what did i tell you guys about leaving without me?” yakko tried to keep his tone cool and even, but given that dot’s words were still demanding to do laps around his head, it was a little difficult.

“you never would have let her do it,” wakko said back. “her hair, i mean.”

“i would have at a later time when we- _i_ could afford it.” yakko was now very aware of his use of the word ‘we.’ he was the one in charge of the finances… and everything else. “you couldn’t try talking her out of it?”

“hard to change her mind when she’s already decided.”

“that doesn’t make it okay!” his voice finally went up. “let me ask you this: do you care if something happens to you or dot?”

“of course.”

_coulda fooled me._

“what would you have done if someone tried to take you guys? or if cps was at the door again when you got home? am i the only one who remembers the random visit?”

“we still carry our mallets with us, yakko. we know how to get on by ourselves. now it’s my turn to ask a question.”

“this oughtta be good.”

“do you want us holed up here for our safety or because you don’t wanna be left out of mine and dot’s lives?”

yakko could hear the imaginary tire screech and car crash with the way that question hit. “what kinda question is that?”

“one you seem to be avoiding,” wakko said without missing a beat.

yakko sighed and put his pillow over his face. once again, his sister’s words echoed in his head. _it’s you versus me and wakko. there is no ‘we.’_

“have i done something?” he asked, suddenly tossing his pillow to the side. “something to drive you guys away and make you act this way?”

silence again. yakko squeezed his eyes shut, internally thanking the heavens that this conversation was happening in the dark.

“you don’t seem to listen…” wakko timidly said.

“i don’t? but... i know dot’s having trouble with people at school, and you are having trouble with your medicine. i hear you guys,” yakko replied.

“but it’s more than that.”

“what, there’s other things going on?”

“no, i… i don’t know how to put it.”

“look wakko, no matter how bad things seem now, you gotta remember-”

“-it could be worse, and it has been worse. we need to be grateful for what we do have and not focus on what we don’t. _i know.”_ that was the first time wakko’s tone changed. he didn’t sound angry, or upset. he sounded more defeated. 

yakko told himself that when he felt himself slipping. he counted on his fingers the things he needed to be grateful for when he was locked in the bathroom. it seemed to bring him back down to earth (aside from singing the nations of the world) until he felt like himself again. he had to admit it was getting harder to get out of that panicked headspace these days.

not to mention, wakko’s question did stir something within the eldest warner. sure, yakko missed the sibs while they were at school or at a friend’s house. but it had to be that way. he had to work to keep everything they have afloat and they had to go to school. besides, it’s not like either of the sibs miss him these days. they do everything without-

_oh..._

~

in the time yakko has known annalise flores, he’s never seen the inside of her apartment. he also didn’t expect her to invite him into her living space. that’s not to say they didn’t trust each other. they usually went to restaurants or sat in the car eating fast food when there was time during lunch or after work. annalise was also the one to teach him the word “anxiety,” and after some research, yakko confidently determined that he had some of that stuff.

she also helped him through that panic attack a few chapters ago, you know the one. they didn’t really talk about it after, though. they almost never talk about things that sensitive in nature. it’s just always been that way. that’s why it was a little odd that annalise invited him over to her place, because it felt just a bit personal.

however, yakko quickly discovered that annalise also invited her makeup artist friend, bella santiago. despite working in the same building as her for almost a month now, yakko hadn’t properly met the girl before. or seen her.

for one thing, he didn’t know that bella had long dark hair that faded into a vibrant pink. she was also very long and lean and incredibly pretty. she smelled like expensive perfume and her long false lashes tickled yakko’s cheek when she hugged him (albeit a little awkwardly.)

bella was unbelievably quiet, though. she mostly listened and nodded and laughed at the right places as annalise and yakko talked at the dinner table. she was beautiful, but something about her seemed… clenched. definitely the shy type.

“so how did you two meet?” yakko asked, opening an opportunity for bella to speak.

but of course, annie-bannanie took the reigns. “through her boyfriend. i knew him in high school. i met bella like, last year?”

“two years,” bella corrected, her eyes on her plate. “i met you like, right after i started dating ethan.”

of course she had a boyfriend. anyone that pretty wouldn’t just be single. yakko wondered if bella’s boyfriend was as quiet as she was. still, he was determined to get this girl fully involved in the conversation.

“i gotta ask - are you part toon? it’s just...” he gestured to the bright pink locks.

humans who are descendant of toons usually end up with some glaring physical trait of that. some could have colorful hair, some could bleed ink instead of blood, and some even have human bodies with drawn outlines.

“oh... uh, no.” bella pushed all her hair to one shoulder and fiddled with the ends. “i colored it myself. i just like having fun hair.” she paused. “your sister asked me the same thing.”

“yeah? she give you a hard time with all the makeup?”

“no, she was wonderful! hell, if she was a little older i’d offer her a job!”

annalise piped up. “yeah, she was also reminding us to remind ourselves that we are beautiful and powerful.”

sounds like the dot he grew up with. good to know she’s still in there somewhere.

“that’s dot, alright,” yakko said, and then everything went up his throat. “i… yeah.” _swallow it down._

but as it turns out, annalise could sense the inner garbage. and she was not one to beat around the bush.

“what’s wrong?”

“nothing, don’t worry about it. i just wonder how people are able to blatantly lie and have no regard for their own safety. also: stealing! what’s up with that?” it came out before he could stop it, living up to his name once again.

to his surprise, bella perked up.

“ooh, i know! spite, necessity, compulsion, a cry for help, et cetera. it all depends on the situation.”

annalise looked at her. “have experience with that, do you?”

but yakko was already letting bella’s words circle his mind. out of spite? yes. necessity? no. compulsion? no. a cry for help? _i don’t know, she seems pretty happy with herself._

“so what happened?” annalise asked him. “who lied? who was stealing?”

“dot. she dyed her hair behind my back.”

she chuckled. “been there.”

“same,” bella said.

“and she stole my debit card to do it,” yakko added. “and denied it when i confronted her about it.”

“ooo, i’ve done that too!” annalise was way too amused by this. “it’s just teenager things.”

“that shouldn’t make it okay!” yakko said, the frustration coming back. “she’s never lied to me before about anything, much less stolen anything from me! and… we really got into it the other night.”

he didn’t like thinking about that argument. he hadn’t mentioned it to anyone, but it was coming out like word vomit. also, he barely met bella today and she was already learning about the woes of him and his family.

but she and annalise were dashing into the kitchen and coming back with three glasses, a wine bottle, and a carton of grape juice. they quickly ushered yakko to the couch in the living room. it was going to be that kind of night. the grape juice was a little patronizing, though.

“ah, juice for the baby.”

“it’s me, i’m the baby,” bella said as she took the carton and poured herself a glass.

“yeah, she doesn’t drink,” annalise said as she popped open the bottle. “but you are. tell us everything.” she put a wine glass in yakko’s hand and then got comfortable on the couch.

well. the more he got to know these women, the more they wanted him to talk about his troubles. he didn’t… love it. for someone who yaks a lot… he was awfully silent for a while.

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ let’s talk about something else first.” he took a hefty sip from his glass, now glad he wasn’t the one stuck with the grape juice.

“ooo, what’s your zodiac sign?” bella asked, already prepared.

that sparked a little conversation. for one thing, he learned that bella was a taurus and annalise was a capricorn. yakko, on the other hand, didn’t know his own. toon birthdays are weird. they’re drawn one day but could be assigned a birthday on a different day by their creator. you could say toons had 2 birthdays sometimes. yakko preferred his assigned birthday for some reason, and that was august 10, which made him a leo, according to the girls.

there was a lot to learn about astrology. further discussion led yakko to learn that he and his siblings were the fire signs of the zodiac, but dot was also a water sign because her birthday fell on a “cusp date.” it was a bit confusing, and yakko would have asked more about it, but annalise was running off to her room.

“while we’re on the topic of divination!” she called over her shoulder. she came back out of her room in a flash, holding a deck of cards. “who wants to be read to filth?”

“oh no, that thing makes me nervous,” bella said.

“nervous is your default setting, boo.”

“touché.”

annalise sat on the floor in front of the coffee table. she set the deck down on the table, shiny black and gold. needless to say, it piqued yakko’s interest.

“what, you talk to spirits now?”

“no,” she replied. “i do dabble, though. you want a reading?”

a chance for some invisible entity to tell yakko about yakko?

“alright, i’ll bite. read me, annie-bannanie.”

with a grin, she knocked twice on the deck and began to shuffle the cards. not even two seconds into it, three cards flew out of the deck, but annalise didn’t pay any mind. she kept shuffling until two more cards flew out.

only one of the five came out face up, facing yakko so he could read the words. _ten of cups._ there were skulls all over, drawn in white. gold nooses between each one. flowers coming out of some of the skull heads. yakko wasn’t that put off by it because that was annalise’s entire… everything. skulls, death, the color black. surely it wasn’t anything bad.

“oof,” she said when she flipped all the cards over. “oh, the tower, that one’s fun.”

it did not look fun. that particular card had a building being struck by lightning. the card next to it had a human heart with three swords piercing through it. there were a few cards with swords on them that looked pretty daunting.

“you said you got into it with your sister, right?” annalise asked, looking down at the spread. she pointed to the heart stabbing card and one with two swords crossing each other. “some hurtful things were said?”

hit the nail right on the head. yakko took a moment to remember the glass in his hand and brought it to his mouth. “mm, go on,” he said when it was empty. he reached for the bottle for a refill.

“it’s created quite a distance within your family.” she pointed to the card with the skull and nooses. “i wanna say it was there already, and it’s between all three of you, not just you and dot. and uh…” she pointed to another swords card, a bunch of them surrounding a small tooth. “you feel stuck, not knowing where to go from here, this and the three of swords also indicate the anxiety it’s giving you.”

this was somehow worse than yakko actually speaking about his problems. he felt very exposed, his face hot and his heart beating fast. he also now knew never to mess with the powers of the universe.

“what about that one?” he nodded towards the tower.

“ah, you need to fix things before it gets worse.”

yakko paused. “so is this rigged or something?”

“spooky, isn’t it?” bella said from the couch.

“it’s not rigged,” annalise said with a chuckle. “you saw me shuffle the cards! it’s just picking up your energy.”

yakko sighed. “well, i can’t imagine things getting any worse.”

“no, no, no.” annalise picked up the toothy sword card. “it’s a simple solution. see, you’re the tooth. it’s so small it can slip between any of these swords. you have a way out.”

there were several tooth worthy jokes in those sentences he could have made, but the card was just taking words from his mouth. it really didn’t feel like there was an easy way out. yakko’s never felt further away from his siblings in his life. neither of them spoke to him this morning. dot still had steam coming out of her ears. wakko didn’t get out of bed, claiming that his head hurt.

it seemed that yakko had been quiet for too long. when he zoned back in, he saw annalise putting the five cards back into the deck and put it aside.

“so what exactly happened?”

“your cards told you the gist of it. hurtful words, distance, feeling stuck.” the word vomit began again. “i just don’t understand how we ended up on opposing sides. we used to all be on the same page: content with what we have because things have been worse. now, they get agitated over everything, even over things we didn’t have a couple years ago, like food and friends!”

annalise did a double take. “what do you mean food?”

it suddenly dawned on yakko that he had never told her about his years on the streets. that was just something he would rather forget than take the piss out of. 

“long story,” he said, waving it off. “the point is now it’s like they’ve forgotten about the worse things. i try to remind them so they can know how much better it is now. but wakko is getting weird about eating, can you believe it? and dot is out here actively trying to get expelled!”

both annalise and bella shared a look. that was never really a good sign. 

“for context,” annalise said to the pink haired friend, “his brother was in the hospital for a bowel obstruction, and has other gastrointestinal issues now. his sister was stood up by all her friends on her fifteenth birthday.”

bella gasped.

“am i being too hard on them?” yakko asked. 

“well…”

“i wouldn’t say hard,” annalise replied. “i would say you’re seriously undermining their pain.”

at least she was honest. even if it stung a little, and it _definitely_ stung.

“but-“ 

the girls made several disapproving noises to stop him.

“my boy, nobody likes hearing that things could be worse!” annalise told him.

“but it has been worse! we’ve…” yakko trailed off. he was already taking out one load of laundry, he didn’t need the entire wardrobe on the table.

“i know, but i…” annalise did the same, pausing and folding her arms.

it seemed that they both had things to air out, but neither wanted to speak up. yakko silently grabbed the bottle, refilled his glass, then her’s, and they clinked.

bella looked back and forth between the two of them, watching them drink to avoid talking. then she took a deep breath. “so, you don’t want help with your siblings?”

yakko almost choked on his wine. “i didn’t say that.”

“then what were you going to say? _y tú también, anna!”_

she waved it off. “oh, i don’t do the deep, sharing traumas thing.”

“how do you have a boyfriend? nevermind,” bella said. “look, you’re both clearly referring to things that you probably haven’t shared before. but you guys are friends, right?”

“have been for two years,” yakko said. “right, annie-bannanie?”

“oh yeah, you called me lisa when we first met! what was up with that?”

“i like nicknames! i was testing the waters!”

“wow, you guys are really bad at this,” bella said. “or maybe it’s me? should i leave so you guys can talk about this?”

annalise and yakko quickly reassured her. it’s not bella, it’s just the mortifying ordeal of receiving sympathy. still, a silence fell among them again and despite being a few glasses in, yakko was not going first on this one. too much to unpack, and not enough alcohol… or time. (this chapter’s gotta wrap up at some point!)

“okay, i’ll volunteer myself!” bella interjected, clearly impatient. then she took another deep breath. “i came out to my parents when i was fifteen and they were so awful i moved out and lived in my car! i have three anxiety disorders and an alcohol problem due to this! okay, who’s next?”

the other two were stunned. it did help the mood a little. the glass ceiling was shattered, and now yakko had to voluntarily walk on the pieces. but of course he didn’t do it right away.

“should… should we not..?” he asked, pointing to his glass full of the devils juice.

“it’s fine, i’m three and half years clean, i can handle myself!” bella rather impatiently waved it off.

and now yakko was out of distractions. soon enough, he was telling the tale of getting kicked out of the warner bros lot, the unveiling, and living on the street. mind you, he went through another glass of wine to get through it without properly feeling the vulnerability.

“well, fuck,” annalise said afterwards. “now i’m sheepish.”

“hey, i had to do it, now so do you!” yakko told her. he set his empty glass down, feeling more light than embarrassed at bearing his soul. he tested his chin in his hand and grinned at his friend.

“okay, fine!” she sighed and drained her own glass. “going back to the thing with your kidlings - i have a history of GI issues: ulcers, IBS, and diverticulitis. technically i shouldn’t be drinking, but a bitch is in her early 20s, so _que vas a hacer?_ a bitch also had post surgical depression, which yes - that’s a thing that exists! a bitch also has food related anxiety, which i assume is what your brother is going through. so when he tells you that he’s having a hard time coping with it you need to _listen.”_

sometimes you think you know someone. annalise seemed to so strong and unbreakable all the time. but how would she know to be strong if she hadn’t known pain? at the same time, knowing annalise, as well as wakko and dot, have gone through things that caused them pain made yakko want to just put them all in his pocket and keep them safe. why do bad things happen to good people?

“oh-“ yakko tried to say, but annalise quickly went on.

“as for your sister - from a psychological point of view, teenagers need friendship and social interaction in order to function. that was taken from her, and it’s clearly affecting the way she thinks and behaves. given that it’s been just over a month since that happened, it’s safe to say it’ll fuck her up for a bit.”

“so what do i do?” yakko asked.

“let her be angry,” bella said. “at any age, being left alone on your birthday fucking sucks.”

“yeah,” annalise said. “and same with wakko too. none of his stuff is easy to deal with alone. while things have been worse for you guys in the past, you need to accept that that doesn’t change what’s happening now. you need to accept that things can still go wrong.”

that last part had been living in yakko's head for a while, but having it brought out to the real world just sucked the air out of his lungs. at least when they lived on the streets, they never fought this bad. at least while on the streets or foster home, yakko knew the sibs trusted him and vice versa. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there were more world building tidbits I wanted to put in there but I had to cut them out bc ✨editing and proofreading✨ also hello new character bella! she’s a nervous baby but i think she did well on this social interaction!


	12. can’t touch the stars or make them shine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ghosts - banners

it took both bella and annalise to get yakko home very late that night. he was insistent on going home rather than spending the night, so annalise drove his car, and bella followed them in her own to the apartment. after that loaded conversation, yakko wanted nothing more than to sink into his own bed.

“think bella was weirded out by… all that?” he asked. if he didn’t have so much wine in his system he wouldn’t have thought twice about it. if he didn’t have so much wine, he wouldn’t have unloaded so much to begin with.

“no,” annalise replied. unlike her equally emotionally stunted friend, she was more sobered up. “the fact that she told you about her anxiety issues says a lot. she got comfortable pretty quick. i haven’t seen that happen with her in a while.”

“she was still pretty quiet.”

“that’s bella for ya.”

yakko grinned. maybe he’ll stop at that little makeup store before clocking in.

they got to his apartment at the stroke of 2AM. annalise pulled into the designated spot and then killed the engine. bella’s car was a couple of spaces behind, waiting. but annalise didn’t leave right away; instead she looked at her friend.

“look, i can listen to you talk about your family things all you want, if that’s our thing now,” she told him.

“don’t worry, it was a one time thing. remind me not to drink wine again,” yakko replied as he took off his seatbelt. his body was starting to feel light and noodley.

“seriously. a lot of it is out of my range. if wakko wants someone to talk to about all the digestive crap, i am more than happy to have a chat with him. other than that, i’m not sure how to help you other than-”

“you didn’t hear it from me, annie-bannanie, but you help by being my friend.”

annalise chuckled. “yeah, we’re keeping you away from wine. anyways…” she reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out a few business cards. “two of these are my old psych professors who have a practice-”

“i prefer p-psychs who are experts.”

“i’m gonna kick your ass. the other one is the therapist i currently see. i’m not telling you what to do, i’m just pointing you in the direction of people who might be able to help with your issues.”

yakko took the cards and quickly looked them over. “thanks, ‘lise!”

“i’m gonna fucking kill you.”

he honestly had a thought to dump the cards as soon as he was in the apartment and away from annalise, but instead left them on the kitchen counter after stubbing his toe on it in the dark.

the only light in the apartment was the nightlight plugged in next to the bathroom. both sibs were probably asleep. it’s not like either of them would wait up for yakko at a time like this. he didn’t even try to check on them, worried he’d accidentally wake them up. he wouldn’t know what to say now, the wine would probably just take the wheel.

all he did was yak all night, and yakko felt his body melting into the couch cushion. his arms stretched down to the floor, and his neck was slowly elongating as well. his eyes were fluttering shut and then-

_knock knock!_

and just like that, yakko was on his feet again. he would have let it pass, given that it was well into the night and he was quite intoxicated, but he heard a very familiar female voice outside.

“let go of me! what am i gonna do? run from my own home?”

yakko turned on the lamp next to the couch and went to open the door. lo and behold, there was wakko and dot standing on either side of a police officer who was holding their shoulders. wakko offered a toothy grin upon meeting his brother’s gaze, while dot simply turned her nose up.

“are you yakko warner?” the officer asked.

“who wants to know?”

“i found these two wandering by themselves around the ampm down the street. claimed they live here. these your kids?”

yakko looked back and forth between the two, wanting to be surprised by this. one part of his mind wanted to ask the officer if he could keep them at the station overnight, because how the hell else are they going to get it through their heads that actions have consequences? but isn’t that what they’re supposed to do anyway? 

“they’re my siblings. i’m responsible for them,” he said after a pause long enough that made both siblings give him cautious looks. “i hope they didn’t give you too much trouble.”

“a bit mouthy,” the officer told him as he let the little ones go. “but they weren’t doing anything illegal, they were just unsupervised and i was concerned. if you please, i’d like to speak to you privately.”

“sibs, go to your rooms,” yakko said as he stepped aside from the doorway.

wakko and dot quickly scurried off, not wanting to face anymore scrutiny from authority figures. yakko put on his best sober face and tried to talk to said figure.

“look, thank you so much from bringing them-”

“i had half a mind to take them to the station and call social services,” the officer told him strictly. “but as mouthy as those kids were, they seemed genuinely afraid when i caught them, like they didn’t want to be seen.”

a strike of fear went through yakko’s chest. if this officer had been a slightly bigger shithead, yakko might not have even noticed the sibs were gone until the morning.

“we’ve had a run in with cps before,” he said. “a couple of random visits after someone made a false claim. they were terrified they’d get taken away, but clearly not enough since they went out on their own.”

“well, i pointed out a suspicious looking group of people to them when i had them in the car,” the officer said. “they were giving ‘em looks, like maybe they wanted to snatch the kids. seemed to spook them enough.”

that wasn’t reassuring in the slightest. if the cop hadn’t been there… yakko’s heart began to race. he had to hold the door to keep himself steady.

“but they made it home safely, and hopefully this sneaking out thing doesn’t become a habit,” the officer reassured, though he didn’t sound very comforting. “so don’t let it become a habit.”

with that, he bade yakko a good night and was off. that was the second time yakko had gotten away with being drunk in front of an authority figure. he was way too lucky and he knew it.

“alright, i know you guys aren’t asleep,” he said when he closed the door. “you can come out now!”

both bedroom doors opened, and the sibs came out. wakko seemed to be bracing for impact, his shoulders tense and his head hung. dot had her head held high and walked with grace out to the living room.

yakko took a breath. “what the hell, sibs?”

“we just-” wakko tried to say.

“no. i’d rather not hear that you were hungry and there was nothing to eat. just give me your phones. no tv, no video games, no friends for two weeks.”

“are you drunk?” dot asked, mildly amused.

“three weeks?” yakko offered. then, when she rolled her eyes, “yeah keep rolling. at least i know you’re listening.”

she and wakko retrieved their devices from their hammerspaces and handed them over.

“not like i have anyone to text anyway,” dot echoed.

yakko really needed to talk to her about that, but again… _wine._ well that, and dot was getting steam out her ears again. it was time for bed. yakko reached into his own space to put the phones away, ready to call it a night when he heard a thud behind him.

both phones were on the floor. yakko turned in an odd, clumsy circle, and then felt more things falling from behind his back. his wallet, his mallet, keys, important documents and an assortment of anvils spilled out onto the floor.

“what the-” wakko almost said.

“well,” yakko said, looking down at the mess on the floor, “a wise man once said: you know those days where you’re like ‘this might as well happen?’”

~

it was amazing how much yakko let slip through his fingers five years ago. how many things he overlooked because ‘oh we’ll be back in the tower before we know it!’ every day since the unveiling, he felt more and more like some idiotic fool. the way he just listened to every exec and scratchy without questioning it because he was so convinced he and his sibs were taken care of. no one’s taken care of them in the past, why would things suddenly be different? he didn’t even bother to look into the long lasting side effects of the unveiling, he didn’t look into the extra changes of becoming part human.

he didn’t know there were physical symptoms of an unveiled toon dealing with stress. yakko had spent a good twelve hours convinced that he had permanently lost his hammerspace due to the unveiling, until dot reminded him that google exists. the list of symptoms hit all the nails in the coffin: increased anxiety or panic attacks, upset stomach, losing creativity, exhaustion. symptoms for stressed toons include: stretchy limbs, back aches due to hammerspace loss, steam coming out of ears, migraines, and rain over the head.

it was safe to say all three warners were pretty stressed. wakko complained of headaches so bad that yakko had to pick him up early from school a couple times. that could just be the medication, though. but dot only ever had ear steam at the time of an argument, not after. she claimed she didn’t get that anymore, but the tufts of fur around her ears were constantly frizzy.

of course yakko tried talking to her about the argument. he tried to apologize, explain that what he said to her was uncalled for.

“i’ll say,” she replied, and she’d get on with her day.

dot was well past the point of crying and lashing out. she carried herself the way she was trained to during the movie lot days. of course she never followed the media training unless it was convenient for her. she was just tired of being so pissed off all the time... at yakko, at the birthday party, at her stupid teachers. she thought holding it together and silently living her life would taper off the steam - literally. 

her teachers constantly told her to “stop that” even though some of them were toons who surely have experienced the same thing. as if she had any control over it. voluntarily, she could stop it for a moment, but it was like trying not to blink. 

it was easy to guess that getting over what happened with the party and then yakko would get rid of the ear steam. but the anger and sadness was never ending. if she paid attention to it, the feelings would never stop. she didn’t try to talk to yakko more than she needed to or else she might pummel him. any reminder of the party still had the ability to ruin her day, and she saw plenty of those reminders every day at school.

if she didn’t have jasmine, dot might have cut a bitch by now. see, jasmine was one to encourage things like “murder is okay!” anytime dot told her what dumb thing james miller said that day, jasmine responded with “kill him” but she also said that to all her friends. call it reverse psychology, but it made dot want to steer her in the right direction. fun dynamic for the story, no?

and yes, jasmine had other friends. on the first day out of ISS, she invited dot to sit with her group at lunch. dot was delighted and happily accepted. their usual meeting area was in the grass next to the lunch tables. it was like a cute little picnic but with four goths and a lot of gross school lunch. these friends took a liking to dot really quick.

“you were caught by the _police?”_ asked seth, one of said friends. he was a sophomore, and freakishly tall. he also had neon green hair that didn’t look like it was from the box.

“damn pink, you’re more badass than i originally thought,” said jasmine.

“what happened after that?” lucy egged on. another sophomore, blonde and short. she was on the dance team.

“he took us home,” dot replied. “we were just down the street. woulda been pointless if he took us all the way across town when our brother was literally right there.”

truth be told dot was shaking the entire two minute ride back to the apartment. the regret hit her like ice water and thoughts of getting separated from yakko and wakko plagued her mind. and the way yakko looked at her and wakko without saying anything! it was almost like he was going to let the police take them away! dot hadn’t been so scared since the day they were kicked from the lot.

she would never say this out loud, though…

“what were you even doing?” asked hazel, the lilac haired freshman. “how do you get caught by the police when you’re at a gas station?”

“wakko wanted a hot dog… at two in the morning.” his appetite would come back at the strangest times, but dot wasn’t about to make him feel weird about it.

“he a stoner or something?” seth asked.

“nah, he’s just hungry.” dot decided to change the subject. “where do you get your hair done? i love how vibrant it is!”

“oh, i’m half toon,” he said. “this green is all natural.”

then she turned to hazel.

“same here,” she told her. “i wouldn’t have picked lilac. my mom won’t let me dye my hair, you’re lucky you got yours done.”

“yeah, i didn’t ask permission, i just did it.”

dot was grinning as she said it, but it really made her feel some kind of way. now it just reminded her of the argument with yakko. he was never that angry over anything. he was never mean when he was mad, either. dot felt bad about going behind his back, but she also felt sick and upset when she remembered how the conversation ended. it was an exhausting cycle.

“i need your guys’ opinion on something,” she said after a moment, and she reached into her hammerspace.

“yeah, the smoke in your ears ain’t a look, hun,” hazel said, followed by laughs from the others.

“well there go my dreams of being a humidifier! look at these.” she pulled out the business cards she found on the kitchen counter and passed them around.

the four friends took turns reading each card, each of them confused.

“what? therapy recs?” seth asked.

“i think my brother’s gonna send me and wakko to one of those guys.”

“you say that like it’s a bad thing, pink,” jasmine told her, reading over one of the cards. “callie cohen, for example, is an excellent shrink.”

“i don’t wanna go to a shrink, or an expand, or a p-psychiatrist. they just try to change you to fit their mold. and then they try to take you to the circus and act like some father figure in your life only to inevitably stab you in the back.”

a silence fell between the group. all four of them stared at dot with their mouths half open.

“oh, you got trauma,” lucy said like she was finally catching up.

“okay, okay,” jasmine spoke up. she placed her hand on dot’s shoulder. “look, just tell your brother you’re not doing the therapy thing. _but_ if you end up having no choice, this is your gal.” she held up the callie cohen business card.

dot took the card back, as well as the others. “how do you know?”

“ya girl’s been seeing her for a few months. one of my cousins sees her too, and recommended her. probably the only good that relative’s done for me.”

“oh you got trauma too!” lucy said a little too excitedly.

“bro, shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *looks at chapter* we don’t have time to unpack all of that. anyways thanks you guys for allllllllll the love and support on this fic, I’m glad y’all are enjoying it 🥰 so a couple things: I’m on twitter (@hollaestor) and sometimes I shout into the void so follow me there if you want n come say hi. secondly, since every chapter is a line from various songs, I am in the process of compiling a playlist and I’ll be posting the link on the next chapter if anyone’s interested in that! finally, I have a list of headcanons for this fic, just a bunch of little things that I couldn’t fit into the main story. I was wondering if anyone was interested in seeing that list so I can either put it on tumblr (hilariouslyedgy) within the next few days OR I can just post the list here AFTER the story’s over. only thing is idk when this story is gonna end so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ let me know?


	13. what if i’m someone i don’t want around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! i made the playlist for this fic, it’s linked in the chapter, first paragraph 😅 I will add a new song every time I finish a chapter, so it’ll be like a little hint to what comes next! I also posted the list of hc’s on tumblr (hilariouslyedgy) linked on my pinned post! anyways the song choice for this chapter is:
> 
> falling - harry styles

[“i don’t](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7hvsGDHf3Y8XE5YMeClSfT?si=ImvTcpfgQjGwII7lvgk0Aw) want a repeat of doctor scratchansniff,” wakko said, flipping the cards over in his hands. “he was nice, but he always looked at us funny.”

“i know,” dot replied. “like we were unfixable or something.”

of course she took this to her brother. he had to know what the other brother was up to: making plans to send them to some new p-psychiatrist. he really was one of the adults now, trying to get the kids to behave and act certain ways because they were too much of an inconvenience. it was sad to see, really.

“jasmine told me therapy wasn’t that bad,” dot said after a moment. “this one-” she took one of the cards and read the name “-callie cohen is pretty good, i hear.”

“you’re considering it?” wakko asked, surprised.

“hey, yakko’s probably going to force us to go, and make us feel bad about feeling bad about it. we might as well pick who we’re gonna get stuck with.”

wakko had to agree with that. then, he scrunched one eye shut in pain, feeling the pounding sensation in his temple. reading the tiny font on these cards was not helping the oncoming migraine. he got up from the couch and went to the bathroom to retrieve the tylenol, but the door was locked. yakko had been in there for the better part of an hour with the shower running. honestly, wakko was too tired to knock and yell, so he sighed in defeat and went back to the couch.

“the hell does he do in there?” dot wondered.

“enjoying the time alone before he has to deal with us again,” wakko said as he lied down on the cushion, staring up at the ceiling.

“when did our dear brother become the very thing he hates?”

dot would have turned on the tv, but that wasn’t allowed. her homework was already done, and she couldn’t exactly attempt to clean the tub again since it was occupied. she wasn’t even allowed to go on auditions. she just had to sit with her thoughts, like in ISS.

her ears were blowing steam within minutes. this was getting ridiculous.

eventually yakko came out of the bathroom, running a towel over his head. dot tapped wakko’s leg to get his attention. it was time.

yakko wasn’t oblivious to the room’s energy. he removed the towel from his head and met the gaze of his siblings. they stared each other down for an uncomfortable amount of time.

“why do i feel like i walked into an intervention?” yakko finally asked. “do i have a drinking problem i don’t know about?”

upon saying that, his mind immediately trailed to bella. guilt settled in his stomach.

“you do drink a lot,” wakko said with a shrug. “but we’re here because we’re grounded, remember?”

dot gave him a look and then threw the business cards onto the coffee table, letting them speak for themselves.

“huh,” yakko said as he got a closer look, bending down over the table. “y’know, i was wondering where those went.”

“why do you have these? are you going to send us to someone who’ll make us behave? are we not fitting your standards anymore?”

“are you trying to replace scratchy?” wakko asked.

they certainly did not pull any punches. each question came like a bullet to yakko’s chest. he really needed to stop leaving things on the counter.

“annalise gave them to me, and no, no, and no,” he replied. “it’s for me. i’m thinking about seeing a professional.”

of course, the sibs had more questions. why yakko? what did he need to change? was he being forced to see a p-psychiatrist? was he just missing scratchy?

he really didn’t want to tell them about the panic attacks. or the stress. or the thoughts plaguing his mind. he wanted to keep that as far away from the sins as possible. he was the oldest and the one taking care of them, they couldn’t see him at such a low point. that was why he waited to tell them about it, but of course they were just one step ahead of him.

“is it because you spend a lot of time in the bathroom?” wakko asked.

cool, they noticed that.

“yeah, you should go to a regular doctor for that,” dot suggested.

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ i was going to ask if you guys wanted to come along-”

“we already know you’re lactose intolerant, we don’t need to get any deeper than that.”

“i meant come with me to therapy. I’m just not sure who to-”

“callie cohen,” dot said.

“alright then.”

wakko posed one final question. “how are we going to afford it, though?”

~

callie cohen was out of the question. for one thing, her office was all the way in canada. annalise didn’t mention that she got this shrink when she was attending university in toronto three years ago (another thing he didn’t know about her.) the other two options were ruled out as well, because they weren’t covered by the health insurance.

being an adult was really fucking annoying.

at the same time, yakko took a sigh of relief. since no one was forcing him to see a shrink, it left plenty of room for him to procrastinate going through with it. wakko and dot didn’t bring up again either, so it was much easier to assume that seeing a p-psychologist was out of the question for now.

yakko did go to his regular doctor about the stress, though. the doc offered antidepressants on the spot, but yakko refused them. it would really set things in stone, and he wanted to put off crossing that bridge. the next suggestion was seeing a p-psychiatrist, a person who would be much more qualified at picking a medication for him. yakko refused that as well.

speaking of medication, he asked about wakko’s metformin problem. the doctor couldn’t change the medicine altogether. instead, he instructed that wakko cut down his dose to once a day.

wakko wasn’t happy about that.

“i wanted to stop the medicine,” he said glumly from his bunk. despite the awful side effects the metformin had given him, yakko still made him take them as instructed. why? because-

“you still have postprandial hyperinsulinemia,” yakko told him. the way the words rolled off his tongue so effortlessly like he was the one living with it. “you gotta treat it unless you wanna end up with type 2 diabetes.”

wakko responded the only way he knew how these days: he put his pillow back over his head to block out the light and sound. moving his head at all only agitated the ache in his temples. it was so bad it radiated into his mouth, even after taking some tylenol.

“hey,” yakko said, tapping his brother’s bunk. “you’ve been at this for almost a month, and you’re doing great. you’re a third of the way there!”

wakko moved the pillow so his nose and mouth were out in the air. “it’s only been eighteen days, actually.”

“you’ve been counting?”

“yes,” he huffed.  _ because eighteen days ago was when i last had a meal without any trouble. it’s been eighteen days since i felt normal… like myself. _

every time wakko counted the days, several questions circled his head. it’s been eighteen days since he was himself, but then again… who even was he to begin with? “the guy who eats?” “the guy who packs away the snacks?” no, outside of that. what does wakko warner even do besides eat?

he tightened his grip on his pillow, grateful that yakko couldn’t see his face.

honestly, wakko wanted to be surprised that his brother didn’t hear him on the nights when those questions became a little too much, a little too loud. but yakko seemed distracted all the time these days, like he was on another planet. wakko could say the same for himself, he wasn’t entirely there anymore. he felt like a parody of himself, like a stand in was playing the part while the real wakko hid deep inside his own head.

when he first met his friends, they used to dare him to eat whatever concoction they could make from their lunch leftovers. wakko loved it. other students loved to watch. the worst thing he ate was hot cheetos in a ziploc bag full of chocolate milk and apple juice with pieces of the hot cheetos bag sprinkled on top. wakko swallowed it whole, and the worst thing that he got from it was a small tummy ache.

nowadays, charlie and astro didn’t dare him to eat anything anymore, knowing and understanding why he could no longer take on things like that. thankfully, the other students were quick to get over that too, especially after the time james miller came along with a half eaten sandwich from the trashcan.

charlie, the badass girl she is, took one for the team and shoved it into her mouth before james could grill wakko about it. astro, the equally badass guy, loudly brought the attention to charlie for the same reason.

as amazing as his friends were, wakko still wished he would have been able to eat the disgusting food. not because he was hungry, but because he wasn’t good at anything else. he wasn’t good at his classes, he wasn’t even first chair in orchestra. he wasn’t good at video games, or even just talking to his friends.

wakko was described as “the quiet friend.” as far as he knew, quiet friends didn’t really do much but sit and watch, listen. they’re just there, and for what?

_ am i even someone people want to talk about? do my friends or family think of me when i’m not around? would anyone notice if i just disappeared? _

he didn’t quite remember sleeping that night. he wished it was just one more day further into the week, then he would just be able to shut off his alarm and sleep the day away after inducing another migraine.

his head didn’t hurt in the mornings. it always started that way. he got out of his bunk, finding yakko’s empty below. he seemed to be waking up earlier and earlier these days, but that made it easy for wakko to avoid the “how’d you sleep” question. 

_ wish i still was asleep, honestly. _

after getting dressed, he went to the bathroom, but the door was locked. again. with a heavy sigh, he pounded on the door with his fist.

“yakko! you’re the one always hounding us about being on time!”

no response. only the sink running.

wakko turned away with a sigh, only to find dot coming out of her room. they didn’t say anything to one another, only making tense eye contact. then, they were both sprinting to the kitchen, pushing and shoving each other in the process.

“i get first dibs!” dot told him.

“i have to take my medicine!” wakko argued. (no, he didn’t want to take it. he just wanted to win.)

dishes clashed as they both got their hands on the last clean bowl. an unopened box of cereal fell out of the cabinet, hit the counter and then the floor. the siblings were in a tug-of-war/yelling fight until dot let go with a wicked grin. wakko went flying to the floor, landing on his butt. he had let go of the bowl too, and it shattered on the floor.

that was the perfect time for yakko to leave the bathroom.

“dammit, sibs!”

his footsteps went quick across the floor, and then he was in the kitchen.

“it was an accident!” dot quickly tried to explain.

“you knocked me over!” wakko said.

the yelling recommenced, leaving yakko to pinch the bridge of his nose and irritably tap his foot. 

“can we please go one day without chaos?” he muttered. first an anxiety attack woke him up twenty minutes before his alarm, and now this.

but before he could step in and diffuse everything, the sound of the doorbell silenced the siblings. the doorbell was never soothing.

“clean this up,” yakko told them, pointing to the shards of ceramic on the floor.

then he turned on his heel and went for the front door. who could possibly turn up at a quarter to eight in the morning? it had been too suspiciously long since the last CPS visit, it would make sense for chesthair o’whatever-the-fuck to make a comeback.

but it wasn’t some guy in a suit. it was a woman, and a beautiful one at that. brown hair, bright blue eyes. little black dress with a pretentious scarf. her eyes filled with recognition as soon as yakko opened the door, but her face was solemn and she tightened her grip on the purse slung over her shoulder.

“are you lost, miss? because heaven is a long way from here,” yakko told her with a quirk of his brow.

“oh my god, you really are like that,” the woman replied, and then she shook her head. “um. my name is idalina von scratchansniff.”

yakko did a double take. “did, did you say-”

“yeah. scratchansniff. can i come in? it’s important.” she didn’t sound kind or amused in any sense.

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ-”

“oh my god, you actually do  _ that  _ too,” she said to herself.

yakko pushed his tongue in his cheek. “look lady, i hate to break it to you, but scratchansniff’s are not allowed in this apartment.”

“it’s about my father, otto. he…” idalina took a pause, looking away for a moment. “he died last night.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ 💋 goodnight everybody!


	14. this has broken me down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "you knew it still hurts underneath my scars from when they pulled me apart  
> but what you did was just as dark  
> darling this was just as hard  
> as when they pulled me apart" -taylor swift, hoax
> 
> cw: panic attacks, funeral and death

“how did it happen?” dot asked, her voice steady.

she let idalina into the apartment after noticing that yakko went all spacey and quiet. he was never that silent. idalina had to repeat the tragic news, and that struck the other two siblings as well, though clearly not as hard as it did their brother. dot and wakko sat on either side of idalina on the couch while yakko remained leaning against the front door.

“otto had been sick for a while,” idalina explained. “i guess he took a bit too long to get to the doctor because by the time he was diagnosed, there was nothing they could do. he was given a month, lasted two and a half.”

“i’m so sorry,” dot told her. “can’t imagine how hard it must be.”

she made eye contact with wakko, who had tears in his eyes. they had the same thought in mind, but didn’t know how exactly to word it without sounding rude.

“i’m mostly here because my mother is in shambles. she wanted to come and tell you guys but it hit too hard…” idalina said with a shrug.

as always, wakko came through with his bluntness. “we didn’t know scratchy had a wife… or a kid.”

a silence fell in the room. yakko still wasn’t mentally there, which was getting scarier the longer he stayed like that. dot looked away from idalina, silently cursing both her brothers’ lack of tact. 

“look, i just came to tell you the news,” idalina said softly as she rubbed her neck. she still hadn’t looked at any of the warners. “and to let you know that the funeral is next saturday if you guys want to come.” she reached into her purse and pulled out a small brochure. “all the details are there. i’m sure he would want you to come.”

“there’s a joke,” mumbled yakko from the door. it was still loud enough that all three on the couch heard him.

dot was stunned and tried to save his ass. “what he means is - we haven’t heard from your father in years. uh, things didn’t exactly end well between us.”

“i see.” idalina nodded once. “well-“

“let me ask you this,” yakko finally spoke up, and approached the human. “if your only reason for coming here was to tell us that daddy kicked the can and to bring a cheaply made order to service - why bother coming at all? why couldn’t this be said over an email…? or carrier pigeon?”

“i don’t know what you mean…”

“why are you here?”

this girl couldn’t hold eye contact for more than five seconds. she silently stood up and went for the door. she took a breath as she put her hand on the knob.

“i was born when he was still on that show,” she admitted. “even after it was cancelled, he stayed on that movie lot. he left me and my mom behind for all of that. i wanted to see a piece of what that entailed, and you guys were the closest thing.”

“well sister, at one point, he left us behind too,” yakko replied without missing a beat.

idalina scoffed and rolled her eyes. “you know when the funeral is. if you see me there, no you don’t.”

and she let herself out.

“still got that charm, eh?” wakko said to his brother, though he didn’t have that pep in his tone.

dot reached for the pamphlet as soon as the door shut. it was just like any old memorial thing. “in loving memory” and all that. seeing his picture was just a little painful, knowing he wasn’t out there roaming the movie lot with psychological advice. he looked exactly the same. white coat, big glasses. he was smiling wide in the photo. it was hard to believe he was gone.

dot cleared her throat. there was already one crying person in the room. “well. now i can break out my little black dress.”

“who said we were going?” yakko asked.

both dot and wakko looked up at him, surprised. he didn’t return their gaze and instead paced around the living room.

“but i wanna go,” wakko sniffled. 

“not a good idea, sib.”

“why not?” dot asked, immediately steaming at the ears. 

“are we forgetting the way he lied to us to get us off the lot?” yakko replied in a tone that matched hers.

“but he _died,_ yakko! it’s different now!”

“yeah, he died,” wakko repeated, his voice trembling.

yakko looked down at him, feeling guilty. he wanted to hug his little brother, but then everything inside would leak out. he was still wrapping his head around it. scratchy's dead. no longer living. yakko repeated it in his head, felt a tickle in his throat, and then his mind went blank. _and repeat!_

needless to say, yakko called off work and school for the day. he also gave the sibs their phones back, figuring they would want to talk to their friends at a time like this.

how do you even go about that? _hey bestie, my p-psychiatrist and colleague from two decades ago keeled over. also we haven’t spoken to him in over five years because he played a part in us getting screwed over. anyways, wanna see my renegade?_

he was leaning against the kitchen counter when dot approached him. she didn’t look angry anymore.

“aren’t you tired of being mad at him?” she asked. “because i certainly am.”

“me too,” wakko said from the couch.

“and…” dot sighed and looked down. “if i had known he was dying, maybe i wouldn’t have been thinking such horrible things about him… the other day i was telling jasmine how selfish he was…”

“i wanted to try and find him…” wakko admitted. “wondering if things had changed… now we’ll never know.”

yakko was looking at the floor as he listened, hands in his pockets. he was scratching his fingers against his legs to keep himself planted on earth. being angry for five, going on six years was a lot. and scratchy was thinking of himself when it all went down. he said it himself, his job was on the line, so to hell with his three most annoying patients. why should any of that change just because he’s dead?

but why did it feel like the entire world had shifted? why did this feel like how annalise’s stupid tower card looked? 

the tickle in his throat came back.

“fine, we’ll go,” he said, rubbing his neck.

then he was rubbing at his chest, and the tightness hit him like a ton of bricks. he felt hot, but he was starting to shiver.

“yakko?” dot’s voice sounded far away.

“i... bathroom…” he mumbled, and tried to take a step. but his legs grew numb, so he slid down the side of the counter and sat on the floor. his movement became more frantic the more he tried to regain control of himself, and soon enough he couldn’t breathe.

_not this. not now. not in front of them._

“what’s wrong with him?” wakko asked, approaching his brother and sister.

“uh, i don’t know,” dot replied, dropping down to sit in front of the very panicked yakko and trying not to panic herself.

neither of the younger sibs could take their eyes off of him. it was bizarre and terrifying at the same time to see yakko in such a distressed state. his eyes were wide and his mouth was half open, trying to get a deep breath in, but he just couldn’t get it. he was fidgeting and scratching at himself, like he was wiping insects off his body.

“you’re not dying, are you?” dot asked him. it was probably stupid to ask, he could barely even walk.

through his wheezing and twitching and frantic movements, yakko shook his head. “panic... attack…”

“wakko, google it!” 

within a few minutes both sibs were telling yakko to breathe deeply, and doing the exercises with him. yakko followed along, his eyes fixed on a spot on the floor. he couldn’t really look either of them in the eyes even if he wanted to.

the more he came back to himself, the more humiliating this got. he was the one who had to keep it together. he had to take care of the sibs, not the other way around. he wasn’t supposed to react to the death of a person who had already been dead to him. he was supposed to hug his brother, who was _still_ crying about it. 

instead, yakko was hugging his own knees. he put his head down, catching his breath.

“hey, it’s okay,” dot said, rubbing his back. “we’re all shaken up at the news.”

it wasn’t even about that at this point. yakko was losing control of everything. he thought he was managing the anxiety thing. he thought he was doing well at keeping it away from the sibs. but they noticed the frequent trips to the bathroom, and now they knew why it was happening.

but they weren’t upset about it. dot continued rubbing his back and telling him everything was okay. wakko was holding his hand and trying to sing to him. comforting as it was, it felt so backwards. so not only was the world shifted, it was upside down too.

“sorry about that,” he said when he was back on earth. his arms were fatigued from clinging to his legs for so long, and he let them fall down to his sides.

“what for?” dot asked. “you’re clearly not okay.”

“and we’re happy to help you,” wakko added.

the emotions were bubbling up in yakko’s throat again, but he was far too exhausted to let it out. “thanks sibs…” he sighed. “i think… i think i’ll try harder to find a therapist…”

wakko and dot shared a look. they agreed it was a good idea.

~

in hindsight, yakko knew he would be worse off if he passed the opportunity to go to scratchy’s funeral. he wasn’t sure where the opportunity lied though; not like he’ll get to talk to the guy.

he was in a semi permanent state of spacey-ness following the panic attack of the century. weird, usually the feeling would fade and he would almost entirely forget what it felt like. this one stuck around for a bit. his breath was short all the time and he was a little more jumpy when people approached him at work.

yakko didn’t tell annalise what had happened, so while she was a little confused at his constant zoning out, she knew better than to question it. he was silently grateful for that. he avoided bella because he was worried she might ask. 

aside from that mess, yakko often caught himself forgetting what happened until it came rushing back. while stocking up the apple products aisle, he wondered if scratchy had any difficult patients since the warners. then yakko remembered that scratchy no longer had patients because he was dead.

he paused what he was doing, shook off the palpitations, and got back to work. only a few minutes later he was wondering if scratchy thought about him or the sibs on his deathbed. or if he talked about them at all in the last five years.

_if he never told you about his family, he probably didn’t talk about you to them either. besides, you annoyed him most of the time._

when his shift was over, yakko was jamming out to dot’s playlist like it was just another day. the realization gave him whiplash. at the same time, doctor scratchansniff was on his mind more often than normal, and yakko wanted nothing more than to surgically remove his thoughts. too overwhelming. gave him a panic attack in the car. he got home late that evening.

on the day of the funeral, he had a pit in his stomach. but he could still function. the sibs were dragging their feet all day, deciding to actually miss the dead guy... pretend like he didn’t screw them over.

that thought only deepened the pit. maybe he shouldn’t be thinking so ill of the dearly departed.

it was an open casket service, but none of the siblings went to get a closer look. they could almost see him from the second row, and that was enough.

it was mostly colleagues, human and toon, who said a few words for the deceased. scratchy’s wife was sobbing the whole way with idalina at her side. yeah, the warners saw her.

anyone who saw the warners was surprised to see them, even more so that they were quiet through the entire service. _“i was expecting more mayhem from you three.” “only you kids can put the fun in funeral!”_ good to see you too...

the most glaring thing was a very large flower wreath by the casket. the sash over it read “from your loving family at warner bros.” of course that sent the warners looking for the fucking CEO during the reception, but he wasn’t there. no the company just sent the flowers to give off the impression that they cared.

what were funerals for anyway? the living? funny. to send the dead off? even funnier. there were loud criers in the chapel, and even at the reception. everyone was still going to be sad after the event, so who was this supposed to be for?

wakko and dot cried a normal amount, and yakko held them as they did so. he waited for his own sting in his throat, for the overflow of emotions that had been demanding to be felt over the week. but it never came.

that’s not to say he wasn’t sad, though. it was a definite change from the ugly heat of anger he usually felt if he thought about it too long. yakko realized he didn’t have to wonder if scratchy would randomly show up on their doorstep anymore… it made his chest burn in a way it never had before. it made a little cloud form over his head.

it wouldn’t have been a huge problem if he wasn’t at work.

“dude…” said shawn, who was at the register. his eyes were wide as he watched yakko stock products in their designated section. 

yakko turned to face his supervisor, but was looking up at the rain coming down on him. “ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ…”

“alright, what’s going on?” shawn asked as he folded his arms. while he was yakko’s boss, he was awfully lenient and rarely put on an authoritative tone. “you’re here, but you don’t act like you’re here. your lunch breaks are much longer than thirty minutes. your hammerspace is gone.”

“how did you-”

“you usually stuff a box or two back there, but you carry them now. ann’s noticed you’re acting off too. and now-” he gestured to the cloud above yakko’s head. “what’s with you man? tell me the truth.”

“well, i would,” yakko said, “but then you’ll send me home, and i can’t afford to miss more work.”

“and what if i ask ann what’s up with you?”

“she doesn’t know anything. look, it doesn’t matter. just give me fifteen minutes to sort this rain out, okay?”

shawn looked at him for a moment, actually considering it. “no. you should just go home. i’ll figure something out with the manager so it doesn’t fall back on you, okay?”

it shouldn’t have rubbed yakko the wrong way. his supervisor was trying to help him. but yakko just dropped the packages of phone chargers he was holding and they cluttered on the floor. then, he kicked the open box at his feet into shawn’s direction before finally walking away. he didn’t even clock out, he just went for the main exit.

he was in tears by the time he reached his car. he frantically climbed into the driver’s side, clutching the steering wheel like a lifeline. _seriously? i’m getting the rest of the day off. what the fuck? why the fuck?_

yakko leaned back in his seat, unable to delay the rush of “dark and twisty” feelings. it hit like a truck every single time. he’s felt this countless times in the last couple of months, but his brain always conjured up the whole _i’m gonna die right here, right now_ schtick. and it was so hard to get out of. 

_i’m never gonna see wakko and dot again… they’re gonna wonder why i never came home… they’re gonna get taken and separated by cps..._

his hands went to his chest, feeling his heart racing under his shirt. then, his hands went up to the sides of his head, trying to will away the dizziness and loud thoughts. if this one didn’t take him out…

there was a tapping on the window, and he jumped. he tried and failed at not looking so terrified at the pink haired woman standing outside his vehicle. much to his panic-ridden surprised, she walked around to the passenger side and climbed in.

“i wanna ask if you’re okay,” she said, “but you’re clearly not.”

if he wasn’t so deep in already, he would have brushed her off. _it’s fine, bells, i can handle it. i’m managing it._ but anything he tried to say sounded like hysterical gibberish. he even tried to make hand gestures to get his point across but it was messy. yakko was messy.

bella nodded, even if she couldn’t understand him. she simply reached for his hand and squeezed it in both of hers, and she spoke calmly. “okay, okay, look at me. or don’t, whatever you’re okay with. just listen to me. hey - you’re perfectly fine. it’s gonna pass, i promise.”

logically, yakko knew this. but logic wasn’t here at the moment. and he definitely couldn’t look her in the eyes. his hand was tingling ominously in hers.

“i think i’m gonna die…”

“that’s just the dizziness. your hyperventilating is making less oxygen go to your brain.”

“oh…”

“trust me, i know how scary it is. just try to take a deep breath, as deep as you can go.”

it was a while before yakko could breathe deep enough to actually calm down. but focusing on that helped him as well. he wasn’t all the way back but he was well enough to whisper the nations of the world to help the rest of the way. bella only listened and continued to hold his hand through the process.

“sorry,” yakko said when he made it past botswana, “it’s just a thing that helps.”

“hey, when i have a panic attack, i have to listen to one direction,” bella told him. “i’m the last person who’s gonna judge you.”

he didn’t say anything for a moment. his torso was shaking, and he was trying to control it. “sorry you had to see all this…”

“again, not gonna judge you. i live and breathe anxiety. actually-” she chuckled to herself. “i had to muster up the courage to actually approach you in your car. because my own social anxiety never seems to take a day off. but i’m glad i was able to do it.”

“me too… i…” he paused, wondering how deep this should get. he was usually locked up in his bathroom trying to do it all by himself. having another person there to remind him he wasn’t batshit crazy was nice. “i just need this to stop happening.”

“do you get panic attacks a lot?”

“started a couple months ago. usually only once a week, but…” he paused, not wanting to bear his soul and bring up the dead scratchy thing. “it’s happening every day now.”

“do you have anyone to talk to about this?” bella asked. she was surprisingly calm and understanding about this.

“annie bannanie... sometimes. ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ…”

“you guys aren’t the talking type,” bella finished for him. “yeah, i picked up on that. well, like i said, i live and breathe anxiety, so i know where you’re coming from. and i know we haven’t known each other that long, but you can talk to me. okay?”

yakko nodded. now he had to figure out how to talk about these things at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanna say sorry for the cliffhanger on the last chapter but,,,,,,,,,,, henny ways i am loving all the support and comments and kudos on this fic :') makes my cold dead heart sing! in all honesty this fic is how i'm coping with various thoughts that live in my brain, so i'm surprised (and glad!!) that i can turn it into something people can enjoy (even if it's a little painful.) and i'm surprised ppl actually like it!! :') as always if anyone has questions or want to see my brainrot and random tidbits and the playlist abt this fic yall can always follow me on tumblr hilariouslyedgy :)


	15. all my love disappeared

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> still have me - demi lovato

the lobby was awfully similar to the ones on the WB lot. there was a receptionist who didn’t look like he wanted to be there, and ridiculously nice sofas in the waiting area. plenty of light came into the room, and there was a not so pleasant view of the plaza. corporate business people walked across the way every so often, stone cold and unbothered. overall, it wasn’t a very comforting environment, clearly this lady just had to share a space with these people. it had the same energy as visiting plotz after destroying something expensive.

yakko almost wished he was living in that time again. at least then it would feel normal.

“how long is this supposed to take?” wakko quietly asked. he had been shaking his legs the moment he sat on the expensive sofa.

“dunno,” yakko replied, checking the time on his phone. five minutes after four. he had half a mind to text bella and ask if this lady was typically late with her too.

a little exposition to kill time? a little exposition to kill time. annalise must have let it slip to bella that yakko was in the market for a therapist. he wasn’t mad about that, he liked that this friend who claimed to be heartless and cold actually cared. or maybe bella figured it out after the car fiasco. but anyway, she approached him the next day at work to give him her shrink’s business card, and apologized a few times as she explained herself.

_“sorry to bug you. i know this is probably none of my business, and sorry if i’m prying, but if you want a therapist, uh, well, mine is pretty great. i’ve been seeing her for almost six years, sorry if that’s TMI. uh, you should call her if you’re still interested!”_

maybe it was the random act of kindness or her hooded brown eyes filled with sincerity or the fact that this therapist was covered by his health insurance, but yakko made the call. made not one, but three separate appointments for each of them. when he brought up the therapy thing again, wakko and dot agreed to participate as well so he wasn’t alone. 

now, yakko was debating whether or not he should grab the sibs and run for the hills. they weren’t even in the room yet and it was already too real.

“i’m not saying a word once we’re in,” dot stubbornly added.

“you made the decision to come,” yakko reminded her. though he had to admit, he might end up doing the same.

“to be supportive. that doesn’t mean i have to talk to the woman.”

“you also agreed to participate.”

another five minutes went by before a tall blonde woman emerged from the corridor. she was in a beige dress, and her heels clacked on the floor as she walked. she was older, probably in her sixties, and had kind green eyes. she didn’t call any names, she just approached the waiting area.

“hi! the warners, yes?” she said with a smile.

yakko got to his feet to properly greet her. “that’s us.”

“i’m helena carlisle, lovely to meet you. why don’t you three follow me?”

she led them to another waiting area just outside her office. this one was smaller and had less nicer sofas, and the lights were done. it felt a little cozier. helena gestured for them sit in this area, and was in and out of her office in a flash.

“if each of you could fill these out,” she said as she handed each of them a clipboard with several forms on it. “then we can get started.”

it was mostly general stuff on the first page: _name, date of birth, insurance._ the second page was specifically for toons: _check all the traits you were drawn with._ the third page was more interesting.

 _check all the symptoms that you have been experiencing for 2 or more weeks._ the long list of symptoms were sorted by behavioral, emotional, and physical.

there were rare times the warners didn’t discuss something, and this was one of those times. maybe if they were in a timeline where things weren’t completely jacked up and there wasn’t a painful distance between them…

_where’s the option for ‘my old shrink died and i feel weird about it because my last interaction with him was absolutely terrible’?_

it took a few minutes for each of them to fill out the forms. after that, helena finally let them into her office. it was also small, mostly because the beige L-shape couch took most of the space. yeah, this lady was probably trying to make ends meet with this box she was working out of.

“alright, so i have three appointments in a row for you guys,” helena said, “so i assume we’re going one at a time? who would like to go first?”

what was she expecting? the three of them to be on the edge of their seats? _me! me! i wanna talk about the bad things!_ what kind of p-psych was this?

“okay....” she trailed off when none of them volunteered and looked at one of the clipboards. “dot? would you like to go over your symptoms first?”

she shook her head.

yakko and wakko looked at her. she was certainly staying true to her word, sitting with her arms folded and keeping her mouth shut.

“i’ll go first,” wakko volunteered.

he wanted to take it back as soon as he said it. a knot formed in his stomach as he watched helena pull his forms from the bottom of the clipboard stack.

“alright, wakko warner…” the lady said, placing the other forms on the coffee table in front of her. “did you want to do this one-on-one, or with your siblings here?”

he tilted his head. “i can decide that?”

“yes! i just want to make sure you’re as comfortable as possible.”

that was certainly new. scratchy always decided where to put the siblings. 

“this is fine,” wakko said after a moment.

“great!” helena smiled and then she eyed his forms. “let’s see.. you put down that you’re having sleep disturbances? any idea why that is?”

“i just don’t get tired,” wakko replied. “my brain just doesn’t shut off.”

“are there any specific thoughts running through your mind? anything that’s troubling you?”

_sheesh, where do i begin? no, seriously._

his brain was now shut off. there was so much going through it just a minute ago.

after a moment, helena spoke again. “we can come back to that. how about - just to make sure you’re safe - you’re having eating problems?”

both of his siblings looked at him, as if they didn’t know their brother was having those issues. it’s not like he was complaining about it for the last month.

“my stomach hurts all the time,” he said. “and the headaches i get are so bad i don’t want to eat.”

“he’s on medication,” yakko clarified. “his body makes too much insulin, so the meds he’s prescribed are giving him side effects.”

helena nodded as she wrote on her own clipboard. this lady had a clipboard problem. “okay, how often do you feel these symptoms?”

“everyday. i hate it,” wakko said. “i wanted to stop taking it, but yakko said i couldn’t.”

“it sounds bothersome. a headache and stomachache is one thing, but experiencing them every single day is a lot for anyone. does it keep from going to school or doing any activities?”

“i’ve had to leave school early… and i can’t get out of bed sometimes, but…”

“you can’t just stop taking the medicine, we’ve been over this,” yakko told him. “you’re on the path to diabetes, wakko. the best the doctor could offer was cutting back on the dosage.”

even dot gave him an incredulous look. he really wasn’t hearing any of this.

“i know!” wakko suddenly snapped. “i know it’s ridiculous! but... i don’t know! i just don’t like it!” he sat back and folded his arms, frustrated.

that prompted helena to ask more questions. what was wakko like before this diagnosis?

_in the hospital. bowel obstruction tried to do me in._

how did wakko feel about that? has he ever been in the hospital before?

_it was really uncomfortable. they shoved a tube up my nose. i don’t think i’ve been the same since then._

has wakko had any issues like this before?

_not really. just stomachaches here and there. all the health stuff just came all at once. first there’s something stuck in my digestive tract and they find a GI condition i shouldn’t have until i’m at least twenty something. at the follow up appointment i discover i’m on the path to diabetes._

“and then the doctors kept pointing out that i’m _so_ young,” he continued as he rolled his eyes. “right, what’s that gonna do? cure me?”

“it means you’re resilient,” helena told him. “but all of this does seem overwhelming. a myriad of health issues can occur as a delayed reaction to an unveiling.”

“the doctor said that too.” it didn’t help in the slightest. the unveiling wasn’t something he wanted in the first place, but we’re well past that.

“well, you may be feeling overwhelmed and frustrated not only because of the side effects your medication gives you, but also because the unveiling process affects the traits you were given when you were first drawn.”

there was a pause. then, yakko, wakko, and dot all let out a long, “oooh…”

helena tilted her head, bemused. “did your unveiling counselor not mention this to you?”

“we didn’t have one of those,” wakko said, waving it off.

“it’s a long story,” yakko added.

dot nodded in agreement.

it went quiet again as helena looked down and made another note on her clipboard, underlining and circling something. “alright. so wakko. you’re going through all these changes, and feeling overwhelmed by the things that contradict your very being as a toon. are there other things you’re feeling besides overwhelmed?”

“well, they’re all on those forms i filled out, aren’t they?” _please don’t make me say it._

“so… unhappy? lonely? helpless?” she read from his page.

“worried wasn’t on there, but that too,” he added. he chuckled and rubbed his neck, but it wasn’t funny in the slightest. he could feel his brother and sister looking at him with shock. he wished he hadn’t sat between them.

“why do you worry?” helena asked him.

“i keep thinking i’ll get sick,” he admitted as he looked down at his lap. “it happens every time i eat… that i’ll end up in the hospital again. even when i’m not eating, i’m thinking i’ll come down with something. the next time i go to the doctor, i’m worried they’ll tell me i have another disease to deal with. i can’t stop thinking about it. it keeps me awake at night.”

“that’s probably what’s causing your sleep disturbances,” helena confirmed. 

“i keep thinking that the next time i go to the hospital i won’t come out.” it was burning in his throat. he never wanted to say that out loud, but it was just bubbling out of him. “and i feel like i’m losing a friend…”

“how so?”

“i think… i think wakko warner is someone else. he was happy, and eating lots of snacks. he was good at that. i don’t eat like him anymore, so… i’m not good at anything.” he blinked and tears went down his face.

“oh, i’m sure that’s not true.” helena slid the box of tissues across the table for him. “let’s bring the whole family into this, yes? yakko, dot, what do you think wakko’s good at?”

they didn’t hesitate.

“you’re good at making me laugh,” dot said, breaking her silence. she slid her hand into his. “especially when i’m sad. takes real talent to do that.”

“you’re good at keeping your cool,” yakko told him. “for the most destructive warner, you don’t yell or throw things when you're upset.”

“and you’re an amazing listener.”

“and great at violin.”

“you’re a good actor.”

“and brother!”

“and you’re so polite compared to your asshole siblings.”

“dot, language!” yakko looked at the shrink. “sorry about that.”

“no worries,” she replied. “it’s a safe space, you can say anything you want.”

yakko would remember that.

wakko’s shoulders were hunched as he cried quietly. he buried his face in his hands, so dot lied her head on his shoulder and rubbed his arm and yakko hugged him from his side. it was all so jarring. here wakko thought he was crazy, and not in the toon way. he thought others were seeing him the way he saw himself. he didn’t think there was anything left in him that shone the way his old self did.

therapy was never like this with doc-

_don’t finish that thought._

“i’m sorry…” wakko sniffled as he sat up again.

“you have nothing to apologize for,” helena reassured. “the transition from toon to human, along with having health issues that contradict your character is a lot for anyone to take on, let alone a teenager. have you talked about this with anyone else?”

he shook his head. if anything, he tried to avoid talking about it. part of that was because of yakko’s reactions to it, but wakko didn’t want to put his brother on the spot. not yet anyway.

“i know someone,” yakko said. “someone who understands the health parts. he can talk to her.”

_another shrink?_

“okay, good. so that covers eating and sleeping problems. wakko, is it okay if we move forward or do you want to stop?”

he agreed to keep going. as it turns out, most of the other symptoms he checked off linked back to his eating habits. he was unhappy because his relationship with food had changed. he was envious of anyone who could eat without worry. he felt lonely because no one seemed to hear him when he tried to voice these things. he was helpless because all of this was out of his control. he was depressed because he wasn’t sure who he was outside of “the eating stuff guy,” the one thing he knew and was comfortable with. it was all just building up over time.

helena pretty much encouraged wakko to talk to other people about this, like the friend yakko mentioned. wakko might actually do that… he was curious as to who this friend was. helena also advised him to keep a list of the good things yakko and dot said about him so he could remember them.

“and, one last thing before we close,” she said. “we covered a lot this session, so i want you to leave all the bad thoughts and feelings here in this office. okay?”

if wakko could physically remove these gross feelings, he wouldn’t be in this office in the first place. but he nodded and wiped the rest of his tears.

before the warners left, helena pulled yakko aside, wanting to speak with him privately. he sent the sibs back to the main waiting area. for a hot second, yakko thought this mental health professional was going to grill him. how dare he, the primary caretaker, let his little brother get into such a state? how dare he miss all the signs that his little brother was struggling to cope? but instead, she was kind, but firm.

“i know we still have two introductory sessions to get through,” she told him, “but now knowing that you three haven’t had your post unveiling counseling, i’m strongly suggesting you return for regular sessions.”

last week, yakko wouldn’t have even stepped foot in an office like this. but after seeing how badly affected wakko was, and how much it fucking hurt to see, yakko had to consider it. none of them even brought up scratchy’s death, which was supposed to be the primary reason for coming in. clearly, there was a lot to uncover, and this lady was talented at making people vomit out their deepest shit.

“well. we’ll be back tomorrow for dot’s session,” he told her.

yeah, he was coming back, but yakko wanted to put off his own session for a couple more chapters.

when he got back to the sibs, they were coming out of a hug. whatever words were exchanged was unknown to yakko, and after that emotionally exhausting session, he decided not to push it.

“alright, miss dot,” he said as he led them outside the building. “you’re up tomorrow.”

“fat chance,” she scoffed.

“what? you _don’t_ wanna talk about yourself for a whole hour?”

she went silent for a moment as they all walked back towards the car. even after all this time, dot could never turn down such a thing.

“fine. but i’m doing the session alone.”

it was that easy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok Ok ok ok ok ok YALL not one (1) but TWO ppl made ART for this series 😭🖤 the first is from ashdash2417 and it’s a combo of different scenes from the story and it can be found here [ HERE](https://ashdash2417.tumblr.com/post/642341899399823360/oh-boy-this-is-the-first-massive-post-ive-ever) and the other is from xpanicsketchesx and it’s what the warners wear in this fic (bc I forgot to specify in the fic so I made a separate post) and that can be found [HERE](https://xpanicsketchesx.tumblr.com/post/642577457055154176/its-tgfmtif-outfits-d-hilariouslyedgy-said-she) so go check them out and follow these lovely ppl 😭


	16. kinda thought they might care

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everything i wanted - billie eilish

“well, i’m an aries,” dot said with a polite grin. “that explains all the angry symptoms, right?”

helena did not write that down. she usually wrote everything down, but not that. there’s always a skeptic.

“let’s try to figure out other reasons why you’re having these issues, shall we?” she said. “has anything happened recently that’s made you feel angry?”

dot smoothed out her skirt and fixed her oversized cardigan as she mulled it over. it felt like everything was rubbing her the wrong way lately. it was taking a lot out of her. it made her jaw her, her hands numb, and of course - the ear steam.

“being angry makes me angry,” she replied after a moment. “i wish i could just cry like a normal person.”

“anger is a normal feeling. it’s a secondary emotion, so it may just cover up the need to cry. when was the last time you cried, dot?”

_ that’s easy. _

“almost two months ago,” she replied calmly. “it was a sunday night. i didn’t wanna go to school. wait.” she paused. there was a lot of crying done that weekend. “it was a monday. i was in the car with my brothers, and we were singing.”

“so you ended up going to school?”

“no, but we went to pick up wakko.”

“why didn’t you want to go to school?”

dot sat up straighter and crossed one leg over the other. she even painted on a smile like she was in a press interview a million years ago.

“well… my birthday was that weekend.” she pursed her lips and paused, masking the surprise at how quickly the burning feeling in her throat arrived. she continued when it passed. “i invited a bunch of my friends over for a party, and not a single one of them showed up.”

helena raised her eyebrows. “really?”

“mhm. wasn’t ideal.”

“how long did you wait before you realized no one was coming? it must have been awful.”

another pause. there it was, that crying feeling. dot still had the ability to cry, but she didn’t want to. that was the problem… or  _ a  _ problem amongst others.

“it was an hour and a half, and then i destroyed all the party decorations.” she was still smiling. she probably looked like a serial killer. she didn’t take her eyes off helena, who was taking notes.

“you destroyed the decorations?” she repeated. “what was it, balloons and streamers?”

“and all the food too. didn’t really want a reminder of the party that didn’t happen.”

“dot, i’m so sorry this happened to you. truly.”

“oh, it’s okay. it hasn’t really affected me that much. i just don’t like talking to people as much as i used to. and i got in trouble at school, but i stayed in trouble so that way i didn’t have to talk to anyone or… face them.”

helena was really good at not reacting. maybe she was an actress. or p-psych on a movie lot.

dot swallowed the lump in her throat once more.

“and how did you get in trouble?”

“well, i didn’t plan it. this stupid kid, james miller, heard about how my birthday went and decided to make fun of me. teachers told me he was just being a boy.”

“really, they said that?”

“sure did! he uh…” she went quiet again, but not because of a burning feeling in her throat. dot actually let out a soft chuckle. “it was a couple weeks after my birthday, and i thought all the weird looks and humiliation was over, but he made a birthday card from notebook paper and it said ‘happy birthday whore.’ really, of all the things he could have said… but anyways, i told him to shove it. he called me a whore again…” dot was giggling now. “so i took out my mallet and told him to leave me alone. i didn’t even hit him, and i wasn’t going to! besides, the mallet was rubber, it wouldn’t have hurt him. but i got in-school-suspension for three days.”

“did this boy get in trouble for calling you names?”

“no!” dot threw her head back in laughter. she wasn’t sure why this was so funny.

“and then you said you stayed in trouble? how so?”

“i sassed the ISS teacher. gave me an extra day. i just wasn’t in the mood to see anyone, even after three weeks.”

“so you invite a group of friends to your birthday party, none of them arrive, and then this bully comes along to rub salt on the wound, causing you to lash out.”

then dot stopped laughing. “my entire history class thinks i’m a ticking time bomb. and so do the people i used to hang out with. i suppose they’re not wrong, i do have steam coming out of my ears most of the time.”

“because you feel so angry all the time.” helena met her gaze. how could one woman have so much compassion in her wise green eyes? “do you feel angry at home as well? or is it only at school?”

well, this lady didn’t think she was a freak after all that so…

dot simply nodded, still feeling a bit of doubt that this lady wasn’t going to react. she didn’t like talking to yakko particularly, worried she might snap and make things worse. wakko was usually busy with his migraines, so dot was left to avoid her eldest brother as much as she could in that tiny apartment.

“have you talked to any of the people you invited to your party? did you ever find out why no one showed up?”

this wasn’t funny anymore, but dot was still grinning. “no. i don’t know what i’d do. i think i’ll go into a blind rage or something.”

“you think you’ll hurt them?”

“not exactly. i don’t want to cause harm, but i don’t think i’ll be able to control myself. i mean i was two steps away from smacking the school bully with a rubber hammer.” and she stole her brother’s money and screamed at him, but that’s another conversation.

“and you said you haven’t cried in two months…” helena quickly looked over her notes. “dot, your avoidance is making you lash out. remember what i said about anger being a secondary emotion? it’s just the tip of the iceberg to a whole load of other feelings. you need to really look inside yourself and try to figure out what you’re masking with the anger.”

this was very much not a laughing matter anymore. dot was still smiling. “you know, when i got into showbiz, i was told that not everyone was going to like me. and that was fine - i was drawn with high self esteem and the highest confidence. i wasn’t ‘the cute one’ simply because i’m a girl. critics were harsh on my character back then. even people now think one way of me. but it didn’t matter. the only person that needs to love me is me. it’s a good quality to have.”

“it is.”

the smile faded. “but they were supposed to be my friends. i thought they liked me. and i started to wonder… if people who were only pretending to like me actually hate me… why should i like me?”

“oh, dot…”

“no, but that’s the thing. i’ve never had a thought or feeling like that, ever! i’m dot warner, i don’t question my self worth! i don’t wonder why someone doesn’t like me or why someone has it out for me! i don’t get hung up on why twelve people collectively decided to abandon me  _ on my birthday!  _ but here i am!” dot gasped, realizing her hands were numb and her face was wet.

frankly, she hadn’t noticed how much was being kept inside. not even halfway through the session and she was cracked wide open. she wasn’t sitting all poised and pretty anymore: she was hunched over, grabbing the edge of the sofa she was sitting on, wondering how the hell she got like this.

“dot,” helena said, calm as ever. “can you take a deep breath for me?”

they breathed together, although dot’s breath was shaky. she was still teary eyed, but felt a little better after. it cleared her mind a little bit, and she didn’t feel like ripping the couch cushion apart anymore.

“i just hate this feeling…” she said softly. “that everyone i’ve ever known probably hates me. i have to be careful with what i do.” who was this girl and what had she done with dot warner?

“so you’re feeling hurt? anxious? sad?”

dot nodded as more tears flooded her system. it felt like she was underwater.

“say the words,” helena advised. “you are hurt…”

“i’m hurt,” she choked out with a sob. “i’m anxious. and i’m sad… i’m so sad…” she buried her face in her hands, now almost wishing her brothers were there to give her a hug.

“you know, despite how you were drawn,” helena said after a moment, “losing all your friends at once is quite the traumatic experience.”

“i don’t think i’m traumatized, though.” she grabbed a tissue from the box on the table to dab at her tears. “i just don’t think people like me. and i don’t like being around them anymore. and i just think about how long it’ll take for my new friends to leave me. other than that-”

“dot, that’s trauma.”

she wasn’t sure why, but she giggled again. it was a very odd thing to do while crying.

“and along with that, this anxiety that people don’t like you feels very out of the ordinary because your unveiling exposes you to everything else outside of your character, like low self esteem and a fear of rejection.”

it always goes back to the unveiling. that’s what made her this way. that’s what made her brothers this way.

more tears welled up in her eyes as that thought passed. it brought up something else, and she wasn’t in the mood for a carefully thought out transition. time for a hard right turn.

“i never used to fight with my brothers,” she said, eyes fixed on the coffee table. “well, i still haven’t actually fought with wakko. yakko, on the other hand…”

if she had recounted the experience anytime before today, she may have really fallen apart. but it was easier to tell the tale of hair dye and ear steam. it still stung a little, though. dot wondered if yakko knew how true his words were. sure, dot was already friends with jasmine at that point, but it’s not like they were blowing up each other’s phones. no one spoke to her anymore, and that already hurt. yakko pointing it out only increased the pain tenfold.

“has he tried to apologize for what he said?” helena asked.

“yeah. but i was still mad at him. also…” dot sighed. “i’m not really expecting an apology. he wasn’t wrong-“

“it’s still a really hurtful thing to say, especially with what you were going through. and coming from your brother, too…”

“but i haven’t apologized to him for stealing his debit card. the stupid dye didn’t even last long.” dot touched the ends of her bob, which was now a sickly yellowish grey color.

“well… yakko is sitting right outside the door. would you like to bring him in so you can mend things?”

dot thought about it, and quickly nodded. it might be better for a third party to be present. otherwise, she and yakko might just rip each other’s heads off.

helena seemed pleased with that. she offered a warm smile as she got up to get the eldest warner from the waiting area.

for a moment, dot attempted to fix her posture and sit up like she did before. but as soon as she had crossed her legs and fixed her skirt, she undid it and simply just wrapped her cardigan tighter around herself. she was too tired to try to look like she had her shit together.

yakko seemed a little confused as to why he was summoned, but his expression changed as he laid eyes on his teary eyed sister. he sat next to her, watching her for a moment before turning to the shrink.

“alright, so dot was telling me about the argument you two had a few weeks ago,” she said once she was back in her chair. “some hurtful things were exchanged?”

both sibs were silent, avoiding eye contact. yakko had averted his eyes to the coffee table, while dot looked off to the side. good thing helena was a professional. 

“dot, what were you telling me about apologizing?”

“that yakko shouldn’t have to be sorry, because i wasn’t for taking his card.” she still wasn’t looking at anyone.

“do you think you deserved what he said to you?”

she didn’t say anything, so yakko did.

“no. no, dot, you didn’t. i…” he paused. “you didn’t deserve it. and i shouldn’t have said what i said.”

dot listened, turning her head, but still not looking at him. she knew yakko wasn’t to blame for all of the things she had already shared today.

“why did you say it then?”

yakko hesitated. “ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ…”

“were you upset or angry?” helena asked. “it sounded like a very heated conversation.”

angry didn’t really cover it. yakko would have had steam coming from his own ears if dot hadn’t brought the figurative hammer to his chest.

“i was upset, yeah… dot said something i didn’t like, and i snapped."

dot felt her insides drop. honestly, what  _ didn’t  _ she say that didn’t piss him off? she was seeing red the whole time, she didn’t have full control of the words coming out of her mouth. 

“and what did she say?”

“there is no ‘we.’ as in me, dot, and wakko. we aren’t what we used to be.” yakko scratched the back of his head, uncomfortable. he yakked less when it came to sensitive topics, dot noticed.

“we used to be so close,” she explained, now facing helena. “it’s always been just the three of us against the world.”

“and what changed?”

“yakko.”

“don’t pull your punches,” he mumbled.

“well, i know it’s harsh, but i don’t know how else to put it,” she told him. “and i was mad, anyway.”

“so you don’t think it’s me versus you and wakko?”

she hesitated.

yakko looked at her in disbelief. even though it had been staring him right in the face for the better part of a couple of months, the reality was still hitting like a bus.

“okay, let’s backtrack a little bit,” helena said after some scribbling, “because this sounds like something we can explore during a family session, if you guys are up for it, of course.”

both sibs looked down at their laps, disgruntled. what was the point of this conversation again?

“so you both said things that hurt the other, you’ve explained your perspectives-”

“are you gonna make us hug and make up?” yakko asked.

“i’m not going to make you do anything. it’s up to you if you’re ready to forgive each other.”

forgive her for what? telling the truth?

dot slowly turned her head towards her brother, uncertain. no, she wasn’t planning on staying mad at him forever, but she hadn’t planned on forgiving him so quickly either. but that was before death came knocking on the door on a tuesday morning before school. once again, things had changed.

that in mind, she sighed. “i’m tired of being so angry.” that was all she could come out with before tears welled up in her eyes.

“me too, sib,” yakko replied as he scooted closer to her, reaching for her hand. “hey, you know i’m always trying to do right by you and wakko. i’m still figuring it out how to be a legal guardian and your fun big brother at the same time. and i’m sorry for what i said to you. it was way outta line, especially with what you were going through.”

she squeezed his hand and nodded. “i’m sorry i stole your debit card. and i’m sorry i’ll probably do it again in the future.”

“oh-kay, like hell you will.”

they didn’t hug. maybe later they would. for now, yakko was sent back out to the waiting area so dot’s session could wrap up.

“so how did that feel?” helena asked her. “you two made quite a bit of progress in such a short amount of time, it’s remarkable.”

“he’s my brother,” dot replied with a shrug. “with all the other stuff that’s happened, i just want my family to be okay. they could die tomorrow, you know.”

the shrink tilted her head. “not that i disagree, but why do you say that?”

“mm, we’ll save it for another session.”

“okay, that’s fine. and just so you know, it’s perfectly normal to feel lingering anger or resentment. it’ll pass, and it’ll pass quicker now that you’ve had some closure.”

dot hoped that was true. she meant it when she said she was tired.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uh. this is the last chapter i wrote before sweet sweet depression made a comeback. and i'm struggling a bit writing the next one (i'm not forcing anything and i'm pacing myself) so if it takes a while for a new update, please bear with me. i'm trying. in the meantime follow [my blog](www.hilariouslyedgy.tumblr.com) for little tidbits abt this fic and follow [the playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7hvsGDHf3Y8XE5YMeClSfT?si=84lEwde6RBObWa7YsiJA_g) bc i'll update it when i'm about to post a new chapter. as always thank you for reading and commenting.


	17. i can’t see in the stormy weather

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> head above water - avril lavigne
> 
> (follow the [ playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7hvsGDHf3Y8XE5YMeClSfT?si=Q_JxgMbUSgO1AEYNHtpNgg))

for someone who wears black all the time, it was a odd to see annalise pull up in the school roundabout in a beige, beat up car. it wasn’t odd, however, to hear heavy metal booming from inside the vehicle. she was nice enough to lower the volume when wakko and dot climbed inside. she actually changed the music altogether.

“so, kidlings,” she said as she drove out of the parking lot. “how was school?”

“you don’t care,” wakko replied, waving it off.

“well, fuck.”

“he’s just mad that we’re not going to yakko’s therapy session,” dot said, making herself comfortable in the passenger seat.

“i’m sure he has his reasons for going alone,” annalise told them. “besides, now you guys get a free trip to… where do you guys wanna eat?”

neither sib was going to deny free food. they picked an italian chain. breadsticks were essential.

“will your, uh, man-friend be joining us?” dot asked with a grin.

“who, shawn? nah, he’s working,” annalise replied.

“oh.”

wakko chuckled to himself, knowing his sister had eyes for the supervisor of the electronic section at target. it would have been interesting to see what would happen if he just let that out into the universe. he wasn’t feeling too bored or destructive today, though, so he just bopped his head along to the funky pop tune that was playing.

dot was having a ball with it, singing passionately, “and i swear! i’m never gonna lose me again!”

she was the epitome of “fake it til you make it.” she was pretty good at masking her emotions, unless she was in true turmoil. anyone who didn’t know her too well would think she was back to her old self.

wakko could say the same for himself. after his own therapy session, he felt the waterworks come and go, but he wasn’t about to let anyone see it. he and his siblings were on their way to fixing what was broken, why should he be crying about it? he thought only one session wouldn’t do much. hell, several years’ worth of sessions in the nineties hardly did anything! but one hour with helena carlisle seemed to uncover several things within this warner. he could only wonder how his eldest brother was taking it.

yeah, wakko wished you could skip ahead to a yakko-in-therapy scene, but apparently that’s in the next chapter.

it had only been two days, and wakko was thinking of what to share next time he saw helena. _if_ he got to see helena. several things had popped up in his head that might be important to talk about, the biggest being why he was so emotional all of a sudden. the second biggest thing came up when he was sat in a booth at the restaurant.

he hadn’t taken his medicine yet. he usually took the dose a few bites into his meal and then it was a gamble on which side effects would come out to play. sketti and meatballs was typically his go to meal, but pasta wasn’t agreeing with him these days. sketti and meatballs was so good, but it wasn’t worth leaning over the toilet for… and that hurt more than it should have.

there were plenty of options on the menu, but wakko was still worried. he carefully studied each item, wondering which one would make him the least ill. maybe he shouldn’t have come… he could have made a sandwich at home.

“so,” annalise began, “can i ask how therapy went?”

“no,” replied dot, who was still perusing the menu.

“noted. wakko?” 

he tore his eyes way from the thick, glossy pages. “uh... i cried.”

“yeah, that happens. i cry with my therapist sometimes.”

“you cry?”

“can you believe?”

just then, a waiter approached the table, ready to serve. wakko still hadn’t decided, so when it came to his time to order, he pointed to a picture of a pasta bowl with vegetables on it. he didn’t even read the description. it had veggies, so it couldn’t make him sick, right?

he took a breath, trying to push away the sudden bout of nerves that threatened to consume him. he took quick glances at the girls sat across from him. dot was on her phone as soon as the waiter was gone. annalise made eye contact with wakko.

“how you doing with the health stuff?” she asked him.

wakko shrugged. “okay. my head hasn’t hurt since yesterday morning, so…”

“any day you don’t feel sick is a good day, right?”

that made him perk up a bit. “yeah... yeah, exactly.”

the waiter returned with breadsticks, and there was a pause as each of them grabbed one to munch on. these things were like crack. crack infused bread. genius. a couple of years ago, wakko could swallow the entire basket whole. he tried not to think about it, but it kept rushing forward in his head.

“you know,” annalise said after taking a bite from her crackbread, “i’ve got some health problems too… pretty consistently actually.”

that even got dot’s attention as she and wakko looked at her in surprise. this was the friend yakko was on about in therapy? annalise, the unbreakable, borderline scary woman?

“you do?” wakko asked, eyes wide.

annalise nodded. “my stomach was hurting for the better part of two years before i got diagnosed with IBS. before that, it felt like there wasn’t anything that didn’t put me in pain. i was trying to eat better and healthier, but…”

“nothing was working?” wakko finished for her.

“what’s IBS?” dot asked.

annalise explained it, and it wasn’t pretty.

“oh, and i got an ulcer last year,” she added, “which only made my stomach hurt worse. i had to cut out specific foods that upset it more. it sounds like nothing when i say it, but it really sucked at the time.”

getting rid of favorite foods. constant upset stomach. someone gets it.

wakko was silent for too long, because annalise spoke up again.

“what i’m saying is, i know how you feel. getting a bunch of health problems at once fucking sucks. and it seems like no one understands because it’s not something life threatening.”

oh, she really gets it.

“wow,” dot said, incredulous. “you should try telling that to yakko. maybe then he’ll take it seriously.”

“believe me, i tried,” annalise told her. “maybe your therapist will do a better job.”

again, there was hope that the scene would skip to yakko, but they were all still in the restaurant. well, at least wakko had another question.

“are there foods you’re scared to eat because they might make you sick?”

she didn’t answer right away. she was pulling her breadstick apart in her hand as she thought about it.

“yeah. my ulcer has been healed for months now, but i still have IBS. so i’m pretty weary of some things.”

“like what? i don’t like eating pizza anymore. or mac and cheese.” two delicious foods that betrayed him. it was weird to be so bummed out by something so mundane.

“me too!” annalise said. “it’s all the salt and oils. and uh… my mom hates this, but i can’t have pozole anymore.”

“what’s that?”

“it’s a mexican stew. whenever there’s a holiday or event, that’s the meal we go for. it’s spicy, and made with pork. it’s a lot for a stomach like mine, and it was my favorite thing to eat since i was a kid. but i can’t eat it anymore, but my mom still tries to make me.” she paused. “it’s not like i asked to be this way, y’know?”

“but doesn’t she know you’re sick?”

“yeah. it’s ridiculously hard to convince your elders to break or modify traditions in a hispanic household. so i try not to spend too much time at family things... don’t know what i’m gonna do for christmas.” she shrugged with a chuckle, but nothing about that seemed funny.

now wakko was glad yakko didn’t do anything like that. imagine being hounded for something you couldn’t control. it was bad enough just feeling ill. imagine it getting so bad it severs ties. wakko couldn’t see himself having a christmas without his older brother. yakko and dot are all he has. they’re family.

or... are they?

he didn’t bring it up at the restaurant. he and annalise uncovered quite a bit, and it was comforting to know that someone understood. sucks that she still deals with those problems, but at least she knew where wakko was coming from. besides, he wasn’t sure how she would tackle the next string of thoughts since she wasn’t a toon.

yakko, wakko, and dot were drawn with specific individual characteristics. together, they were drawn as siblings. the unveiling slowly but surely diminished their defining qualities over the last few years. wakko was no longer packing away the snacks, dot’s confidence was shot, and yakko… well we’ll find out what he uncovered in due time. so did the unveiling ruin their relationship as a family too? was that why things got so wonky and messed up?

wakko wanted it out of his head as soon as it showed up, but it embedded itself further into his brain the more sense it made. and it really freaked him out that it made so much sense.

he didn’t bring it up until after annalise had dropped him and dot off at the apartment. maybe dot would understand. she usually did.

not only did she understand, she was having the exact same spiral, and had been since the first therapy session.

“we’ve never fought,” she said as she paced the living room. “yakko’s never been so… un-yakko in his entire life. i don’t even know who he is anymore. i don’t know who _i_ am anymore! of course the unveiling did this!”

wakko was lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling. “so... was it only meant to destroy relationships and families? all of our traits fit together and made us work, but when they’re taken away… then what?”

dot stopped in her tracks, thought about it, and then proceeded to lay down on the living room floor. she pressed her hands to her temples, visibly frustrated. “how long before we lose each other completely, then?”

“i’d rather not think about that.”

dot groaned. “i can’t believe we ever went through with the unveiling.”

“hey, i never wanted it. you and yakko were jumping at the chance.”

“we didn’t have a choice!” she moved her arms above her head. “everyone was telling us to do it because we had to move!”

“since when do we listen to what everyone says? why did we pick that one time to trust some business suits?”

“wakko!” dot sighed in frustration, clearly not wanting to think up reasons why they were so stupid.

he rubbed his eyes, at a loss. everything was so screwed up for no good reason. “i told you guys i didn’t want to do it… we could have hidden out on the lot somewhere. the other toons actually liked us, someone would have taken us in.”

“the studio was going to destroy the tower!” dot sat up, raising her voice. “what would we have gone back to?”

“we didn’t know they were going to do that!” he shot back, sitting up as well. “if we were still on the lot when they destroyed our home, we could have done something about it! we probably could have found out sooner and maybe we wouldn’t be like this now!”

the two of them exchanged angry looks, but wakko quickly changed to shock. he watched dot, and saw a small grey cloud form over her head. she had the same look on her face, and then wakko felt drops on top of his head.

“we get it! we’re sad!” dot yelled, looking up at her own personal storm as it poured on her face. she lied back down, shielding her face with her hands.

wakko simply remained on the couch, disgruntled. he closed his eyes as raindrops streamed down his face. he could have cried, but the cloud was already doing it for him. his ears drooped as he took off his hat, tossing it onto the coffee table in defeat. it’s not like they could go back.

as if on cue, the lock on the door began to jiggle. both sibs looked at the front door, like deer caught in headlights. neither moved from their places as yakko entered the apartment.

his shoulders were hunched. he was holding a tray of drinks. he also had a cloud floating above his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember when i said i was ✨spicy sad✨ WELL I still am but I’m functional! i really thought this next update was gonna take longer bc of how down I was but HAHAHAHA. idk what im laughing at. anyways the song for this chapter came from the playlist I made for annalise a million years ago n I thought it would fit here since she’s sharing part of her story🖤 ANYWAYS PT2 sorry this isn’t yakko in therapy i was STRUGGLINQ™️ to figure out how I’d tackle that AND I accidentally uncovered more ❤️Pain and Suffering❤️ with this chapter🥰 thanks for reading! love you!🤭😘💋


	18. thread by thread i come apart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> neptune - sleeping at last  
> (follow the [playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7hvsGDHf3Y8XE5YMeClSfT?si=9pGrgIX4QduNjvThVCKu0Q))

yakko had never been so silent for so long in his life. the only sound that came out of him was a sigh he let out every so often. he wasn’t sighing out of reluctance or annoyance; he just got lost in his thoughts and forgot to breathe sometimes. other than that, he mostly just stared out the window behind the shrink. it was the middle of may and rain decided to pay a visit. the small pitter patters of drops hitting the glass were the only other sound to accompany his breathing, and it was strange.

usually helena did the leading and the talking. she asked wakko about the symptoms he was experiencing, and probably did the same with dot. why was it quiet now?

“i’ll ask again,” helena said, “is there  _ anything  _ specific you’d like to talk about?”

when did she ask a first time? was yakko even here?

“i hear that just the act of showing up to therapy is beneficial,” he replied. really? that’s the first thing he came up with?

helena gave him a knowing smile. “that is a quote from grey’s anatomy. yakko-”

“i’ve been watching that show a lot lately,” he said, and he couldn’t exactly stop. “my sister got into it, and well, we only have one TV, and it’s hard to get her to watch anything else. man, everyone on that show is on something else! every two seconds someone is either coughing up blood or getting- anyways. i’m really liking the pandemic arc they’re doing now. imagine living in something like that? being unable to see friends or family? i think i’d go crazy!”

_ you’re way past that, buddy. _

“are you nervous?” helena asked him in return.

“no, i’m yakko.”

she chuckled. “it’s okay to be nervous for things like this. usually it’s better to have someone with you, like when you were there for your brother. can i ask - why did you leave your siblings at home?”

“they’re in school. no need to pull them out when they already had their own sessions, right?”

“got it. okay, so shall we go over your symptoms now?”

again, daunting. yakko began shaking his leg and kept his eyes on the window.

“you put down that you’re feeling a loss of control…” helena read from his forms. “would you like to talk about that?”

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ not really.” he took a breath. “you know i’ve never been to anaheim? always wanted to take the sibs and go to disney, but we were never allowed to as property of warner bros. our name is on all the buildings and movies, you’d think they’d loosen the chains a bit.”

“the chains?”

“ah - movie studios. they’re very picky about where they want the toons. they actually kept us in the water tower. they figured we could be contained that way, but when you’re a toon, you can make everything from nothing! it was their tower but we were living in it. although, i wish we could have made a functional rollercoaster after they took that set piece away. never really perfected that skill.”

he hadn’t noticed that helena was writing until he heard the click of her pen. 

“so the studio put you in the water tower. did you have any say in that?” she looked at him, crossing one leg over the other.

“like i said, warner bros are picky with their toons and where they go.”

“okay, so you  _ didn’t _ have a choice. you took back control by creating a home from it, a safe place for you and your siblings.”

yakko opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. how did she do that?

“are there any parts in your life now where you’re struggling with control?”

“you know what is a struggle? pockets!” he shifted in his seat, unsure why. he was comfortable a minute ago. “can’t fit a mallet in people clothes, i’m lucky i can fit my wallet and keys! my sister doesn’t even bother trying to find anything with pockets - i mean, she still has her hammerspace - but she still carries this tiny white backpack ‘for the look.’”

helena clicked her pen again. what was she getting out of this? yakko dodged her questions, and she still took notes. maybe he should take notes on her note-taking.

_ this is why you’re in therapy, my guy. _

“anything else you’d like to add?” she asked him. she didn’t sound impatient or annoyed. she seemed interested in what he had to say.

she was so interested that she was taking notes. and that meant she was figuring him out.

yakko shook his head.

“okay, so even though you didn’t want to talk about your loss of control, you did,” helena explained. “you mentioned the studio, where you had less than ideal living conditions until you fixed it.”

oh.

“you brought up your sister twice, and last i saw you two were attempting to mend things.”

yakko lightly tugged at his collar, trying not to feel like he was under a microscope.

“finally, you brought up the usage of pockets, and you checked off recently losing your hammerspace on your forms. so which of those things would you like to tackle first?”

yakko pursed his lips. “you know, helena, you should take ‘practice’ off your window. you seem like you know what you’re doing.”

she grinned and let out a small laugh. “you’re funny. no wonder your show was successful. i will ask again, though: studio, sister, or hammerspace?”

that daunting feeling came back. maybe yakko was nervous. and when he was nervous or stressed, yakko did what he was drawn to do… whether he liked it or not.

“i’ll hit you with a fun fact,” he said after a moment, “did you know the writers of the show just took our actual experiences on the lot and made them funnier? it was cool for a while, it was like a very dramatized reality show - so, a reality show. besides, it gave me and the sibs an excuse to give ‘em hell more often.”

“so the premise of being locked in a tower for years was real?”

“oh, no. not for years.”

“but you were locked in the tower and always managed to break out?”

“what we created in property damage was made up for in decent ratings. they hated us for it, but we were bringing in the dough, so what could they do besides attempt to shove us away and make us see a p-psych who only tried to change and control us- ohh…” he placed his hand over his mouth, surprised. sometimes he thinks he has a handle on the yakking.

“oh?” helena repeated. “oh, what?”

“i... don’t know exactly.” yakko felt like something within himself was unlocked and out in the open. he felt odd. he couldn’t quite figure it out.

but this lady… a true professional.

“well, you have been attempting to avoid my questions by talking about anything else. but you end up bringing up something you checked off on your forms. i don’t think you realize how much you’re avoiding because you didn’t check that one off. avoiding things seems to be how you maintain control.”

avoidant... that was a new one. but it brought a few examples to mind: hiding in the bathroom, wine night with annalise, setting therapy at a time when the sibs were at school… or close to it. annalise should have picked them up by now…

“so i don’t like talking about real stuff,” he concluded. “not if i can help it.”

helena nodded and then put her pen down. “yakko, i should remind you: you chose to seek therapy. you made that decision. i understand it may be difficult to talk about some things, but we can work up to it. that’s why i was letting you decide what to talk about.”

he had been looking at the coffee table for a while now, but yakko listened. it was true, no one forced him to show up here. and he showed up here because he needed help. but he didn’t want this lady to try and change him, but he also desperately wanted someone to tell him what to do because nothing seemed real anymore.

(he also desperately wanted the scene to change to the sibs and annalise, but  _ no  _ it just  _ had  _ to be two separate chapters.)

it was all sitting there at the base of his throat. he clenched and unclenched his hands as he tried to swallow the embarrassment of getting real. it’s not like helena was going to judge him… she barely batted an eye at his ramblings, whereas others would yell at him for straying off topic. he saw what she did with the sibs. 

“everything feels out of control,” he finally said, still averting his eyes. his voice was strained, like he forced the words out. “wouldn’t know where to start.”

“well, let’s see. in what parts of your life do you not have any control? work? friends? family? do you go to school?”

“no, i finished that a couple years ago.”

“college?” 

“definitely not. i can barely make ends meet as it is, and that’s on top of two jobs.”

so he got into his jobs. target during the week, lyft on weekend nights. he didn’t hate his jobs, by any means. his retail job was flexible and his bosses understood he had two little ones to look after. he was his own boss with the driving job, and driving around LA on the weekend meant extra tips which meant he wouldn’t struggle as hard to pay the bills. sometimes, both jobs doubled as his social interaction fix. he even met his friends through target.

then, yakko talked about his friends. the ones from starbucks, he didn’t see anymore. he never thought about it until helena asked, but it did sting a little to know that he only had those friends because he saw them a few times a week. as for bella and annalise… he was still getting to know the former, but she was a good egg. the latter… she’s the older sister he didn’t know he wanted.

finally, he got around to family. himself, his brother, and his sister.

“it’s always been the three of us, and i wouldn’t want it any other way.”

“seems like you had to really stick together,” helena said.

“we were drawn that way. i don’t think that’s changed all that much over the years. or... i didn’t think we had changed.” dot’s words from yesterday circled his mind, and a burn ignited in his throat.

“do you feel things are in control with your family?”

yakko let out a chuckle. “absolutely not!”

“how so?”

again, he didn’t know where to start. he gave helena a quick recap: wakko in the hospital. dot’s birthday. the sneaking out. dot stealing yakko’s card. the police bringing both sibs home at two in the morning.

“okay, that’s a lot to deal with,” she said, brushing her blonde hair out of her face before taking notes. “we’ll cover everything over time, but that last part - how did you feel when you realized they were gone?”

why did this happen? yakko wanted to express the answer to the woman’s question, but it was caught in his throat. it was unfathomable.

“i don’t just tell them what to do for kicks, y’know,” he said. “and i’m certainly not confining them to one place all the time. they have the freedom to go see their friends, as long as they tell me when they’ll be back.”

“of course,” helena agreed. “there are rules in place for everyone’s safety. you have their best interests at heart.”

“right! and they knew this! now…? i don’t even know where we are… what page we’re on. i don’t remember things feeling so scattered.”

“scattered?” she wrote that down.

yakko nodded. “a friend of mine described me that way when… i don’t know, it just doesn’t seem that far off.”

“and if i remember correctly, yesterday dot said it’s you versus them. do you think that’s true?”

“see that-” he cut himself off as the burn intensified slightly. “ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ, pass.”

thankfully, helena understood. “okay. we’re almost out of time anyway. i did notice on your forms you checked off having anxiety, panic, chest pain, and palpitations. i’d definitely like to touch on that next time, okay?”

yakko sighed and ducked his head down between his shoulders, hunching over as he rested his elbows on his knees. “no, i’d rather we didn’t.”

“yakko-”

“i know.” he looked up and met her gaze for the first time since stepping foot in her office today. “i know i won’t get anywhere if i don’t talk. given how much i do that, you’d think therapy would be a breeze. but the truth is… this kinda stuff was never…”

“easy?”

“enjoyable. i figured it’s not supposed to be, but…”

“it’s work,” helena told him. “that’s the truth. you want to solve your problems, you need to work at it. but i’m here to help you through that and give you the tools you need to cope.”

at least she was honest. nothing about this was going to be easy.

“well, it certainly didn’t feel like the last guy was trying to help us.” how that came out of his mouth so easily, yakko had no idea.

“really? what would he do?”

sheesh, was everything going to make him cry? yakko cleared his throat. “he just told us what to do. how to act, how to talk. he tried to medicate us, but i don’t think it was for our benefit. it wasn’t like we could change anyway. we were full toon at the time.”

“you had a bad time with your last therapist,” helena said as she wrote it down. then she looked at yakko. “well, like i said, i’m here to help you. i can’t tell you what to do, it’s up to you whether or not you want to take my advice. as for medication, i can’t prescribe anything. this is primarily talk therapy and cognitive behavioural therapy. if those don’t work for you down the line, then i can direct you to a psychiatrist, but again, it’s up to you.”

yakko didn’t say anything as he processed that. “so what i’m getting is that i have more say in this than i originally thought?”

“you sure do. who was your old therapist, by the way?”

“doesn’t matter, he’s dead.”

that just had to be the thing to crack him. yakko felt the air leave his lungs and his insides turn to lead. he talked more about scratchy than he planned to. the burning feeling went down to his chest, and the ache made it into his bones.

it must have shown on his face, because helena’s voice turned gentle.

“were you close to him?”

yakko swallowed and cleared his throat. “it doesn’t matter. we’re done here, right?”

helena tried to get him to stay to schedule another session, but he made up an excuse that he had to pick up the sibs and promised to call her. he walked out of the office, the building, and out to the parking garage. he couldn’t quite remember doing so. he came to when he was crying in the driver’s seat.

but that was all he did. he didn’t spiral, he didn’t hyperventilate. he was able to drive. he just couldn’t stop crying. he put on dot’s playlist to try to find something to keep him distracted, but everything was too sad.  _ the archer, up down, ghosts, hoax.  _ not to mention it was still raining. some poetic asshole would say the sky was crying with him.

nothing about this was poetic. nothing about this was beautiful. it was like every seam of his being was popping open and tearing him apart. he clutched his chest when he was at a stoplight, feeling like his heart was going to fall out.

and yet, he still managed to go through a starbucks drive thru in tears and the baristas were none the wiser. how? he couldn’t tell you.

he was still crying by the time he got home. he parked the car and killed the ignition, remaining in his seat. he tried to calm down, level his shaky breath. he couldn’t enter the apartment looking like a mess, and besides, he’s had enough meltdowns for a lifetime. 

just when he felt a little more put together, yakko felt more wetness on his face, but it didn’t come from his eyes.

he looked up. “shit…”

there was no hiding it now. yakko dragged his feet as he left the car and walked up the steps to his front door, carrying the tray of drinks with him.

even if there weren’t two additional clouds in the living room, the atmosphere was very much demanding to be acknowledged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really hope this came out well. as always thanks for reading!🖤


	19. looking for a better place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next few chapters will be based off:
> 
> lovely -billie eilish, khalid  
> (follow the [playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7hvsGDHf3Y8XE5YMeClSfT?si=E18pXs2mTyGl0_QlAbhzoA))

wakko sucked down his chocolate chip frappuccino, dot stirred her pink drink, and yakko sipped his iced coffee. they sat together on the couch, but none of them had said a word yet. although, they did silently agree that a sweet drink was somewhat healing.

 _see,_ dot thought, _yakko knew exactly what we wanted. maybe he’s still there. maybe there’s still hope._

there were still clouds above their heads. three stormy elephants in the room. good thing the raindrops only hit their heads and disappeared.

therapy must have done a number on yakko, judging by his own elephant. it was surprising he hadn’t gone straight for the bathroom. clearly, there was something, several somethings to talk about, but no one said anything.

yakko had to admit, he felt slightly normal again after getting something in his system. but he still had to make dinner… it felt so mundane and pointless to be thinking of such small everyday things. the sibs had to eat, though.

“so what’s for dinner?” he asked, finally breaking the silence.

“we already ate,” dot replied, staring at the TV. it was turned off. “annalise took us to get italian.”

one less thing to do. yakko quietly swirled his drink in hand.

“you take your meds, wakko?”

“yup. my head hurts.”

three massive elephants. yakko shifted in his seat.

“so maybe i-”

“are you-”

yakko and dot shared a look. things suddenly felt very heightened, almost eerie. it was happening now.

“ladies first,” yakko told her, already discarding his thoughts about missing scratchy.

“do you still see yourself as our brother?” the time for silence and hesitation was clearly over.

“ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ what?”

“did i stutter?”

“alright, take it down a notch. where is this coming from?”

wakko decided to get in on this too. “the unveiling. it changed all of us, so it probably means we’re not siblings anymore.”

it was like getting clubbed over the head with a rusty pipe. or that gif of that news reporter getting taken out by a stop sign. yakko was just thrown for a loop in less than ten seconds. it just couldn’t process in his head, especially after the stressful hour he’s had. “ᵘᵘᵘᵘʰʰʰʰʰ _no.”_

he was staring straight ahead, but he could feel wakko and dot staring at him. on any other day when his brain wasn’t so foggy and there wasn’t rain on his head, yakko would have more to say. since he wasn’t saying much, dot was saying everything.

“don’t you realize how much we’ve all changed? how much _you’ve_ changed? i know it’s inevitable but this doesn’t feel right. i mean, look at all this freaking rain!”

“well, i can’t pull an anvil from out of nowhere, and talk my way out of things in this world,” he replied, trying to stay patient. “i’ve had to adjust. so have you guys. we’re never going to be who we were on the movie lot.”

dot was now standing, at a loss for words. she wasn’t even mad, just in awe at what her brother was saying. 

“you wouldn’t think that if we hadn’t gone through with the procedure,” wakko said. “did helena tell you to say that?”

“didn’t get that far,” yakko said shortly.

that sent dot from zero to a hundred.

“right. what do you have to talk about other than the unveiling and the time we were homeless?” she spat. “you're not the one with food anxiety! you’re not the one who has social anxiety! you don’t care that we’re losing each other! you don’t even care that doctor scratchansniff died!”

yakko suddenly met her gaze. he sat up, placing his already forgotten drink on the table. “you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“oh yeah?” dot scoffed. “you didn’t even want to go to his funeral! and everyday when you get home you ignore us and sit in the bathroom! and when you’re not ignoring us, you’re just telling us that things could be worse! who are you and what have you done with my brother?” her voice was firm and unwavering, but her eyes welled up with every word she spoke.

“i’m still me,” yakko said after an unnerving moment of silence. “sure i’m not as zany as before, but none of us are… look in the mirror, dot. you dyed your hair _blue._ among other things. wakko, you-”

“i hate it,” he said. he had been sitting between his brother and sister, playing with the straw on his empty cup. “i hate what we’ve become.”

“you don’t mean that-”

“i didn’t want to get unveiled! i didn’t want to leave the lot!” he was starting to cry too, and he refused to look at either sibling.

“none of us did, wakko! you think it was easy coming to that decision?” yakko said to him. “you think i wanted to let go of the tower? do you really think i wanted to sit in a chair and throw up ink for six hours?”

that made wakko and dot cringe simultaneously. no one liked that memory.

to be fair, yakko never expressed any of this to the sibs. why would he? what good would it do? yes, he was mildly suspicious of the execs’ ulterior motives of the situation… but he knew it was probably better to get off the lot altogether than to see what the higher ups would do if they stayed. besides, once the warners were bouncing between foster homes and the streets, surviving was the only thing on their minds. that, and staying together.

why would he suddenly bring it up five years later?

~

that was exactly the point of therapy. yakko called helena, but instead of scheduling three separate sessions, he booked a family one. he really wasn’t sure what else there was to do. it seemed like a conversation couldn’t be had between the warners without yelling or crying or passive aggression. the weekend consisted of that, or some very loud silence. it was definitely going to be a long week.

dot wasn’t playing her music in the car anymore. she was actually letting wakko ride shotgun. neither of them spoke to yakko apart from until they said goodbye to him at the school roundabout. only four days went by since the argument and things didn’t seem like they were easing up on their own.

usually, work was a distraction, but yakko didn’t want to be there. he didn’t want to go home either. he wasn’t sure where he wanted to be.

putting on a smile and being peppy and social with customers was almost second nature at this point. however, yakko was almost certain that some customers could see through his mask. he definitely noticed shawn giving him a look or two from the kiosk. it’s not like yakko could get in trouble; he was doing his job, even if he didn’t feel a hundred percent.

yakko was still functional, even if he sat on the floor in the stock room to escape his distraction. he wasn’t panicking, or about to panic. the lack of almost made it weird. the panic attacks weren’t happening daily anymore, which should have been a relief.

he didn’t realize he was sitting in the same spot as when he had his first panic attack. he didn’t notice until he heard the familiar click of the door opening, and annalise was walking in.

she stopped like she had done in the past, except the rare gentleness didn’t come out. she seemed a little disgruntled, almost upset. yakko prepared for her to either yell or vent, but instead she walked over and sat next to him, bringing her knees to her chest.

“do i need to ask?” she quietly said.

yakko quirked a brow, wondering what this was about. for as long as he’s known her, annalise wasn’t the type to just bear her soul at the drop of a whim. was something happening between her and shawn? was her health starting to falter?

“what?” he finally replied.

annalise let out a frustrated sigh. “okay, you’re making me ask.” she turned to face him, sitting so she was crossing her legs. “where the hell have you been? i haven’t seen you in almost a month. the last time i talked to you was when you asked me to pick up your brother and sister. i tried to invite you to dinner with me and bella after that - nothing. i invited you to the tattoo shop - you ghost me. shit, you pace like a freaking ghost when you roam the store. shawn says you’ve gone quiet and moody… and you had a cloud over your head?”

yakko closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the shelf behind him. was this how wakko and dot felt when he hounded them about things? he did describe annalise as his older sister…

“look, i know i sound pissed,” she went on, “but i’m…” she clenched her fists once, like she was suddenly uncomfortable. “i’m worried. i get if you don’t want to talk about your stuff - we’re not the type to do that, anyway - but… if i was doing what you’re doing, i’d want you to find me to see what’s up.” she chewed on her nails and waited.

it’s true. the time they had a bunch of wine and shared their woes was the only time they had a deep conversation about themselves. that was also the last time they hung out. yakko didn’t mean for that to happen, he didn’t intend to avoid annalise or any of his friends.

at that thought, he realized helena was right. well, he already knew she was right, but having another example of his avoidant tendencies unfold in front of him was particularly loud at that moment.

“you wanna know what’s up?” yakko asked, staring straight ahead. “i think therapy did more damage than it’s supposed to. your turn.”

for a very long minute, annalise didn’t say anything. yakko could feel her brown eyes on him, shocked. then she shifted her gaze down to her lap.

“something triggered my anxiety and i don’t know what, so i’m walking around with intrusive thoughts every waking moment.” she paused. “okay, now you.”

“my family’s been torn to pieces. you?”

“i’m having vivid nightmares where i die and no one cares.”

“someone i both love and hate died recently.”

“my intrusive thoughts consist of me impulsively fighting with and cutting off everyone i know even if they’ve done nothing to hurt me.”

another long minute of silence. then yakko moved his hand down to the floor towards annalise. she met his reach and squeezed his hand.

“i’d care,” yakko said. “and you can cut me as many times as you want, i’m not going anywhere.”

“therapy’s a bitch,” annalise replied. “trust me, it’s gotta get worse before it gets better. and i'm sorry for your loss.”

the worst was so awful, it didn’t feel like it was ever going to get better. good thing he was holding her hand, otherwise he might have slipped out of this reality. he already felt numb, and it was definitely worse than the panic attacks. at least then he could actually feel something.

“i just wanna feel alive again,” yakko softly admitted.

annalise turned her head away. she took a breath, and yakko could’ve sworn he heard it waver, but then was surprised by the sudden projection of her voice.

“you’re yakko fucking warner.”

“i-”

“shut up. look, you’re allowed to feel the shitty emotions. you got a raw deal, you can be petty and angry for the rest of your life. but so help me god - you’re not gonna be a ghost. i will force you out of your house if i have to. you’re not gonna be alone. and... don’t give up on therapy.”

that didn’t go where he expected it to go. he really wasn’t sure what to expect from her. 

“why are you telling me this?” he asked.

“because i’m selfish and i need you. i’m gonna need you when shawn and i inevitably break up. or if i end up marrying the guy, i’m gonna need you. if i go into the dark place the way you are, i’ll need you.”

“so this deep talk is about you?”

“yes, obviously.”

the breath of laughter that came out of yakko was the first sense of relief he felt all day. 

“you’ll feel alive again.” annalise gave another reassuring squeeze to his hand. “trust me.”

he heard her, and he believed her. maybe if they hadn’t had that talk on wine night, he wouldn’t have. aside from that cheesiness, everything else she said was finally sinking in.

“you’re breaking up with shawn?” 

“no. i shouldn’t, right? he’s actually nice to me. he knows about all my health crap and keeps a list of all the foods that make me sick. who does that?”

“wow, he sounds awful. dump him.”

annalise was giggling just as the door to the stock room opened. speak of the tall, curly haired devil.

he looked confused at the sight of his human girlfriend and toon friend on the floor holding hands. “you guys are lucky it’s me and not the store manager who’s catching you here, y’know that?”

annalise blinked once, and then held her hand out to him. “wanna join us? we’re talking about our feelings for once.”

he chuckled, showing off his dazzling smile. “you guys gotta get back to work.”

“please excuse my boyfriend,” annalise told yakko, “he’s going through a phase where he wants to be a figure of authority.”

“oh, i know all about that.” yakko grinned. 

with that, they both got to their feet. yakko didn’t say anything more, he didn’t need to. he left the lovebirds alone, feeling just one percent better. he couldn’t convince himself that things were going to be okay, but he had to at least try.

~

wakko still saw school as an escape, even when he lived in foster homes. the home schooling part was a way to think about anything other than what the next move was going to be. in public school, he had friends and violin to keep him occupied and that was immensely better than thinking about homework. however, the current family situation was creeping around in the back of his head, threatening to spring forward. it made him droop his head and drag his feet wherever he went.

if his friends weren’t so wonderful, they wouldn’t have said anything, but they seemed to care. they weren’t blunt about it, though. they knew wakko was finding his way back through therapy, and he didn’t really talk about that in detail. his friends were respectful of that.

“when was the last time we all hung out?” astro asked at lunchtime, the only time the three friends properly spent time together. that was his way of helping.

“right now, idiot,” wakko replied.

“outside of school, _idiot._ you need to get out of that apartment."

“and go where?”

astro thought about it, but charlie beat him to it. she pulled a crumpled purple flyer out from her backpack and attempted to smooth it out.

_night in paris prom. may 28. tickets $45._

both wakko and astro were just a little apprehensive, to which the blonde girl rolled her eyes.

“it’ll be fun! and i know i won’t have a date, so i need you two to come with me!”

wakko took the flyer and looked at it. prom was a normal teenage experience, no? but he quickly shook his head to get that thought out. surely he wasn’t that desperate to get out of the house. “since when do you care about prom? do you even wear dresses?”

“fuck no,” charlie replied. “why do you think i need i need you with me? i don’t need anyone giving me shit for not wearing a dress. but i was also thinking we could match.” she grinned.

“isn’t that what prom dates do?” astro asked, folding his arms.

“are we not in a polycystic relationship?”

wakko tilted his head. “i don’t know a lot of words, but i’m pretty sure those aren’t the right ones.”

“polycystic friendship?”

“if we agree to go, will you stop saying polycystic?” astro asked.

“we?” wakko repeated.

“hey, if i have to go down this road, i’m dragging you down with me.”

charlie was now beaming, her dimples showing. “yes! we have to buy tickets this week before the prices go up!”

now wakko was nervous. he was going to have to talk to yakko, and he wasn’t exactly looking forward to it. the night before, wakko had a nasty nausea spell from his medication, and he spent several hours in the bathroom. yakko told him that if he threw up, he would feel better. wakko told him to stop talking to him; not necessarily to be mean, but because the noise agitated him even more. 

it really felt like this medicine and yakko’s attempts at support weren’t putting wakko back together again.

so wakko couldn’t exactly go to his brother and ask for money or permission to go out, much less get a ride there. the prom was taking place at the marriott downtown, and getting there was going to be hectic.

not to mention, dot would get upset. she wanted the complete high school experience. she wanted to be a cheerleader, that didn’t work out. she wanted to be in the school play, also didn’t work. she most likely would try to get invited to prom as a freshman, and she certainly wouldn’t want to go with her brother.

not that he would invite her… wakko just wanted time with his friends. charlie and astro were right, he needed to get out of that tiny apartment. he needed something to look forward to after all this grief.

“we should just wear black,” astro suggested. “it’s easier to find, and we’re only gonna wear these things once.”

wakko nodded lightly at that. he did have a black dress shirt in his closet… it’d be nice to not associate that article of clothing with a funeral.

“i’ll drop links to shirts and ties in the group chat,” charlie said, completely disregarding his words. “hopefully we can plan better next year when we’re seniors.”

then she and astro began to talk about how crazy it was that they were graduating next year. wakko checked out of the conversation and looked down at his half eaten lunch, his head starting to pound. there was already enough on his plate. thinking about the future and the fact that everyone around him seemed so sure of what they were going to do after high school was a bit much.

dot was in a similar headspace. she sat with her group in the grass, staring at the tree they were all under. she had lost the topic of conversation long ago, just eating her lunch and letting her mind go blank. she didn’t tell anyone apart from jasmine what had happened with her family, and jasmine was just… a good friend. she kept the attention off of dot and just let her be.

just being around people was supposed to be good for you, right? while dot couldn’t see this group leaving her because of her silence, she couldn’t see them staying with her long term either. she wasn’t sure if it was because she was a ‘normie’ amongst a group of goths, or if it was the trauma talking to her.

she blinked once, the sound of the bell bringing her back to reality. this group of friends were never in a hurry to get to class, but for once, dot didn’t want to hang back with them. she grabbed her backpack and her trash as she stood up. she said goodbye to her friends as she went to throw away her lunch tray, and then fixed her yellow sundress as she went in the direction of her next class. the way she stood out sitting with four goths must have been a sight.

she wasn’t expecting to be followed, and she certainly wasn’t expecting lucy. she was nice, but never had dot spoken to her one-on-one.

“are you going to the dance team auditions?” lucy asked her. “it’s on friday! ms. mercer put up the sign up sheet in the dance room, and i didn’t see your name on it.”

in all honesty, dot forgot about that. it just didn’t seem that important anymore. besides, nothing else seemed to work out for her this year, in every aspect.

“oh…” she replied. “mm, probably not.”

“really? jasmine told me how you wanted to be on the team since the beginning of the school year!” lucy told her. “i have to audition to keep my spot for next year, so you’ll be seeing me there. it’d be nice to have a familiar face on the team.”

dot shrugged. “i’ll think about it, but… some stuff has happened, and everything i originally wanted just doesn’t make sense anymore. like, i can’t believe i wanted cheer, theatre, dance, and everything else all at once.”

lucy nodded understandingly. she and dot came to a stop outside one of the pods, where they had to go their own ways.

“well, i’m here if you need to talk. and... it might cheer you up if you make the dance team.”

“what makes you think i’ll achieve that?”

“you’re a good dancer, ms. mercer loves you, and the dance team gets to vote on new members. so i can put in a good word for you.”

dot still felt cynical, but she knew she would hate herself if she missed out on this. “fine. i’ll try to be there.”

that made lucy bounce on her feet in excitement. “yay! okay, i’ll see you then!”

well... it gave dot something else to think about. time to figure out whether or not she could handle another loss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not much to say here, just follow me on [tumblr](http://hilariouslyedgy.tumblr.com/) where i post brainrot about this fic :)


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